It may be that there are so few children in the family that the protection and coddling of parents for their children is becoming more and more serious. The reason why parents are like this is nothing more than these two reasons: one is because of love, and the other is afraid of their children's suffering and suffering. So no matter what they do, they do a good job for their children in advance, reducing the chances of children trying and making mistakes.
From the perspective of outsiders, this kind of parenting method of "arranging everything for children and avoiding setbacks and mistakes for children" is definitely wrong. However, there are not a few parents who hold this attitude to parenting, and there is a growing trend. This parenting style is known as "lawn mower parenting".
As the name suggests, the "lawn mower parent" is like a lawn mower, helping children clear all obstacles in life. With such parents, the child's growth path will naturally not encounter suffering and setbacks, and naturally does not require the child to think and analyze. In my opinion, parents who hold this concept hurt their children more than "helicopter parents", and helicopter parents will at least hover over their children, waiting for their children to help when they are in trouble, so as not to sweep everywhere.
So what are lawn mower parents? Take the example of children writing homework, helicopter parents will keep saying, "Hurry up, hurry up", and constantly urge their children to write homework. Lawn mower parents are different, they will directly help their children with homework, or even complete it all.
Below, I summarize the 5 characteristics of lawn mower parents, parents may wish to take a seat
1. Children are not allowed to have conflicts
Conflict with others is inevitable as your child grows up, which helps you learn to communicate, deal with emotions, and persevere and compromise.
But lawn mower parents will never allow this conflict to occur, and they will apologize for their children in order to avoid conflict, and even scold each other.
2. Help your child clean up the mess
To educate children, parents adhere to a standard of "do their own things, do themselves; do what they do wrong, take responsibility for themselves". For example, homework should be completed on time, and mistakes should be apologized to themselves, and only when children have experienced it themselves can they learn experience and lessons.
Lawn mower parents do not want their children to experience these "pains", they will arrange everything for their children. The child's homework, they help to do; when it is not finished, they explain it to the teacher for the child. Children forget to bring things with them to school, and they will travel thousands of miles to school.
3, no confidence in children
There is a song whose lyrics read" "How to see the rainbow without experiencing wind and rain", and the road to children's growth cannot be smooth. But the lawn mower parents have no confidence at all, always worried that the child is still young, certainly can not do it, so they deprive the child of the opportunity to try and progress. Over time, children become lazy, unconfident, and irresponsible.
4. Will not reject the child
Unlike helicopter parents, lawn mower parents can't see their children angry and crying, so they will meet all the requirements of their children. If the child wants it, they buy it; if other people's children have it, they also want it; if the child doesn't want it, they will also prepare to surprise the child in advance.
5. Keep asking the teacher about the child's situation
Lawn mower parents are very concerned about their children's situation at school, worried about whether their children will be bullied and whether they will be wronged, so they often call the teacher to consult the child's recent situation.
Of course, it does not mean that communication with the teacher is not right, but if parents cannot listen to different opinions and protect their children in everything, that is the problem.
How should "lawn mower" parents adjust their parenting style?
Through the previous description, everyone should have a certain understanding of the parenting style of lawn mower parents. If you find that you have the characteristics of lawn mower parents, you may wish to improve from the following aspects.
1. Let go of anxiety
Most lawn mower parents are anxious about their children, and they are afraid that their children will make mistakes and be wronged, so they take care of everything for their children everywhere. For the sake of their children, it should be long-term, parents should let go of anxiety, under the premise of ensuring safety, let children try more, and children who grow up in difficulties are full of resilience.
2. Reasonable refusal
For the child's request, parents can not respond to every request, but must learn to refuse appropriately. Parents must not see their children angry and crying, so they compromise, after all, children can have a few who do not lose their temper and do not cry. If you can't resist to compromise, first change someone to face your child.
3. Have confidence in your children
In addition, the reason why the lawn mower parents handle everything for their children is that they do not have confidence in their children and do not want to see him suffer. It is inevitable that children will encounter difficulties on the way to growth, and what parents should do is to teach their children the skills to analyze difficulties and solve problems, rather than handling all things for their children and depriving them of the opportunity to experience.
Finally, tell the "lawn mower parents" a sentence: "Sometimes learn to let go", which is the concept of parenting that we must keep in mind all the time.