1
Some time ago, the news reported the news of a fire, and a sentence said by the husband after the fire triggered a heated discussion among netizens.
At that time, the fire was fierce, and although the fire was controlled in time, the whole house was in a mess, the cracked door of the wall was charred, and the bed was only a skeleton.
Ms. Meng was very sad, and her husband had to comfort her: "Isn't it just a house, it's a big deal to renovate, it's equivalent to us living in a new house." ”
Most netizens affirmed the attitude of Ms. Meng's husband and said that Ms. Meng was married to the right person. One of the most liked comments said:
My husband did the same, he said that if he scolded or reprimanded the related relatives because he lost an item, then he may lose more than a single item.
When things happen, blindly blaming not only can not recover the loss, but may intensify the contradiction and make the other half more annoyed.
The person who has made a big mistake is already very guilty and sad in his heart, and if the other party does not forgive and continues to blame and preach, then it may be worse on the basis of misfortune.
To blame an outlet means to hurt.
The killer of the relationship between husband and wife is sometimes not cheating or domestic violence, but you did not help me when I encountered difficulties, and you still accused me unforgivingly when I was in pain and sadness.
2
My friend Shin Shin shined on the street last year when she met a private equity firm handing out flyers, and the institutions looked very formal. So she listened to the propaganda and invested all the 300,000 yuan that her family was preparing to buy a house.
After returning home, Xinxin and her husband said that her husband immediately thought it was a scam, but Xinxin did not believe it. Half a month later, she found that the private equity firm had gone to the empty building.
Shin Shin felt that the sky was about to fall, and 300,000 was not a small amount for a small family that had just started its career. However, when she cried and called her husband, he did not have a word of reproach, but only comforted her vigorously.
"When the money is gone, we can make more money, you see that the business of the hotel is getting better and better now, and it is not bad at all." You should donate this money, and it is not that there is no hope of getting it back. ”
The husband never mentioned this matter again, which made Xinxin both touched and guilty.
The relationship between husband and wife often collapses at a certain moment of blame.
Blindly blaming the other party when he makes a mistake will not only not make him deeply aware of the mistake, but it is easier to arouse his aggressive desire and make him feel self-esteem frustrated. This kind of argument will only make the other party more and more distant from themselves.
3
There is a story about a couple who had a boy after marriage, but died because the mother neglected the boy to take drugs by mistake.
When the father saw his grief-stricken wife, he did not rebuke her, but put his arms around his wife and said to her, "Honey, I love you." ”
The departure of the child is already painful for the wife, the husband's accusation will only aggravate the wife's pain and will not play any other role, the child will not be resurrected from the dead, and the grief will not be reduced by one point because of the accusation.
If you can hug each other, warm each other, and encourage each other to get out of the predicament, it is the most rational choice.
There is a saying that goes like this:
In the most helpless and weak times, in the most depressed and depressed times, there is her (he) to hold up your chin, straighten your spine, command you to be strong, and accompany you around, and share your fate.
At that time, in addition to love, the feelings between you also had the righteousness of taking care of each other, the tacit understanding of not abandoning, and the unforgettable kindness.
The family is not a place to discuss right and wrong, we must put down the blame, do not dwell on right and wrong, and still spare each other.
◆ The child is sick, and the husband blames the wife for not taking good care;
◆ The husband is drunk at the party, and the wife scolds him for not being measured;
◆ Dishes are not washed clean, clothes are ironed unevenly, smelly socks are thrown away...
The accusations, complaints, and dissatisfactions that fill the married life every day unconsciously consume each other's patience and care, and the appreciation, admiration and passion that were once there disappear in the bumps and bumps.
So, when he makes a mistake, try to hug him and try to say it's okay.
After all, now that we are outside, we have swords and swords, please forgive and warm at home.
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