"Mom, I have pressure money to buy one", at this time, the parents' reaction is very important
Properly satisfying a child's wishes is not a doting on a child
Rather, it is to respect the inner needs of children, and parents must not only care about suppressing children and finally causing psychological harm to children
- Caption
The other day, I took my sister's children to the mall
As a result, this little guy looked at a very beautiful car model, and I looked straight at the child's small eyes
Obviously I liked it very much, so I said
"Uncle help you buy, take it quickly"
But the little guy replied sensibly
"I don't want it, this is too expensive"
The child is only 4 years old, and I was really surprised by such a performance
So I went home and told my sister about it and asked her
"Xiao Bao is so sensible now?"
My sister told me that recently, just after the New Year, the child himself had a pressure on the old age
So she and her brother-in-law were afraid of what the child wanted, so they discussed that they must reject the child fiercely
Just a few days ago, the little nephew asked his sister
"Mom, I can buy a model car with the money I can use."
As a result, his sister rejected him without saying a word, and told him that the car model was too expensive for children to buy
Thinking about my nephew's eager but pretentiously strong eyes at that time, my heart instantly became very sour
Seriously, the holidays are a great opportunity for children to fulfill their wishes
So when the child wants to buy something, but is ruthlessly rejected by the parents
It will not only hurt their feelings, but also leave them with psychological shadows
As parents, we must understand
When your child has shopping needs, your attitude has a huge impact on your child's physical and mental health
The following 3 points, I hope all parents can take a look
01
Today you reject children
Tomorrow the child will make up for it with a lifetime
Not long ago, I saw such a question on the Zhihu Network
"What I lacked when I was a child, now I desperately want to make up for myself, am I sick?"
According to this netizen, her parents have been very harsh on her since she was a child, and they like to make it up when they dress
He often said to her: "It won't take long to buy it, you will grow up immediately"
So her clothes are often worn by relatives and children around her, and even her socks are often patched
This led to her feeling very inferior, and when she grew up, her favorite thing to buy was socks
It had even reached the point of madness, but no matter how much she bought, every time she went out, she was still afraid of others looking at her feet
The feeling of embarrassment caused by a hole in her socks in her childhood has always plagued her
The netizen's experience has resonated with many people, and many people have left messages to answer
"I too, I couldn't get it when I was a kid, and when I grew up, I desperately tried to make up for myself"
"When I was a child, I wanted a dress, but my mother didn't buy it, and when I grew up, I really bought a skirt when I saw it, and I bought a lot of wardrobes."
Indeed, in life
We also often see some people, who are already very old next year, but still like to buy all kinds of small toys and gadgets
In fact, it is because they did not get it when they were young
Psychology defines such behavior as "childhood retaliatory compensation", which means that a person's childhood is not satisfied
When they grow up, they will become obsessed with their hearts and will continue to make up for themselves
As a parent, within the scope of your ability, you must learn to respect your child's ideas and needs, and try to let him be satisfied
If the conditions do not allow it, it is also necessary to explain it to the child
And don't rudely choose to refuse
02
Today you blindly satisfy the child
Tomorrow the child's life will become a bottomless black hole
It's too much to say
Always reject the child, the child is prone to psychological deficiencies
On the contrary, if you always satisfy the child, it will actually cause a bad impact on the child
When parents educate their children, they must pay attention to grasping the measure
I have a relative who was very old and married
He was in his forties when he gave birth to his son, so although his life was not rich
But for children, it is obedient
The child liked the balance car, and he immediately went to the supermarket to buy the best one
The kid wants a drone, and he immediately goes online to order one of the coolest ones
Not to mention the children's usual food and clothing, it must be to buy the best and most expensive for the child
As a result, the child is now a teenager and doesn't even tie his shoelaces
The most I talked to my parents was to ask for money to buy things
Some people say that the best way to ruin a child is actually very simple, that is, you give what he wants
I have seen such a news on the Internet
A pair of parents who bought a house for their son and got married not only spent their life savings
It also carried an additional loan of 300,000 yuan
However, a few days before the marriage, the woman suddenly asked for more than 60,000 yuan
At this time, the old two mouths really can't take it out
And their son actually said to his parents at this time
"If you can't come up with the money, you'll die."
In the end, the desperate mother really chose to jump off the building
Obviously, he is a child who has been pampered and raised in every way, but when he grows up, he does not know how to sympathize with his parents at all
He even forced his parents to die for his own selfish desires
Raising such a child, it is really better to buy a piece of "char siu"
Professor Li Meijin, a famous parenting expert, once said that if you continue to obey your children from a young age
Then their desires will become bigger and bigger, and at the age of 3, they may only cry for things
When they are in their teens and twenties, they will argue with you and even do something
In the end, not only ruin your child's life, but also your own family
Remember that parents' needs for their children must be met according to their ability
Don't spoil your child too much
03
When children have a need to shop, parents are right to do so
The great painter Mr. Feng Zikai once said
Children are always emotionally rich, but not much sanity
They have all kinds of desires, but they can't control themselves very well
Therefore, as a parent, at this time, you must know how to guide your children
When your child has shopping needs, parents must pay attention to the following 2 points
Embrace your child's needs and make good rules
It's that people will have what they want
Children are naturally no exception, as parents, we must learn to accept the various needs of children and face them squarely
In addition, make good rules for your child
For example, make a shopping list in advance
In "Peppa Pig", every time Mother Pig takes Paige and George to the supermarket, she will make a shopping list in advance
So after arriving at the supermarket, the kids wanted something extra
Mom would justifiably reject them
And children will not be hurt by this
Money education, cultivate children's consumption concept
Many parents always feel that their children are still young, and they are reluctant to raise money to their children
As a result, children will lack concept of money, and thus become extravagant and unrestrained when spending money
In fact, parents should educate their children about money from an early age
Let the child know where the money comes from, so as to help the child establish a rational view of consumption from an early age
Well, that's it for today, see you next time.