Moral life is the happiest, moral integrity and ability are the happiest!
Dissemination: Sinology 丨 Culture 丨 Parent-child 丨 Education 丨 Traditional Chinese Medicine | healthy
Pass: Love Earth | Love all things | positive energy
With the landing of the national double reduction policy, the mentality of parents can be described as a mixture of five tastes:
There is a long-awaited relief,
There is no way out for the child to ask for points,
There is a bottomless anxiety about children's learning after double subtraction,
There is the anxiety of suddenly loosening the shackles and not knowing how to connect...
The introduction and implementation of the "double reduction" policy will return education to the family, which also means that children will spend more and more time with their parents on the road of future growth.
In the future, in addition to schoolwork, the focus of evaluating children will be the advantages and disadvantages of family education, and the pattern and responsibility of parents determine the success of family education.
After the double reduction, how should family education make up for it?
First of all, it is necessary to clarify what family education is.
The mainland's newly promulgated Family Education Promotion Law has been officially implemented since January 1, 2022, which gives a clear definition of "family education": "Family education refers to the cultivation, guidance and influence of parents or other guardians on the moral character, physical fitness, living technology, cultural accomplishment, behavior and habits implemented by parents or other guardians to promote the comprehensive and healthy growth of minors." ”
From the national definition of family education, it can be seen that the double reduction policy is actually a redefinition and repositioning of the responsibility for family education.
This also reminds people of the talent training subordination of "self-cultivation, family unity, governance, and peace in the world" that the ancients have always adhered to.
The child is the crystallization and continuation of the parents' life, but also an important member of the family, its behavior, psychology, etc. are directly affected by the family, huge, difficult to eliminate, and are also destined to accompany the child's life.
Family education is not only the education of life technology and basic knowledge, but also the all-round cultivation and guidance of morality, physical fitness, housework, traditional cultural knowledge, behavior habits and so on.
Therefore, it means that parents must first clearly recognize themselves and constantly reflect on themselves and improve themselves.
Because education has never been just the education of knowledge, there are more levels of subtle inheritance and replication.
Parents are the soil, and children will eventually become recycled products that carry the shadow of their parents.
I believe that many parents hope to see that the children we have cultivated throughout their lives can grow into a well-rounded person with moral, intellectual, physical, and aesthetic development.
A person who is physically and mentally healthy and loves life,
An independent person who adapts to social development in the future and can fulfill his life responsibilities and life responsibilities.
Therefore, in the face of the change of the concept of test-taking education and the diversified social environment in the future, what children really fight is actually the sound life education concept in the family and the comprehensive education level of parents.
For family education, not only does it not reduce responsibility and quality, but it increases the educational responsibility of parents or other guardians in the family and the obligation to participate in the growth of children.
01
Family education begins with the cultivation of an independent personality
Anxious times, anxious parents. Parents want their children to become dragons and daughters to become phoenixes, and they want to give the best to their children.
When children are no longer on the go from cram school to school, they have more time to connect with their families and spend time with their parents.
For parents and children, whether in the soul or in life, there is room for more sunlight to shine in.
Since ancient times, Chinese has attached great importance to family education, leaving behind the ancient adage that "morality has been passed down from generation to generation, and poetry and books have been passed down from generation to generation".
"Rise at dawn, sweep the court, and keep the inside and out tidy; and when you are at night, close the door, and check it yourself." The opening chapter of "Zhu Zizhijia Maxim" tells how to start from the morning and evening of each day, and develop good living habits by sorting out internal affairs.
Family education, the first thing to do is to cultivate children's self-care ability and housework ability.
Let the child learn to do some housework within their ability, start from the simplest small things, and experience the sense of presence and giving as a family member.
For example, as soon as you enter the door, let the child set up his shoes, wipe the table before eating and set the chopsticks, wash the dishes after the meal, and clean up the desk after writing homework every day.
Slowly, guide and train children to help parents do more things, such as pouring tea and water, answering phone calls, cleaning, ordering food and shopping, etc., to experience the happiness of ordinary life.
Let children experience a sense of accomplishment, order and proportion in housework, and establish confidence and sense of autonomy as an independent individual.
Some families lack this aspect of their children's education, resulting in many growing problems.
For example, some children never do housework during primary school, and when they go to middle school, they are very unaccustomed and frustrated.
Its parents often really realize at this time that the parents' labor in life is actually a lack of wisdom behavior, which is equivalent to depriving the child of the right to experience growth and learn to understand new things, and it is also a dereliction of duty to cultivate the child's independent ability.
There is nothing more important in this world than self-care ability, and when your child can arrange the time and space of his life properly and keep things around him in order, he will naturally have the joy of being satisfied with a sense of self-worth psychologically.
2
Homeschooling begins with doing sports with your children
Exercise can not only exercise children's physical fitness, but also promote their physical and mental health.
Once a child develops a good habit of exercise, no matter what troubles he encounters, he can quickly adjust his or her state through exercise.
Children who insist on exercising will not only greatly improve their physical fitness, but also temper their will, and when they encounter difficulties and setbacks in their future life and learning, they will also have more courage and determination to face and resolve.
Parents can choose to run with their children in the early morning of the weekend, bathe in the morning light together, and enjoy the joy of sweat wetting their foreheads.
For boys, it is best for fathers to often take their children to the outdoors, close to nature, running, climbing, playing ball, in short, accompanying children to exercise, helping children develop a sports skill, which is very important.
Similarly, the presence of a father brings a greater sense of strength and security to the girl.
Research has proved that children who have a good relationship with their fathers from an early age are more likely to get along with their superiors when they grow up.
3
Family education allows traditional culture to take root in intergenerational inheritance
China's excellent traditional culture has gone through the great waves of history, destroyed, annihilated and reborn countless times, but it has only been completely preserved in the reproduction and transmission of family ties.
Its shadow can be seen in the many family shrines and academies that still stand in the mountains and countryside, in the ancient tombs where the royal families have been buried in the past, and in the cultural relics museums guarded by specific families.
These classic ancient books, painted carvings, pottery instrumental music, techniques and folklore, etc., are all treasures left by Chinese ancestors to future generations, and they are also the destination of the hearts of Chinese sons and daughters.
Similarly, family education is also nourished and enriched in the preservation and protection of traditional culture, and it is flourishing and fruitful.
The parenting experience of the ancients is especially worthy of reference by modern people, especially the educational method of classical recitation, which has extremely precious value.
Simple and practical characteristics, so that it runs through the six stages of life of fetal infant raising deficiency, infant raising, child cultivation, juvenile raising ambition, adult morality, and elderly welfare, which can be described as tireless and unpleasant.
The ancients said: "Marry a wife and marry a sage, you can prosper for three generations", which refers to the importance of mothers being reasonable in family education.
If a pregnant mother can adhere to the classic recitation during the child's fetal infant stage, then her baby can be said to be a person born with a "golden key".
In the process of children's growth, parents can accompany their children to recite the classics in the early morning or before going to bed, so that the energy of the classics can fill the children's hearts, be sincere, cultivate morality, and nourish the lives of the family and children.
The bibliography for reciting the classics can be selected from traditional classics such as the Dedao Jing, Zhou Yi, The Analects, The University, the Zhongyong, and the Three Character Classic. Words have the power to enlighten wisdom, and the power of classics is even more incredible.
4
Family education should conform to the child's talent
Everyone comes into this world with their own talents.
When educating children, we must be good at observation, discover children's talents, and induce them to cultivate them.
Some children are introverted and like to delve into learning; some children are lively and active, and like to embrace nature.
We do not have to force the child to do what to do, but to fully tap the child's talent, make up for the strengths, and establish the child's self-confidence in doing things independently. Self-confidence is the cornerstone of the future.
5
Family education also requires the wisdom of Grace and Grace
Family education in the late period of ancient China was often a popular stick education that was too harsh, and after the reform and opening up of modern society, it fell to the other extreme, and indiscriminate care and praise were rampant.
Family education that has lost the way of adhering to the middle is either "stick killing" or "killing", and the most scarce thing at present is the tutor who combines grace and power and tolerance and severity.
The Four Classics of the Yellow Emperor has a cloud: "Jinggong selflessly rewards and punishes the letter." Mencius said, "Teaching is also multi-skilled." ”
In family education, warmth and appreciation are important, but the necessary norms and punishments are also indispensable.
If warmth and appreciation are a river of spring water, then norms and punishments are solid berms on both sides. In order for the river not to flood, the constraint of the berm is indispensable.
Ten thousand families have ten thousand looks, and how to grasp the scale of family education is a subject that tests the wisdom of parents.
First of all, parents must lead by example everywhere, be honest and trustworthy, and set a good example for their children;
Secondly, we must be a parent with real "morality" with heart, not only to have the "dry morality" and responsibility of self-improvement, but also to have the "moral virtue" and action ability to correct ourselves in a down-to-earth manner;
Third, we must cultivate our own learning thinking as parents, be open and tolerant of new ideas, and enhance our ability to integrate and innovate and use;
Fourth, respect the child, take the initiative to listen to the interaction with them, be humble and consult, make friends with the child, and pay attention to the child's physical and mental changes in time;
Fifth, strive to establish a rigorous and lively educational approach.
The child is the shadow of the parents, the parents are the child's first teacher, the parents must be responsible for their own actions, that is, responsible for the child's life, as the ancients said, "I am three provinces and my body", "then know and act without fault".
Family education requires every family member to learn together with their children and make progress together in order to achieve the same frequency resonance.
The world is changing all the time, and every parent should establish the belief of lifelong learning.
Only by self-improvement in continuous learning can we handle the scale of family education with ease, optimize the parent-child relationship, achieve high-harmony companionship and high-quality family education, and truly create a bright future for children.
END
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Author: Wan Muqing Editor: Deming An With Photo: Qing Shui he
Recording: Xu Jiayu Review: Zhou Chi Review: Lu Yanrong Editing: Qingfeng
Virtue wisdom education, credit is happy!
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