(Draft: He Jingyi)
Your parents are still stubborn, but you are showing off poetry and far away
There are always some people who live an invincible life, you live a glamorous life, but you can't see behind you, silently supporting your parents, in order to make you live a better life, you are still whispering to the world.
Some time ago, chatting with friends, he accompanied a younger brother on a trip in Hokkaido, Japan. I asked him if he had a good time. He told me that he and his brother were not the same person, so the journey was not very pleasant.
He told me carefully that my brother was pestering his parents to go to Japan to play, and his mother was not at ease, so he invited my friend to follow my brother.
His younger brother, whose family is not very wealthy, has just gone to college and does not have the ability to earn money on his own, but he has the ability to spend money. Take a small thing, Japan is very expensive, a piece of cantaloupe costs about 30 yuan.
A friend asked me, "Can you identify with a child who can't earn money yet, that his family is not very rich, that he doesn't blink just because he's thirsty, that he refuses to buy water, but eats three pieces of cantaloupe in one go?" ”
This child reminds me of a very impressive sentence: Parents are still stubborn, but you are showing off poetry and far away.
There are quite a few such people around.
Another friend of mine, whose family conditions are very average, lives a very "high".
She felt that the unit box lunch was difficult to eat, and went out to the restaurant at noon every day, and she must order a cup of milk tea for more than ten yuan in the afternoon. Go out shopping with her, and she always pulls me to eat popular and expensive restaurants. Traveling with her, she has always bought and bought all kinds of food and souvenirs with inflated prices in the scenic spots, spending money like flowing water. Stinky tofu wasn't tasty, she tasted a piece, spit it out, frowned in disgust, and threw it away.
I dare not advise her not to spend too much money. Every time she tried to persuade her, she squinted her eyes in disbelief, pulled out her two famous words, and opened her mouth with a straight face.
The first sentence, "Girls, be rich"; the second sentence, "When you come out to play, you must be happy, don't care too much about money." "It seems that if I advise her to save properly, it seems that I am too picky and too stingy."
I thought she must be well-off until I went to her house once. She lived in a house on the outskirts of the city, old and damp, narrow and small, from the first and second floors, to a very steep staircase.
Her grandmother, dressed in her high school uniform coat, sat at home picking vegetables. She asked her grandmother why she didn't play cards, and the old man said: I lost dozens of dollars in these two days, and I am not happy to go today.
I borrowed their bathroom, and my grandmother did not forget to tell me to flush with the water that washed the mop in the bucket, don't press the button, the water is rushing, and it is a waste of money.
It is such a frugal old man, but he gives his savings from selling vegetables piece by piece to his granddaughter and allows her granddaughter to squander.
At noon with her father and mother to eat, her father said that he did not expect her to earn money to support the family, the little salary she earned, to give herself food and clothing.
Later, the friend asked me to go on a trip for the holidays and mentioned to me that it was cold to commute in the winter, and she was ready to buy a car, and the family agreed to buy it for her. Hearing this, I could only laugh and laugh, not knowing what to respond to.
There's a joke that goes something like, "I see money as dung, and my parents see me like a septic tank." ”
Many people in my generation are like this.
Some time ago, the Internet discussed whether children should be poor or rich, and advocates of rich support asked: Boys should be poor? How much of a vendetta do your children have with you?
I would also like to ask the children who have squandered their parents' hard-earned money: Do children want to be rich? How much money do your parents owe you?
I know a boy who owes his parents all his expenses from college to work. The money spent on occasional travel is also earned by working part-time. After working, he took a lump sum of money from his monthly salary to repay his parents.
When a child becomes an adult, parents have no obligation to raise children, and there is no need to discuss the topic of poor and rich support. But the reality is that many people get married and let their parents take the mortgage.
If you, like me, came from an ordinary family, then you should know very well that every penny your parents earn is not easy.
When your parents are sweating profusely in the scorching sun, when your parents are engaged in mental work in a small cubicle, you consume their day's salary at a big meal, will you really not have a trace of guilt?
When parents are yelled at by the leader, when parents are called by customers to drink, you are calling friends to lead companions and live a dashing life, really will not be unbearable?
When you wear a brand that can be named, a pair of shoes costs thousands of pieces, but your parents are wearing old shoes that you eliminated, they don't understand the brand you are talking about, and you laugh at their backwardness.
When you feel that your knowledge, literacy, and vision are far beyond your parents, so you hate your parents for "not seeing the world", have you ever thought that in fact, it is your parents who carry you to a higher place, so that you have the opportunity to see the bigger world?
You live an invincible life, you live a glamorous life, but you can't see behind you, silently supporting your parents, in order to make you live a better life, you are still whispering to the world.
Don't think of your parents when you're short of money, they're not ATMs, they have temperature on their chests, they have feelings in their hearts.
——Mom and Dad love us, and it is not easy to love.
In the distance, call your mother, say thank you to your mother is not shameful; around, remember to go home to eat, if you can buy a small gift, I believe that my mother will be nagging for a long time... Don't forget, ask your father well.
Many parents unknowingly raise white-eyed wolves.
On Sunday night, when the meal was already on the table, I called out to my daughter, "Eat." "Wait a minute," she replied.
I ate first. A few minutes later, my daughter came over, glanced at the table, and asked, "What about my meal?" This was accompanied by a look of resentment and dissatisfaction.
I was shocked. Her expression, her questioning, was clearly telling me: You should serve me a good meal, why don't you serve me rice?
7-year-old she has a good pair of hands, she can obviously serve her own food, why do you think I should take it for granted to serve her?
I immediately found the reason. Although I have been warning myself not to do too much for my children and let them learn to take responsibility for themselves, I still, like many mothers, unconsciously do more for my children.
I used to serve her food, so much so that she thought that the meal was something my mother should do for her, so instead of appreciating that I had been serving her, she was dissatisfied because she hadn't served her today. Yeah, since it's what moms should do, how can she be grateful?
I realized that this was fueling my daughter's "unashamed feeling" that someone felt that someone else owed him something or that someone else had to give him special treatment. People with this tendency think that others (especially people close to them) should give him what they want, and others give it, he feels that it is what people should do, he is not grateful; others do not give, he thinks that others are too undeserving, so he is dissatisfied and resentful.
People who feel unashamedly and strongly may become a "white-eyed wolf".
I've seen many parents unconsciously breeding white-eyed wolves. They do too much for their children, on the way to school or school, most of the children's school bags are carried by their parents, and the children are at ease to walk empty-handed; clothes come to stretch out their hands and open their mouths, do not have to do housework, just do a good job of studying; material enjoyment is overly satisfied, many primary school students have their own mobile phones and computers...
Today he thinks you should carry a school bag and buy a mobile phone for him, tomorrow he will think that you should find a job for him, buy a car, buy a house, and if one day you can't give him what he wants, he will resent.
Teach children how important it is to be responsible and grateful! A child who knows how to be grateful, he will appreciate what others have done for him, cherish everything he has received, and feel that it is both happy and happy to have everything in front of him.
Parents should remember: if you do not want to raise your child to become a "white-eyed wolf", then do not do too much for your child, do not promote your child's sense of unashamed feeling, and teach your child to know how to be grateful.
(Source: Network)
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