In 1966, Fu Lei and his wife Zhu Fumei tore a bed of earthen cloth sheets into long strips and hung them on a window frame to bid farewell to the world.
After years of constant criticism and being dragged to his knees for four days and three nights, this giant of Chinese translation and art critic looked at the uprooting of his carefully cultivated moon in the garden and the burning of all the letters in the bookcase, and he never wanted to bear such an insult again.
On the white cloth bag on the table were suicide notes and several envelopes: "Cash 53.3 yuan as our cremation fee; 55.29 yuan for september rent please pay on behalf of us... A 600 yuan deposit certificate was given to nanny Zhou Judi as a living expense during the transitional period. ”
All the money and things are neatly classified, for fear of owing someone else something, even the life of the nanny is taken into account.
The word "people" seems simple, and it is not easy to write well. If it is said that skimming represents the cause, the qi represents the people, and the overall charm represents the country, Fu Lei writes this word steadily.
In his life, he is worthy of his career, his friends, his country, and the only one who is ashamed is buried in the depths of his heart.
The same author's book, after reading Fu Lei's translation, and then reading someone else's, will always feel that something is missing.
John. In the first sentence of Christophe's opening chapter, someone translated it as: The river is rolling and shaking the back wall of the house.
Someone translated it as: The river behind the house roars and surges upwards.
Fu Lei translated it this way: The sound of the river is mighty, rising from behind the house.
The pattern is bold and self-explanatory.
He translated 33 translations in his lifetime, and there is no trace of translation except for the names of the articles themselves. All the translators who have read Fu Lei's translation are amazed not only by his translations.
However, Fu Lei deserves it!
He treats each of his translations as meticulously as a newborn baby, fearing that if one is not careful, the baby will be injured.
Before translating a book, he always had to read the original book four or five times and add some annotations. Not only do you have to understand it, but you must also have a clear understanding of the original Shen Yun style before you are willing to write.
The "Dictionary of Chinese" at hand has long been destroyed, and all foreign idioms or sayings, Fu Lei will find the most appropriate Chinese words to match.
Roman. Rowland's John. Christophe", Fu Lei's translation from 1936 until 1939. A few years later, when he reread the original again, he felt that his understanding was still not deep enough, so he spent two years retranslating it again.
"To do a good job in translation, we must change it again and again, and it is always difficult to put the text once and for all." Repeating it once, many people can tolerate it; repeating it many times, the challenge of human patience and meticulousness can be imagined. There is no best, only better.
He is not only strict with his own translations, but also treats the translations of others with no mercy.
At the National Conference on Translation Work, Fu Lei himself did not personally attend, but put forward a written opinion.
In his letter, he gave many examples of fallacies, many of which were owned by the participants. At this point, Fu Lei was offended by the anger of the public, and an old translator cried bitterly on the spot.
If you want to scold, you can cry, if you want to cry, you are afraid of something, I Fu Lei is not right about things.
Many people scolded Fu Lei for being arrogant, but he would often be dissatisfied with his translations and almost treat them with a provocative attitude.
Fu Lei often discussed the problems encountered in the translation with Qian Zhongshu and his wife, and also clearly recorded the original text in red pen.
He kept beating himself with a whip, and in order to make the translation lively and vivid, he read Lao She over and over again, and then went to nibble on others.
To do one thing to the extreme is to be a master. Since he chose a translation career, Fu Lei poured his life's efforts into it.
The French say, "No one can translate our masterpieces so eloquently." That's because no one wants to format and reset themselves again and again like Fu Lei.
When speaking for a friend, he does not weigh the status and power of the other party; when he insists on the right proposition, he does not count his previous grievances.
During his stay in France, Fu Lei had a good relationship with Liu Haisu, and after returning to China, Liu Haisu served as the principal of Shanghai Art College and hired Fu Lei as the director of the school office.
Zhang Xian, a mutual friend of the two, has heavy teaching tasks on weekdays, and was called home by Liu Haisu on two weekends. Saying that it was a meal, in fact, it was to ask Zhang Xian to copy the painting, and Liu Haisu himself went out to socialize, and when he returned, he signed his name on the painting.
Fu Lei was not accustomed to Liu Haisu's behavior, and often stood up to fight for Zhang Xian.
In the common circle of friends, if you can be unscrupulous because of who is proud of your career, such a friend will not be made.
He did not want to get too entangled with people and things that he was not accustomed to, and soon after, on the grounds of his mother's death, he offered his resignation to Liu Haisu.
This incident was mentioned in "Fu Lei's Self-Description": "Liu Haisu treats me very well personally, but treats others harshly, running a school is purely a shop style, I am very unaccustomed to it, and I resign when my mother dies." ”
A few years later, Zhang Xian died, and Fu Lei wrote a letter to Liu Haisu, asking him to prepare an exhibition of his will for Zhang Xian, trying to sell some works for Zhang Xian, and preparing some education fees for Zhang Xian's children. A letter passed, and the stone sank into the sea.
Fu Lei scolded, "Never interact with Liu Haisu." “
Since then, for more than 20 years, Fu Lei and Liu Haisu have never intersected again.
However, in 1957, Liu Haisu opposed the relocation of the East China Art College to Xi'an, and Fu Lei believed that Liu's proposition was right this time, so he strongly supported it, and he himself was implicated in this matter and became a rightist.
When Liu Haisu expressed guilt about the past because of this incident, Fu Lei, who has always loved more sincerely, heed: "Forget it."
Deep friendship is not about how often we interact and how close the interaction is, it is a recognition of personality, and it is a kind of courage to stand up at a critical moment.
Yang Dai once said: "Fu Lei's head is full of edges and corners, and he will offend people at every turn, coupled with his impatience, he can't stop rushing people." He knew that he was not good at circling the world, and that the 'cave' where he could settle down was only his own study. ”
People who are not good at maneuvering often have the purest side, and the so-called heart of a child is more or less the same.
Those who shout slogans the loudest may not be sincere; those who can speak what others dare not say must be true.
In 1939, Fu Lei, who resigned from the National Art College and returned to Shanghai, saw that Shanghai had been occupied by the Japanese army and set rules for himself: do not go to Huangpu in the east and Baidu Bridge in the north.
Because when he got there, he had to nod his head to the Japanese gendarmes, and such a nod was definitely another form of betrayal in Fu Lei's mind.
He closed the door and buried himself in translation.
However, how can a person who has a sense of responsibility and mission for the country, the nation, and society be able to bear not to send out his own inner cry?
In 1957, the People's Daily published an article encouraging "loud bangs." Fu Lei enthusiastically wrote a "Everyone's Wall, Everybody Tears Down," in which he made sharp criticisms of a small number of Party members.
This article, the words are pearlescent, is all his heartfelt voice, however, it has become his little braid.
A few months later, the storm suddenly changed, and major newspapers criticized him one after another. The articles he wrote became one of the incriminating evidence.
People who are skeptical and want to chase the truth are often out of step with the times. However, what really makes them out of place is often the sincerity of the emotions.
Fu Lei once wrote in the text: "Whether you cling to orthodoxy or cling to doctrine and dogma, intolerance will never bring peace, and the life under the heavens will not necessarily be stained." When a nation is unified in its thinking and heresy is extinct, that is, when its culture withers and dies. “
Deep hatred comes from deep love. Fu Lei, who was angry at King Kong, had too many ideas of his own for this country, and these ideas gradually paved the way for him to reach the end of the road.
To his friends, to his career, and to his country, Fu Lei always felt that his persistence was unashamed, but in a letter to Fu Cong, he once wrote: "Poor child, why is your childhood so similar to mine?" I also know that the setbacks you have suffered since childhood are not unhelpful to your achievements today, but my father has always made many very important mistakes..."
"Kids! child! child! What kind of hug do I have to hug you to show my remorse and love? ”
Reading "Fu Lei's Family Letter", we read a father's regret, a father's shame. Lou Shiyi, the author of the book's progenitor sequence, was once the vice president and deputy editor-in-chief of the People's Literature Publishing House, and became a close friend because of his years of cooperation with Fu Lei.
Recalling the past, Lou Shiyi sighed: "Fu Lei's children are cautious in front of him, and the atmosphere does not dare to come out, only when he goes out, they dare to laugh out loud." ”
How strict is this strict father?
How to speak, how to act, there must be no slightest excess, the slightest violation is light, anger, heavy beating. Even the direction and position of the hot water bottle in the home have strict requirements.
Qian Zhongshu and Yang Dai were Fu Lei's neighbors and often sat idly in his house and chatted. Yang Dai called Fu Lei "Old Fu", and in her heart, she often equated this title with "tiger".
Children are curious and like to listen to adults chat. Sometimes Fu Lei and Qian Zhongshu and his wife were chatting happily, and suddenly they would walk to the door and pull the door suddenly. Fu Cong, who was hiding behind the door, and his younger brother Fu Min were giggling with laughter, and when their father yelled at them, they slipped away and fled upstairs.
In order to protect the children, Zhu Fumei always scolded them a few times ahead of time, in fact, in order to block Fu Lei's anger, which pulled him back to the seat.
After the atmosphere in the living room slowly recovered a little, it wasn't long before Fu Lei suddenly went over and pulled the door shut. At this point, Zhu Meifu could not play a neutralizing role, because the two little ghost heads sat in the distance again and eavesdropped.
Fu Lei's reprimand, not to mention that the child was scolded and wanted to cry, even the adults in the living room felt that there was nowhere to put their hands and feet, and no one dared to go forward to persuade them.
When Fu Cong was practicing, fu Lei would roar when he slightly out of tune, and sometimes grabbed Fu Cong's head and slammed it against the wall.
Once, Fu Cong put "Water Margin" on the piano rack, while playing the piano while reading, fu Lei on the third floor heard something wrong, rushed to the piano, an ashtray smashed over, Fu Cong's nose suddenly flowed like blood.
With a few small things, Fu Cong could not escape the beating, and he was even tied to a pillar outside the house.
Until many years later, Fu Cong, who has become internationally famous, recalled the past and still sighed: "Daddy beat me really hurt." ”
Such pain is not only engraved in memory, but also burned in the character. Zhu Fumei once said that Fu Cong's personality was very similar to Fu Lei.
After studying abroad, Fu Cong often received family letters from Fu Lei. In the admonition between the lines, talk about art, talk about life, talk about love. The apology in my heart has been expressed a few times.
However, an arrogant father, a literati who never bowed his head, was able to say such an apologetic word in the face of his son, which showed the remorse in his heart.
Fu Lei put all his patience into his dedication to the cause of translation, and he was worthy of every translation, every word.
He also used all his righteousness in the treatment of his friends, and he was worthy of his conscience, his own personality;
He put the love in his heart to treat this country, and he can afford his own pursuits and his own world.
But sadly, like many successful people in this world, he is only sorry for his family and his children.
He left all the tenderness and beauty to the world, but he left a rough soul to his loved ones.
Yang Lan once wrote in "One Question, One World": "The real success is not how much money you have made or how high an official you have become, but one day when you remove all these identities, there are still people who are willing to smile at you around you." ”
Too many successful people, they live a wonderful enough life, but also full of sadness. Gained the whole world, but pushed the dearest people far away.
When chasing the world, if you can stop your own steps slightly, examine your surroundings, and hug your family, even if it is just a few warm words, you will add a lot of beauty.
And this is the ultimate harbor for each of us.
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【Text| Everyday Appearance】
Edit | Daniel Lee]
【Typography | Drizzle】
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