How do I deal with my son's "set card"

【Parents' Talk】

About two or three years ago, I took my son to the stationery store next to the neighborhood. After buying stationery, he asked me to buy him some boxes of cards. At first I thought the cards were playing cards, so I asked him, "Why do you want to buy playing cards at home?" "He told me that cards are not playing cards, but a more popular game among children. So we spent a few tens of dollars to buy three or four packs of cards, and when we opened them, I didn't think so: "Isn't this just a comic book character drawn on a playing card?" What's the fun? "But my son's reaction was noticeably different from mine, he thought it was funny, fiddling with cards over and over again, with words in his mouth.

Later, he often told me about the classmate set card, the proper nouns of various set cards, what thunder version, nebula version, what SR, HR and the like, and occasionally used his pocket money to buy a box or two. Usually when he talks about cards, I deal with the past with "uh-huh", and I don't take it seriously. However, when it came to my child's fifth grade birthday, I asked him what he wanted as a birthday present, and he actually wanted a box of cards and a "black diamond" of hundreds of dollars. It's been two or three years, and he's still so preoccupied, it seems that I'm going to take a good look at what magic this card really has.

So, I seriously asked my son for advice and asked him to tell him where the magic of this card was and why the children were so obsessed. As soon as he heard that I cared about the things he liked, he was very happy, so he said "bamboo tube pour beans" and popularized a lot of knowledge about cards for me in a short period of time.

Originally, these cards were mainly anime-based, such as Ultraman, Douluo Continent, etc. The types of cards collected by boys and girls are not very different. The price of the cards is different, the cheap dozens of dollars a pack, the expensive dozens or even hundreds of dollars, with the rarity of the card and the rise of the ship. But until you open the box containing the cards, you don't know what rare cards are in the box, similar to a blind box.

He said the vast majority of his classmates were more or less involved. Some students are tireless, not only let their parents buy, but also use their own pocket money to press the old money to buy. Compare between students to see who has more rare cards, and students with more rare cards will become the object of everyone's envy. Moreover, students also exchange cards with each other, exchange with each other, cards have become one of the most important mediums for children to socialize, if there is no set card, they may not find a common topic, and they are excluded from a specific circle.

After asking my son to popularize the relevant knowledge for me, I asked some other children I knew, and checked the information on the Internet. It turns out that children's card collection has become one of the most popular activities among elementary school students. However, this has also caused a series of problems, some are spending too much money on this, parents feel very unworthy; some are too addicted to it, affecting learning, etc., thus causing a lot of family conflicts.

Let's start with the problem of spending a lot of money. According to the data, there are some companies specializing in cards with an annual turnover of more than one billion yuan or more in a single store, and how much is the cost of the cards themselves? According to the person in charge of the card production company, the average is not more than a dime per card! In the hands of primary school students, the average price per card is at least one yuan or more, and a rare card costs tens of yuan, hundreds of yuan, and thousands of yuan, that is to say, the profit is at least ten times the starting point, and it is not unusual to start with a hundred times and a thousand times. In this way, it is indeed quite profitable. However, the primary school students who collect cards do not see it this way, and some cards are treasures in their eyes. I think that different eras have different gameplay, twenty or thirty years ago to shoot Foreign paintings, or buy instant noodles set card, etc., in essence, it is no different from the current set card.

Of course, everything has a degree. If the child is addicted to it, it not only spends a lot of money to buy, but also affects the learning is not good. So what if this happens? I think the most basic principle is to "loosen" rather than "block".

From an adult point of view, to understand the reasons for children to collect cards, although there will be some comparison psychology, but also a medium of social interaction. Through this medium, children can have a certain sense of belonging.

At the same time, in the matter of children's collection cards, we must not only see the negative effect, but also learn to borrow strength and exert its positive role. For example, asking a child to talk about the plot in a card, in addition to repeating the existing plot in the anime, can also create a new plot through imagination and write it down, which exercises both oral expression and written expression.

The card is usually marked with the character's combat strength value, initially understand the size of the combat power value, compare the individual's winning and losing relationship, and then you can randomly combine to see how these combinations are calculated from the combat strength value, and how it is possible to win and lose, which exercises the child's perception and calculation ability of numbers. Guide children to hand-draw the character patterns in the cards, or use clay sculptures to turn two-dimensional pictures into three-dimensional sculptures, which invisibly cultivates children's hands-on ability and aesthetic ability. By guiding children to understand the ratio of the cost price of the card to the selling price, discuss whether the investment card is worth it, how to manage their own property, do reasonable expenses, and cultivate the child's financial quotient. Guide them to start from collecting cards and moving to activities such as stamp collecting and coin collecting, which can strengthen their learning of subject knowledge such as historical geography. In short, if adults can think about it more, then the children's set card can be converted into a learning resource, because with the help of children's love, it must be both happy and efficient to learn.

Some children are addicted to it, and it is more likely that it is not the attraction of the card, but because of the tension between parents and children in real life, the lack of a sense of achievement, and the inability to find a sense of belonging. At this time, you can't put the board on the cards, but we must solve the problem fundamentally in a targeted manner.

After I had finished discussing the issue of cards with my son, I told him that Zi Xia, a disciple of Confucius in the Analects, had said something like this: "Although there is a small way, there will be considerable people, and zhiyuan will be afraid of mud, and it is a gentleman who does not do anything." "Everything may be interesting to study in depth, but for the sake of a longer-term goal in life, there must be a choice." If there were only two activities to choose from, one was playing cards and the other was reading, which one would you prefer? He told me that I still had to choose to read because reading could be more expansive and deeper, but cards could not. My son's choice made me, the father, let go of the hanging heart.

(Author: Yu Xiaobing, Chinese Teacher, Affiliated Experimental Middle School of Beijing Normal University)

(Guangming Daily)