The more serious the mental attrition, the more bitter the life, 9 good habits to help you change your life

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The I Ching says: "One life, two fortunes, three feng shui, four accumulations of yin virtue and five readings." ”

From the data of Zhihu, the probability of reincarnation in China is about 18.3%, about 12.6% in developed countries, and about 17% in India.

In the face of the epidemic, the basic life at home has not been affected, while the faces of pseudo-democracy and pseudo-human rights abroad have been exposed one by one, and the charming veil of romance, fairness and equality shown in previous films has also been lifted, and there is no longer a sense of intoxicating atmosphere.

With an 18% probability, being able to reincarnate in China is already a manifestation of a good life, although it is not as rich as developed countries, but every life is respected, which is more important than anything.

China has become well-off in an all-round way, everyone's life is getting better, and its fate is also better.

And there is a kind of person who still has a very bitter life, that is, a person with serious internal friction.

The external environment no longer gives him suffering, but in his heart, he has not let go of himself, constantly falling into internal friction, constantly falling into bitter fate.

They always don't handle their relationship with themselves well, obviously nothing happens outside, and inside he has fought a lot of fights: laziness, concealment, procrastination, entanglement, anxiety...

If you want to get rid of internal friction and be a good life, the following 9 methods are shared with you to overcome fate together.

1, do not live in the eyes of others

Psychology has one

The "focus effect" refers to the tendency of humans to see themselves as the center of everything and intuitively overestimate how much attention others pay to us.

I have a colleague who is a victim of this mentality.

Usually speaking, her voice is so small that she can hardly hear it, and during the lunch break, she always sits quietly at her desk, rarely walking around, as if every public move will make her nervous.

Not to mention the public speaking, when it was her turn, she was eager to find a hole in the ground.

In this sensitivity and fear, career development is also limited, and life naturally becomes more and more narrow.

Jobs said: "

Life is about stringing pearls into threads.

”

Every step is important, to give birth to pearls, or to consume that brilliant self, to live in the eyes of others all the time? You should make a decision at this moment.

You have to understand that 99% of what happens to you has nothing to do with others.

Learn to care about your own feelings, let go of the expectation of others to pay attention, you can live the most comfortable, brilliant life.

2. Do not compare with others

Someone said, "

Life is tired, a small half comes from survival, a small half comes from comparison.

”

In the face of the information that follows the Internet, we see many bloggers living their dream lives, with luxury cars, mansions, and family happiness, and each one is like a rich flower in the world.

Compared with them, they seem to be as small as dust particles, have no sense of existence, their emotions explode at a little, and their mentality collapses as soon as they touch them.

But you compare thousands of comprehensive manifestations of life, and you always see what others have, but forget that no one's life is perfect.

The most valuable thing in the world is not material, but air, sunlight, family affection and other things that cannot be measured in money, and you have all of them.

Lose yourself in comparison, when you are a child, than your grades; when you grow up, you are better than love; when you have a family, you are better than your children. Spend your whole life in comparison, rather than living comfortably from the heart, just asking for trouble.

Hemingway said: "Superior to others, not noble, the real nobility should be superior to the past self."

”

Learn to focus your attention and love on yourself, focus on improving yourself, stronger than yesterday's self, and you are proud.

3, do not stay in the past

Zeng Guofan's best words of the founding world: "Things come to conform, the future is not welcomed, the present is not complicated, and the past is not in love." ”

When there are inevitably regrets and regrets in life, things that have happened in the past, since we are powerless to change, we learn to surrender and accept the past that has already happened.

Understand that what you lose may not belong to you in the first place.

Timely reflection can help us learn lessons, but long-term regret can make people emotionally broken and life difficult.

Let go of ourselves, forgive ourselves, there are some things that we can't control.

People will come and go; opportunities will come and go; opportunities will arise first, and there will be seconds.

Instead of dwelling on the past that cannot be changed, it is better to devote your energy to the present to decide whether the future can be left without regrets.

4) There is no perfectionism in the moment

Perfectionists always do things perfectly, and we also want to do something to the standard of perfection.

There's nothing wrong with having high demands on yourself, but you need to know that not everything can be perfect.

A dinner party was held, the program was arranged, the invited guests arrived as scheduled, the atmosphere was lively, the whole event was a complete success, and everyone was very satisfied.

This is the perfect standard that can be achieved artificially.

But if you ask yourself to smile all day and not lose your temper on any occasion, you are doomed to live a very tired life.

There's a saying: "

We desperately strive for perfection, but we forget that it is perfection that is made precisely because of imperfection.

”

Learn to relax and let yourself catch your breath,

Having a beautiful mood, a simple state of mind, a feeling of happiness, even if it is not perfect, is the most beautiful.

5. Don't think too much about it

Two days ago, an article appeared on the hot search, the title was "Why are you so tired, or can't make money?" ”

This sentence speaks to everyone's voice, everyone has to work at least 8 hours a day, but the proportion of wage growth and housing prices are far from linked.

So I began to be anxious and whimsical, thinking that I could not buy a house in my lifetime, and my annual salary of 200,000 was out of reach.

Staying in this anxious state, thinking about it, but after work, always brushing vibrato, eating hot pot, and betting time on things that are not helpful for their own growth, naturally unable to improve their skills and increase income.

Mr. Yang Dai once famously said: "Your problem is that you read too little and think too much."

Worrying about things that are of no benefit to them is like worrying about the sky of the country of Berry.

Excessive thought will only bind you and make you shy about what you do, not really acting toward the goal.

There is only one way to cure excessive thoughts, and that is action.

Thinking too much is all questions, and only when you do it can you have an answer.

6, not to be kidnapped by negative emotions

The Law of Attraction tells us that positive energy is hundreds of times more negative energy than negative energy.

Optimistic people, full of hope for life, always believe that they can overcome the challenges and difficulties in life, and the result is that the universe rewards you with wealth beyond your ability.

Negative people, who are defeated by fear in their heads at the outset, are always hesitant about things, and consume precious daily time in worry.

In the long run, the universe rewards you with negative things, such as complaints, illness, and unemployment.

George Washington said: "All harmony, health, success and happiness are born and caused by optimism and upward hope." ”

Stop negative thoughts, stay away from negative circles of friends, and use positive energy to attract wealth that is on the same frequency as you.

7. Don't set limits for yourself

If Musk believes that it takes $63 million to launch a rocket, he will not innovate, using first principles to speculate that the rocket parts are recyclable, and finally spend only $2 million to launch the rocket.

When others are innovating by analogy, Musk can always subvert ideas and create new business miracles, like SpaceX, the first private space exploration company, and Tesla, the first electric car company.

He changed the world on his own, and he had a greater goal: to help 1 million people colonize Mars in his lifetime.

If you don't dare to think about it, how dare you take the first step to create a new world.

Someone always asks, "Can you still study abroad at the age of 30?" ”

"Can you still learn to dance at the age of 35?"

"Is it too late to change careers at the age of 40?"

Ren Zhengfei only started his business at the age of 43, but he made Huawei 650 billion yuan, which is the pride of every Chinese.

When Cao Dewang was a child, his family was poor, and he filled his hunger with steamed buns made of peanut shells, but he opened the company to the United States and became China's "first good".

What limits us is not age, resources, and environment, but psychological suggestions, don't set limits on yourself, there is no impossible in life, and believe that everything can become possible.

8, no entanglement, no delay

Some people want to learn to write, not to inquire about the way to monetize writing and the future development, but always struggle with whether to write.

As a result, a week has passed, a month has passed, half a year has passed, or in the struggle and procrastination, do not know whether to write, even if you want to write, but also delayed the delay in writing.

And the person who started writing as early as 6 months ago already has tens of thousands of fans on social platforms and has obtained a stable income.

Entanglement and procrastination are the easiest things in the world to crush a person's morale.

Don't wait until you have everything in place to think about action, and don't wait until the environment is right before you start.

When you do it, you will defeat 50% of your opponents.

Take action, only to know where the problem is, tangled and do not know how to start, delay and wait for the opportunity, will only make people wasted.

9. Don't attack yourself

People who love self-aggression are always critical of themselves and often fall into feelings of guilt, shame, and frustration.

It is not known that these emotions are at the bottom of the Hawkins energy scale.

Especially guilt and shame, energy levels are 30 and 20, people caught in this emotion, often self-denial, closure, serious damage to physical and mental health, has been close to death.

Some people have a "savior plot" in love, and in psychology, the savior plot is the most romantic and poetic plot, but this often makes people take responsibility for what happens around them, develop a guilty mentality, and damage their health.

Know that there are many things that we can't control, and we don't have to blame ourselves for it, and we are caught up in long-term regrets.

The most important compulsory course in life is to learn to accept yourself and love yourself.

In the best-selling book "Meeting the Unknown Self", it is said: "The true self of human beings is love, joy, and peace." ”

Be aware of your body and emotions, connect with your true self, find love, joy and peace, reduce internal friction, live a beautiful self, and everyone can become a rich person.

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