Accept children in order-sensitive periods

My child is more than four years old, and in the past six months, he has begun to do everything he has to do, and if he doesn't let him do it, his mood will fluctuate greatly, and he will even lose his temper and cry. Do you have the same time as me, whenever this time, you will feel the anger rise and helpless. In fact, at this stage of the child, unreasonable teasing and chaotic temper is normal, which indicates that the child has reached a sensitive period of order.

The so-called order sensitive period is a very important psychological growth period in the process of children's growth. Entering this sensitive period, children are very sensitive to order, and have very strict requirements for the order of things, the placement of items, the things they usually do, and the ownership of things. Once this order is broken, the child's heart will feel strongly uneasy and anxious. And because children are not good at expressing themselves and cannot express their feelings, they often cry, lose their temper, and make unreasonable noises to vent.

Montessori said: "The sensitive period of order begins with the birth of the child and lasts until the age of 6 or so, and among the nine sensitive periods of the child, the sense of order is the first, which affects the behavior and habits of the child throughout life." Therefore, parents, we must know how to respect and pay attention to the child's sense of order, and do not treat the child's behavior as unreasonable trouble, otherwise it will cause great harm to the child.

1. Respect the child's sense of order and accept the child's stubbornness

Montessori once said: "Order is for the child the need of life, and when it is satisfied, it produces real happiness, it is an adaptation to the outside world."

Although the child is young, he has an innate sense of order and believes that order is unchangeable, so as parents, we must respect the child's inner order and do not try to change him. For example, if a child likes to sit on the right side and likes to sit next to his father, let him stick to it. Otherwise, the child will feel uncomfortable and insecure.

2. Guide children to live in an orderly manner and cultivate good habits for children

Since children have an innate sense of order, and it is difficult to change this order, parents should make good use of this and guide their children to develop good living habits.

For example, if parents provide their children with a clean and regular living environment from an early age, they will establish such a sense of inner order and get used to a clean and standardized life. Once the living environment becomes chaotic, they will feel dissatisfied and want to change it.

For example, when the child eats for the first time, he is asked to wash his hands first, straighten it, and cannot shake it casually; From a young age, I was asked to go to bed early and get up early to insist on washing my feet before going to bed: from a young age, I was asked to tidy up my toys: from an early age, I was asked to be polite and not to say dirty words... Then, this innate sense of order will allow children to develop good living habits and stick to them for a long time.

3. Respect your child's attachment to the ownership of items

Many parents are afraid that their children will develop bad habits of selfishness and lack of friendship, so they will let their children share their food and toys. But this can easily destroy the child's sense of order and make the child dissatisfied. Because in the sensitive period of order, children have a strong sense of property rights, this thing is their own is their own, can not be shared with others casually. Once forced by their parents, they will be upset and even have a sense of distrust of their parents.

This is the so-called environmental influence on people, and the environment creates people. Once the child enters the sensitive period of order, he will become willful and stubborn, but parents must not take this as unreasonable trouble. Only by respecting the child and actively and correctly guiding the child can we let the child develop good behaviors and habits.