"The Metamorphosis of Youth": Mother's overprotectiveness makes her become a "red panda"

Pixar's new work "The Metamorphosis of Youth" received many positive reviews after it was released online. The audience said: Too poking at me! What is the plot that makes everyone feel this way?

"It's just happening to my family."

The protagonist of the movie, Meimei, is a Chinese girl who has just entered adolescence.

She studies hard, believes that "love to fight to win", also has to write homework on the bus, and strives for full marks in the door homework; she is diligent and thrifty, doing all kinds of housework after returning home, sweeping the yard and making dumplings; she is versatile, and when her classmates practice musical instruments together, she can "show her hand" in front of others. In life, she may be a typical "other person's child", out of reach.

But her mother makes us feel more "kind", because what she has done has made many netizens call out: This is simply my mother!

If Meimei comes home 10 minutes late, her mother will hold her face, check whether she is injured, ask her what is wrong, whether she is hungry, and even directly take out a plate of buns and stuff it into Meimei's mouth; Meimei's body is a little uncomfortable, her mother is nervous as if the sky is about to collapse, and she also runs to school, puts on sunglasses and hides behind a tree, just to see Meimei; Meimei's friends do not have good grades than her, and her mother does not let her play with these "no three or four" friends; Her mother sees the notebook on the floor of Meimei's room, picks it up and opens it. Seeing The manga drawn by Mimi and getting along with boys, she went directly to the shop where the boy worked and warned him to stay away from his daughter...

Seeing this, how many people already feel suffocated?

Is your family "overprotective" from your children?

Of course, meimei mother, like many mothers in many families, must have been for the good of her children and hoped to protect her. But are these "protections" really appropriate?

In psychologists' classic definition of parenting styles, there is a dimension called "overprotection", which, as the name suggests, is that parents are overprotective of their children.

If you want to know whether parents are overprotective of themselves, you can refer to the following entries, the more these behaviors made by parents, the more excessive protection is; if you are already a parent, you can let your children evaluate, because parents' views and children's perspectives are often different.

1. The parent doesn't allow me to do something that other children can do because they're afraid I'm going to have an accident.

2. My parents demand that I have to explain to them what I have done outside when I get home.

3. The parent always decides what I should wear or dress up.

4. I feel that my parent's fear of my possible accident is exaggerated and excessive.

5. My parents have strict restrictions on what I can and should not do and never give in.

6. I feel like my parent interfered with any one thing I do.

7. My parents often allow me to go where I like to go without worrying too much.

8. I hope my parents don't worry too much about what I'm doing.

How, in your home, how many of these "overprotective" phenomena are there?

"I'm sorry parents, I'm really useless..."

Will overprotected children be as obedient as their parents would like and grow up in a greenhouse?

Unfortunately, probably not.

Under the overprotective of her mother, Meimei gradually became another mother. As time went on, her tendency to conform to her mother's ideas became more and more apparent. For example, when Mimi paints herself and the boy she has a crush on, what she says to herself is, "What the hell are you perverting?" Why paint those terrible, bad things? She even slapped herself in the mirror and cried, "I'm sorry Mom."

Studies have found that overprotective parenting is mostly negatively correlated with children's self-esteem, that is, the more parents overprotect their children, the more children will feel useless. Proper protection and support can help children be more confident, but if parents are too worried and overly interfering, it seems to imply that: I don't believe you can do a good job, so I want to make these decisions for you and do these things for you. Therefore, most of the children who are overprotected will have to bow their heads and wear out their self-esteem in obedience.

What happens to children with weaker and weaker self-esteem?

In the movie, Meimei's suppression of herself makes her become a red panda. Whenever she is emotional, she will transform, because she does not allow herself to have such emotions and behaviors, so she has to become a red panda to bear the part of her unwillingness to accept herself.

In reality, although children cannot become a red panda, they may also "split" into two selves in their hearts, one is a strict and seemingly "perfect" self like their parents; and the other is a repressed, in fact, very normal desired self, if pressed for too long, this part of the desire of their own may eventually "erupt".

Reconciling with home is also reconciling with oneself

After learning that Meimei would turn into a red panda, her mother locked her up at home in order to protect her, and talked about "not letting people see her like this" behind her back, which made her think that the red panda was very humiliating. But unexpectedly, her classmates are very fond of red pandas. Therefore, even though the family could have helped Meimei seal the red panda, Meimei still refused the seal.

This act undoubtedly angered my mother. Then, the mother turned into a red panda, and this red panda was huge and angry, more powerful than all the other red pandas in the family, and could destroy a building at will. In order to prevent her mother from destroying the entire city, the entire family of red pandas took action, hoping to stop her.

In the process, Meimei meets her young mother, who has a fragile and crying side like her. When she saw her mother crying and saying, "I will never be good enough for her (Meimei Grandmother)," Meimei finally knew why her mother was doing this to herself now, because the parenting style would also be passed on from generation to generation. At this moment, she reconciled with her mother and said to her mother, "I know that feeling."

And this kind of reconciliation is also a reconciliation between the United States and herself. In the end, she successfully chose to coexist with the red panda and accepted this imperfect and emotional part of herself.

So, if you're the parent who overprotects your child, pause for a moment and think about why you're doing it, for the sake of your child, or because of your former self? If you are the child who is overprotected, don't rush to resent the parents, perhaps, understanding them is the sign of your true growth.

I wish everyone reconciliation with themselves and with their families.

Yin Jinxiu Source: China Youth Daily

Source: China Youth Daily client