Ever since being given the title of "Mom", I have been careful with this identity, hoping to use my best efforts to "educate" this little guy well.
This is also the reason why I did not give my children full authority to the elderly to take, and I became a full-time mother without hesitation.
Five years of companionship, but let me find that what I learned from him is actually more and more valuable than educating him.
1、
It rained yesterday, and Shuo Shuo came back from school and couldn't wait to put on his beloved little rain boots and go out to tread watering holes.
We packed up as fast as we could and went out.
As soon as he reached downstairs, he found a puddle, and Shuo Shuo rushed toward the puddle excitedly, and when he reached the puddle, he suddenly slowed down.
Put the boots into the water a little bit, observe the moment when each part of the boots comes into contact with the water, feel the texture of the water, feel the temperature of the water...
Then he stepped on it a few more times, and when he saw the splash of water splashing out, he was even more excited and began to jump and jump...
Every time I follow the child and quietly observe him playing, I feel very healing.
As long as you are willing to follow your child, he always has the ability to bring you into the deep present moment and make you forget all your troubles.
Because of the full-time baby, I have a lot of time with this little guy.
We ate together and carefully tasted the taste of each dish.
Together, we observed how butterflies fly and how snails climb.
Together, we admire the little buds in the plush coat in winter, the cute appearance of the grass sticking out of the head in the spring, and the red maple leaves falling in the autumn.
Look at the clouds in the sky together, and then imagine the sky.
……
As adults, we don't know when to start, less and less able to enjoy the moment, always in a hurry, but forget to appreciate the scenery along the way.
Therefore, there is a sigh of "the more you grow up, the lonelier you are, and the more you grow up, the more unhappy you are".
This state of separation of mind and body is the source of our unhappiness.
If you are willing to let go of the lofty posture and follow the footsteps of your child religiously, you will find that he has been telling you:
The most precious thing in the world is not "not to get" and "to lose", but to grasp happiness in this moment.
2、
In the first few years of my motherhood, I was often anxious about my child's feeding, sleeping, learning to climb, learning to talk, and so on.
Fear of missing out on your child's sensitive period.
In the process of parenting, I slowly discovered that the rhythm of each child is really different.
I read an article before, "Since raising children as plants, I feel much better."
I think this realization is so right.
Plants have their growth cycle, when to flower, when to bear fruit, what fruit, are all determined by seeds, and have little to do with what we do the day after tomorrow.
Since I realized this, I no longer worry about whether the child is more than one year old and still diapers, walking a little earlier and later, eating a little more and a little less.
The child's personality is different, he likes to run and jump outdoors, does not like to play quietly, I take him to the park every day to enjoy the fun, he likes to read, I accompany him to read, he likes to be in a daze, let him be in a daze...
As long as you allow him to grow at his own pace, the growth will become natural and smooth, and you will be comfortable with each other.
The growth of children makes me rethink my life state.
Is our seed free to grow as it is?
I found myself not growing according to the guidance of my own seed.
Many times, we are used to listening to the outside voices and walking according to the standards of parents and society.
Living less and less like yourself, twisting inside.
So, now I allow my child to grow at his pace.
And try to find your own seed, follow the guidance of the seed, and grow again.
03、
In the five years I spent with my children, I not only understood the meaning of living in the moment, but also realized that to find my own seeds, I found:
My curiosity was rekindled and I became interested in a lot of things that I had previously overlooked.
Together we designed mini-games and made up stories, and my imagination was rekindled.
In order to overcome the yelling, my emotional management skills improved a lot.
Rudolf Steiner said:
"All education is actually self-education, and the child educates himself in the environment.
As parents and teachers, we are only part of the child's environment, we must try to make ourselves the best environment, patiently awaken children's concepts and feelings, awaken the soul that will surely sprout and grow. ”
In fact, in the process of awakening children to grow, we are also awakening ourselves.