01
Qian Zhongshu wrote in "The Siege": When I first met you, my heart had exploded into fireworks, and I needed to spend my life cleaning the ash stove.
This sentence is used to describe the love between Duan Yingjiu and Chen Hua, which is appropriate.
When Chen Hua knew Duan Yingjiu, he knew what kind of person Duan Yingjiu was, and he actually knew what kind of life would be like in the future when he married a national security officer.
He was ready for this, and thought he could change her slightly. Later, he found out that he had overestimated his endurance.
Chen Hua knew about his marriage to Ah Jiu, and he was destined to be the one who paid more. Family and children, more worrying about him, he has also been silently doing, never complaining about anything.
If their love also has a bank account, they have very few deposits in the account.
Having a meal together, chatting, watching a movie, or sitting together in the evening to soak your feet, all the daily routines that can be a little warm are very few.
What's more, even if you want to complain, quarrel, and make trouble, it must be two people.
The joys that want to be shared, the occasional complaint and heartache, the moments of his son's growth, all of them are not involved by Ah Jiu.
For so many years, in the face of a Ah Jiu who did not know when he would return home, Chen Hua's marriage seemed to have become a one-man show for him, and all the joys and sorrows were ignored.
He was so tired, not because he didn't love, but because he loved too much.
02
If you evaluate Duan Yingjiu from a professional point of view and professional quality, then the only answer is impeccable.
What kind of person is Duan Yingjiu? She is a very rigid person who devotes ninety percent of her energy to national security work.
The remaining ten percent was distributed to himself, Chen Hua, his son, and other family members. She couldn't even take care of herself, and there was naturally very little time and energy that she could give Chen Hua.
In fact, she knew in her heart that it was precisely because Chen Hua was her solid backing that she could rush to the front so unscrupulously.
But over time, she has forgotten that the other party also needs her response, even if it is only to say softly: You have worked hard.
But those soft and warm words, she never said. She always thought that as long as she turned back, her home would always be there.
She forgot that love also needs to be spoken, not to say the three words I love you, but to let the other party feel that you know the other party's hard work and effort, not your perfunctory attitude.
Therefore, when Chen Hua proposed divorce, she did not want to divorce, thinking that as long as she avoided talking about it, she would not be able to do it, and at this time she did not think about her own problems at all.
Does Chen Hua really want a divorce, of course not? In fact, his requirements are very low, he understands Ah Jiu's dedication and hard work, and he only wants to have her response and companionship occasionally.
Their love account, even if the opportunity to save money is not much, always have to be deposited in it, don't you, accumulate less into more, and wait until you need to spend it to have money to spend.
03
So, why did Duan Yingjiu later agree to divorce?
In fact, she is really hindsighted, perhaps because of her mother's nagging, or perhaps because of the colleague who was also asked for divorce by her partner in the same situation as her.
She realized with hindsight that in her love and marriage with Chen Hua, she was the one who was favored and cared for, and she always subconsciously forgot that Chen Hua also needed her company and care.
Not afraid of less, but not without, which she has never done in place.
At that moment, she understood the heartache and grievances of Chen Hua, who had always wanted to get her response, so she agreed to the divorce. Only then did Duan Yingjiu really change.
Two people who love each other, when it comes to talking about divorce, can calmly sit down and talk about each other's feelings. Perhaps this was also the first time that Ah Jiu had listened quietly, Chen Hua's heartache and grievances over the years.
But when they really divorced, their feelings and influence on each other did not disappear, but became more profound. Some people have been deeply rooted in their hearts, and it is not the end of divorced feelings.
Perhaps for Chen Hua, Ah Jiu is the ash furnace that he needs to clean with his whole life, and for Ah Jiu, Chen Hua's meaning to her is the same.
Fortunately, Ah Jiu had changed, and Chen Hua never wanted much. Just occasionally put a little in their love account, and save a little more, it is enough.