-01-
Have you ever treated your child that way?
Once met a father and son on the subway, both of them have seats, the father looked down at the mobile phone, the little boy was three or four years old, at first he sat quietly, calling his father from time to time, looking bored, seeking attention.
But the dad didn't pay much attention to him. There is a sentence that does not reply to him, or simply impatiently said:
"Sit still and don't move, where are so many words!"
The little boy felt bored, and began to pull and pull at his father, and with great strength, he pulled his father in pain, and his father directly yelled at him:
"What are you doing?" Don't worry! ”
The little boy quickly blushed and slapped his father without hesitation. At this time, Dad was also angry and directly pushed him.
The little boy did not sit still and fell directly to the ground, like an angry little lion, scratching and biting at his father, crying and making a lot of noise, and his round eyes were full of anger.
The father hid and tried to tie the boy's hand, but in the middle of the time, the little boy bit his hand, howled in pain, and gave his son a few slaps.
The little boy was completely out of control, the two fought each other, punched and kicked in his father's arms, and the people on the subway avoided each other, not knowing what to persuade the two fathers and sons.
The farce ended in both sides, both panting and saying hurtful words to each other. People around me talked a lot.
It's just that people always see others clearly, and they often can't control their emotions when they put themselves on themselves. Looking back, have we ever treated our children with such a blunt and impatient attitude?
When their emotions are hurt and they fight back against us with anger and hatred, we will wonder how this child's temper is so bad.
But have we reflected on our previous neglect of our children, and have we reviewed whether our patience is insufficient?
Can grumpy and impatient parents, children, still expect to be gentle as sheep? It is not an exaggeration to say that parents are the best teachers for children. Parents themselves are not good at emotional management, can they still ask their children?
Children's emotions are actually very satisfying, but what they want is definitely not our impatience.
-02-
Why do children lose their temper?
We often feel that children are making unreasonable trouble, but calm down and think about it, it is estimated that they are also quite aggrieved. Who would start throwing a tantrum inexplicably? Any emotion has a cause, as do adults, and so do children. Children who suddenly become angry are likely to be due to these reasons:
Physical discomfort
Many times, a child's tantrum may be due to physical discomfort. Tired, sleepy, stomach pain or dizziness, some physical discomfort will make the child's emotions more sensitive.
Requirements are ignored
Playing with children at home, but they are brushing their mobile phones; taking their children out to play, they are still brushing mobile phones. The child encountered a problem, and the signals that came to ask for help again and again were blocked by us. Lack of emotional attention and care is often the most important cause of children's tantrums.
There is a sample
"Sears Intimate Parenting" once mentioned that a parent who loves to lose his temper will often end up educating the child to become a person who loves to lose his temper. Children always like to imitate the words and deeds of their parents, parents are grumpy, and the child's personality will not be too gentle. In the face of the sudden small temper, how to correctly guide and treat us as parents is particularly important.
-03-
The countermeasure is simple, there is only one
When the child's temper is getting worse and worse, there is only one way to crack it, that is, patience, if not, then be patient.
When the child is young, even if it is just a roadside ant, he may have a great interest, crouching over there with a small stick to poke and play.
However, can we, who are accustomed to the strangeness of the world, appreciate the busyness of these ants and the fun of children? Can you calmly stop your hurried steps and wait for them to stand up satisfactorily?
Have we all ever felt that this is not interesting, urging children to do what we plan? As a result, the child is not happy and begins to make trouble, but we feel that the child is unreasonable.
After a busy and hard day, I came home impatient with everything, and even basic communication was cold. The child has a little need, and instead of satisfying it, we also think she is making a fuss and reprimanding her. Although there will always be regret and embarrassment afterwards, however, the damage has been caused.
Children, always the most sensitive, they will always imitate involuntarily, regardless of right or wrong acceptance. When her way of behaving became a habit, into the children in our eyes who were angry, who liked to shout, and threw things at the slightest displeasure, we labeled them as "bad-tempered children." For children, this is not fair.
Each child's personality is different, and when they lose their temper, the ways and methods we need to carry out will be different, but the most basic thing is patience.
Source: The picture and text come from the network, invaded and deleted.
EDIT: Xiao Huang