Children always have a strong curiosity about new things, especially for the items in the hands of others, thinking that it must be the best thing in the world, and they will be particularly envious of wanting to have it. At this time, the child faces the "temptation", and there is a good chance that he cannot resist it.
Even if it is given by the uncles and aunts we know, we still have to teach our children to learn to refuse;
If it is a stranger with an unhealthy heart who throws a "temptation" to the child, the consequences...
So, how to teach children to resist temptations and enhance social immunity from primary school?
"Enjoy life!"
It was the only advertising word that remained in my memory. There is only one time in life, and it is our right and happiness to do what you want to do, so parents will say to their children: "Just do what you want to do, enjoy your life." "But pursuing what you really want is different from satisfying an instant desire. In this day and age of consumerism and omnipotence, there are too many temptations to stimulate people's desires. Prophets have predicted that around 2020, humanity will enter an era of ultra-freedom. The freer you are, the more desires there will be, and the more temptations there will be to stimulate them. The more this happens, the more we have to find the goal we really want, and boldly give up unsuitable desires for this goal, and resist bad temptations.
If someone keeps tempting us like this: "What does it mean to live a plain life?" Don't make up your own mind, take shortcuts! What's the big deal about conscience? Everyone else is like that. Don't be so dead-eyed, as if you were detached yourself. "But when you're 60 years old, you'll find that if you can't resist the temptation of the moment and become cowardly and cowardly, you'll ultimately suffer." Don't give your dreams and hopes to temptation, or you will have nothing and may become meaningless even in life itself.
So I always tell young parents that if you want to make good use of your child's talents, you must first cultivate your child's ability to resist temptation resolutely.
Resist the temptation of the child vs the child addicted to temptation
Stanford University in the United States did a trial for preschoolers: give each child a marshmallow, and then tell them that if they insist on not eating for 15 minutes, they will be given another marshmallow. Some of the children did not hold back and ate the marshmallow 15 minutes ago, while the other part of the children each got a marshmallow.
About 10 years later, experts followed up on the children who participated in the trial and found that the children who could endure for 15 minutes had better academic performance, good friend relations, and effectively relieved stress than the children who ate marshmallows in advance. In just 15 minutes, a child who can resist the temptation to eat marshmallows is even better.
Once the child has passed the period of absolute protection of the mother, he begins to have a sense of freedom and develops the psychology of satisfying his desires according to his own wishes.
Wait 15 minutes and get a marshmallow child who can effectively dominate his own sense of freedom and resist temporary temptations for a larger purpose. This is not instinct, but the result of education. Where did they learn that? Of course, parents who educate their children all the time in their lives.
One spring, I was struck by what a professor from an elite American school said to me, saying, "Among the students in our school who were found to be cheating, the largest number of Koreans were Koreans, and the materials submitted by Korean students were very poorly credible." "I was speechless. There are now frequent reports of cheating among international students, and even on the homepage of the Study Abroad Service Center, there is a warning that "in English-speaking countries, cheating will be ordered to be withdrawn". It can be seen that the problem of cheating by Korean students has become an issue of international concern.
In order to be ahead of others, such students cannot resist temporary temptations, and they have committed inappropriate behavior, and their ability to resist temptations is extremely poor. This is mainly because parents teach them from an early age that in order to compete with others, they can only win, not lose, and neglect to teach their children how to resist temptation.
Teach children "Qu Ze Quan"
Lao Tzu's Tao Te Ching mentions "Qu Ze Quan", which means to seek perfection by means to seek perfection. That is, the road or river is not straight, but meanders and finally reaches its destination.
When the local meta-environment is only suitable for opening a winding road, it must open the road to the mountain, destroy the terrain, and finally destroy the surrounding ecological environment, and the opening of the road becomes meaningless.
If we follow the laws of nature, do not destroy the existing environment, and go around a little, we will reap more: the high green mountains teach us solemnity and determination, and the rivers that surround the green mountains and rivers that do not flow teach us to live humbly and softly.
Children also have their own path in life. In life, I have also been conflicted by many trials and inevitable choices. What if I couldn't have a relaxed mindset and couldn't resist temporary temptations? It might have been satisfying at the time, but in the end my life wouldn't be as fulfilling as it is now.
Although the river meanders and flows, its main direction is unchanged. The same is true of life, sometimes there may be detours, but in the end it will not be lost.
Life doesn't have accurate answers or formulas like math problems. The more complex the world, the more times it takes to make good judgments and choices. Many parents are very willing to be by their children's side and work tirelessly to make choices for their children. However, parents simply do not have so much energy to make all the choices for their children, and the correct judgment and choice ultimately have to be made by the children themselves. At this time, parents should train their children to resist temptation.
If you just do what you want to do now, your child won't know how to endure and wait to achieve the ultimate goal, and the odds of making a wrong decision will be high. Children who can't even wait 15 minutes, children who eat marshmallows and students who do improper behavior for the sake of immediate grades, they have little hope of success.
If you hope that your child can create a wonderful life on their own, as a parent, you must first restrain yourself and do not unconditionally meet the requirements of your child. If the child makes a small character and makes unreasonable demands, let the child know why his request is unreasonable, thus stimulating the child's determination to resist temptation.
How many mothers are soft-hearted because they see their children crying, afraid of being in public places? It is absolutely not advisable to complain from those around you and to meet the unreasonable demands of children in a hurry. Always led by the child's nose, the child's ability to resist temptation will only decrease, in order to "eat the marshmallow in front of him", I don't know what will be done.
It is not easy to train children to follow the path they should take, but this can only be done by parents, which is the responsibility of parents.
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