I think it has to do with how much men and women pay for their families after marriage.
Women are often "in-lord" roles after marriage, and this role is difficult: need to bring children, do housework, need to reconcile interpersonal relationships between family members, need to maintain the relationship between husband and wife.
But "inside the Lord" means that a lot of giving is not valued, even taken for granted, you work hard to manage the housework, but in the eyes of outsiders, the husband outside the Lord is harder than you.
Men's efforts are often before marriage, and after marriage, they will be much worse than before.
They have a "hunter mentality", and they often do not hesitate to pay before marriage, will pay a lot, say a lot of sweet words, and spend time on the management of feelings, and will give you gifts on holidays. He will show his best, make himself a winner in the hunting process, and satisfy his desire to conquer.
But once married, a lot of men change. Because they have got you, marriage is what they think is the end, so they are more inclined to enter a "state of emotional stability", so they will weaken their own efforts in the relationship, you will feel his particularly obvious changes, disappointed in him.
And women's efforts are after marriage.
Because women will be very tolerant, although they may be disappointed in marriage, they often do not divorce, especially after having children, many women will make a lot of sacrifices for children.
When the partner gradually does not participate in the family, they will take up the heavy responsibilities of the family alone, take care of the housework, take care of the children alone, and even take care of the in-laws, and some people will take on the burden of supporting the family if the husband is relatively poor, while supporting the family and taking care of the family.
With such a high-intensity effort, there is no one around to support him, and the sense of exhaustion will increase and the confidence in the marriage will be lost.
In fact, a good marriage is a "equal pay" relationship.
Whether it is before marriage or after marriage, if two people have the sense of giving, each doing their own role, assuming their own responsibilities, the relationship will be happy.
When one party does not fulfill its responsibilities and does not want to pay, and the relationship between husband and wife is therefore indifferent, the best solution is not divorce or quarrel, but to cultivate a husband and wife community, establish a mechanism for both parties to pay, and guide the other party to invest more in the family, so that the emotional account of the marriage will continue to appreciate, and the marriage will move in the direction of happiness.