Hello everyone, I'm Cocoa.
Some friends reported to me: "My children always grind and rub their homework, play with stationery boxes for a while, play with pens for a while, and the homework that can be completed in 1 hour is dragged to more than 10 o'clock at night to be done, and the supervision of the baby's homework is broken, what to do?"
Children's homework grinding is the "first problem" for parents in the world.
Some parents say that tutoring or supervising their children's homework is really the hardest and most tiring job in the world, more tiring than going to work.
Sitting next to him and watching, it is really a person who is in a hurry, it can really be said that "the emperor is not anxious for eunuchs"!
Many children will not take the initiative to do homework, after eating at night by their parents yelling, shouting, nagging, into their rooms, cleaning stationery to rub for a few minutes, turn on the lights, pour water, set up a posture, and rub for a few minutes, everything is ready, and then in a daze for half a day.
It's hard to get started, and after a while the pencil is broken, and you have to be busy sharpening the pencil, or going to the toilet.
In order to urge their children not to rub it, some parents take a small board and sit next to them as a "supervisor", and find that they can't do any homework.
The child is a little older, does not accept the supervision of this way, do homework to close their own doors, parents have to find a variety of excuses to check the child, such as bringing a cup of water into it, cutting an apple, etc., it turns out that the child is still grinding foreign workers.
Thousands of grinding, staying up until 11 o'clock at night, watching the child sleepy, tomorrow will have to get up early to go to school, no matter how strong the parents, can only let the child strip to sleep.
Is it often staged in your family the above story?
To solve the problem of children's homework grinding and delaying, we must first find out the cause of the crux, so that we can prescribe the right medicine and ensure that the rectification measures are effective.
There are generally 5 types of reasons for children's friction and procrastination, and parents should compare which categories your children belong to:
The first, the nature of nature.
Have you found that children's movements are inherently slow, especially children under 7 years old, and their movements are generally slow.
There's a reason for this, because kids have been "long brains" from 3 to 7 years old. The child's brain capacity has been rising, so adding more stimulus connections, so that the area of the cerebral cortex continues to increase, and the connections on the cerebral cortex are also increasing.
Therefore, the child should not be too eager to urge his speed, especially in the first and second grades of primary school, and cannot be compared with the requirements of adults. So how can this problem be improved? Later, I will talk about the method, and everyone will read it.
Second, the package substitution.
In ordinary life, many parents do too much to replace, resulting in children having no sense of responsibility, which is an important reason for children to grind and delay.
Because many children procrastinate, thinking that some parents will mop the floor anyway, they can't finish their parents will help or think of a way, and even their parents are watching, the speed is fast, no one is staring at it is very lazy.
The occurrence of such problems in children has a very large relationship with the parenting method that parents do everything instead.
Third, there is no interest.
Some procrastination in children is not intentionally caused by interest. If the child is not interested in what the parent or teacher is asking to do, he is reluctant to participate and will resist with deliberate rubbing and procrastination.
Fourth, inattention.
Sometimes children procrastinate and rub, which is caused by inattention. In fact, many adults are not efficient, and there is also a problem of inattention, which can be improved through training.
Fifth, evade additional demands.
Some children do homework and rub it, which is a deliberate act to evade the parents' additional requirements.
There is a story about a first-grade boy whose mother said he was particularly abrasive and that 1 hour of homework he needed 3 hours to complete.
Later, the mother gave feedback to the teacher, and the teacher asked the boy if this was the case, but the boy said: "I finished my homework, and I still had to do the homework left by my mother, and then I had to review and prepare, and the fool finished it so quickly!"
After figuring out the causes of the child's rubbing, how can we help the child improve this behavior one by one?
First, give your child a "rhythm" stimulus.
For the first problem, in addition to slowly waiting for the child to grow up, parents can also do some intervention work. That is, using clever methods, give children the stimulation of "short frequency and fast frequency".
For example, when you get up in the morning, you will say to your child: "See who of us wears clothes the fastest, see who of us finishes brushing our teeth..."
When eating, say to the child, "Look at whoever finishes eating first, who is the best!" Constantly giving children such a reasonable "rhythm" stimulus can effectively promote the establishment of children's speed awareness.
Second, parents let go and let their children do it themselves.
Here parents must first distinguish between what the child can do independently and what needs the help of the parents. Those who need help can assist, can be done independently, and resolutely let the child complete it independently.
Gentle and firm, is a very recognized concept of Coco's mother, gentle when helping, the child himself can not do well, then it is necessary to firmly refuse the child's behavior of seeking help.
For example, eating must be the child's own thing parents should do, the child does not eat must not be fed, this bad habit must not be used to, here you can train the behavior of shouting to stop, a thing is not completed within the specified time immediately shouted to stop, let the child bear the consequences.
Or take eating as an example, we give the child enough time, say half an hour to collect the bowl, the child rubbed for half an hour after not eating, also immediately put away the bowl, do not give the child snacks in the middle, let the child bear the consequences of hunger.
Hungry a meal will not be hungry bad children, hungry children will deeply remember, I myself grinding and delaying eating slowly, is to bear the consequences of their own hunger, the next time he will naturally be fast, he will think, I do not eat quickly, my mother will collect the bowl. At this time, the child's sense of rules is also established.
Third, increase your child's interest.
Since the child has no interest, it is necessary to find a way to mobilize the child's interest point.
As mentioned in the first point just now, in ordinary life, we will cultivate more speed and efficiency, and have more activities of a competitive nature.
For example, you can play some one-minute games with your child at home: for example, math pass, Chinese character writing pass, word pass, etc., the purpose is to improve the child's interest, then pay attention to the child's achievements and compare, with the improvement must praise the child's efforts, so that the interest is more intense.
Fourth, do concentration training.
For concentration training, I mentioned in detail in the previous article "Insist on 3 small things, can make the children with the lowest grades rank among the best, it is strongly recommended to collect and try", interested friends can go to the front to see, here we recommend that you try "Schult Square Concentration Training", this training method is very classic and effective.
In addition to strengthening the training of attention, parents can also divide a whole section of work into several small sections to complete, do not require the child to do it in one go, so that after decomposition, the child is easier to complete.
Fifth, the additional requirements for layout should be clarified.
If parents and children assign additional tasks, be sure to explain the reasons for the addition to the child clearly, gently and kindly explain it to the child, get the child's understanding, let him know the reasons and benefits of the addition, only the child understands, can be well executed, without the child's approval, the arrangement of additional tasks may have the opposite effect.
Sixth, teach your child to manage his own time.
The last point, which I think is most important, is also a long-term task and cultivation. Teach the child to become the master of time, first guide well, give the child the freedom to manage his own time, let him arrange his own time, and see the effect.
If you want your child to be a slave to time, then you arrange it for your child every minute of every day. I believe that wise parents will definitely make smart choices.
There is also a key point here, that is, parents come to a change of attitude, stop urging, often pay attention to the child's progress, and mention less where the child has done enough.
You can try to let the child save time by trying to save it, so that the child can control it and mobilize the child's enthusiasm.
To change the child's rubbing behavior, parents should try to return the right to manage the progress and time of homework to the child, return the responsibility that the child should bear to the child, and then help the child establish good homework habits.
What are your thoughts on procrastinating your child's homework? You have confusion or incomprehension in this regard, you can leave a message in the comment area, cocoa mother to help you answer Oh!
This article is original by Coco Ma, welcome to pay attention, take you along with long knowledge!