What should I do if my child is unwilling to talk to his parents?
Sometimes, we want to hear more about our children's experiences, or their feelings and thoughts. However, it is often found that children do not want to talk to us. It could be that there is no positive emotional response between the parent and the child for various reasons, or that the child does not want to talk to us. Today, let's talk about how parents do it, so that children are willing to talk to their parents.
1. There is no value judgment. After listening to the children come home and say, Mom, I am so sad. Today, I failed the exam. Mom stopped what she was doing, sat down and said, would you like to tell me? This is effective listening, not making any value judgments. Even if the child doesn't agree with you, it's normal to admit that he may make people angry, and you should never be angry, respect him, and let him talk to him as much as he wants.
I hate our teachers very much. You may be a little surprised when parents hear their child say such things, but parents should try to understand his words. What did the teacher do? Would you hate him so much? The child replied that he punished the students who failed the exam today. Mom asked, because he also punished, so you are sad? Parents ask questions, answer questions, and invisibly tell their children what the answers are. In the answer, the child will find that he is also responsible, and should not blindly evade responsibility and blame the teacher.
2. Don't deal with your child's mistakes more than once. When children do something wrong, regardless of whether the parents' parents' education methods are appropriate, the children will basically admit their mistakes. But after all, children have limited self-control, and it is inevitable that they will make mistakes of the same nature to varying degrees. At this time, parents should pay attention not to make the mistake of multiple processing.
Children also complain, "My mom scolded me, my dad scolded me, and then they all scolded me." At that time, I was very angry, so I also scolded them, so after the scolding, I remembered the past, and I was even more sad that my parents had scolded me like this. "The multiple criticisms of parents can only be regarded as an exaggerated attitude by children, which will cause resentment and weaken the parents' original persuasiveness."
Message: When a child does something wrong and accepts blame, no matter what he does verbally, it means that he has raised his vigilance, do not criticize multiplely, and learn to tolerate and understand. Only when the relationship is harmonious, the child will be unguarded and willing to talk to the parents.