The pigeon that flew away many years ago, you will still habitually worry about it for a moment on every rainy dusk, after all, all the nostalgia stems from the change of the world and no longer owns. I don't know how long it will take you to understand that the sincere silence of the past is far more powerful than the remembrance.
by Ruiqi Zhang
Draft 499
I don't know if you have a sudden sadness at some point? I remember once at a party, a friend told me about a distant relative of hers, saying that her cousin finally worked at a more enviable company this year, and the good people had stabilized not long ago.
I thought it was a story of hard work, but when my friend finished, I was silent for a long time.
Her cousin is the only child in the family, which is the kind that combines thousands of pets, but the family conditions are not very rich, so her aunt has been working and reading with her when she first remembers.
At that time, everyone's conditions were very difficult, and her aunt was even more, on the one hand, the child's schooling could not be delayed, and the same thing that should be learned could not be left behind, on the other hand, the tuition fee was high. Therefore, the aunt had to make breakfast for his cousin every morning, send him to school, and then go to work, do several jobs a day, until the cousin went to pick him up from school at ten o'clock, and also made a supper for him to ensure that nutrition could keep up.
For many years she persisted like this, doing all the dirty work, as long as she could get her children into a good school. Sure enough, the cousin did not disappoint the family, the college entrance examination was admitted to a good university with excellent results, at that time, all the people in the family came to congratulate.
Later, the tuition fees and other expenses of the university were gradually increased, and the aunt could only work harder to ensure the stability of the cousin's expenses. I remember that in the year of graduate school, my aunt began to work until late at night almost at dawn, and she was always frugal and frugal, just so that she could save money for her cousin to study.
It was hard to stay up until my cousin graduated, found a good job, and slowly stabilized. Logically, it is also a bittersweet, and when it is time to retire, it is time to enjoy your own life.
When it came to the age of talking about marriage and marriage, talking about an object and wanting to buy a suite together in the city where she worked, the aunt took out all her old books and gave them to her son, saying that she was helping her son to share the pressure of life...
Hearing this, I was silent for a long time, and later, every time I thought about this matter, there was always a little sadness in my heart. That kind of sadness may be because other people's lives are not easy, but most of them are also lamenting the difficulties of their own lives.
We often say: raise children to prevent aging, raise children to prevent aging. But in the end, it is not known whether it is to raise children to prevent aging, or to grow old because of children. When my child was born, the first thing I thought was that one day he would grow up and start a family. Therefore, the source of each beginning, whether you can marry a daughter-in-law, whether you have the ability to save enough for a down payment in the future... All kinds of things began to appear in the mind, and when these things, although distant, but seemed to be bound to happen, began to have some signs, people had an indescribable sense of sadness and powerlessness.
Later, when I told this story to my friends around me, they all said that in fact, everyone did not want to base their happiness on squeezing their parents, but if they only relied on their own efforts, those so-called poems and distant places would not know when to struggle. At this time, we can't help but ask for support from above, and these are actually things that we don't want to see.
And so, that feeling of sadness and powerlessness spread among us...
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About the author: Da Miao, working hard to live in a small southern town,
Beware of dream-chasing, freelance writers.
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