"Text/Babe Bean Parenting Class (original article, welcome to reprint and share)"
With the liberalization of the two-child policy, in recent years, there has been a "second-child tide", in this wave, there is a group of people who can't sit still and want to move, that is, elderly parents.
Elderly parents in their 40s and 50s, most of whom live in large families with many brothers and sisters, also hope to have one more child after there is no restriction on one child, and the family is more lively. But older parents must face reality while remaining optimistic.
After giving birth at an advanced age, she asked her daughter to raise her brother, and the daughter asked, "Who will raise my son?" "Parents bow their heads in shame
There are 48-year-old couples who have always regretted not having a son, and it turned out that because the policy did not allow it, they could only ask for one. Now that the policy allows it, I continue to see that the people around me have a second child, and there are also children of similar ages, and I can't help but think about living.
They did not discuss their plans with their daughters, and directly asked for a child. The mother and daughter are pregnant almost at the same time, but women over 35 years old are advanced mothers, and there is a great risk.
The 48-year-old mother had abnormal physical abnormalities during pregnancy, and experienced a great crisis during childbirth, and after rescuing the mother and child, they were safe, and the doctor clearly informed that her physical condition was difficult to withstand the hardships of raising children.
So after the couple discussed, they decided to let their daughter raise their brother on their behalf, thinking that anyway, a baby is also raised, and two babies are also brought.
When the daughter learned about it, it was difficult to accept it, and she couldn't help but question her parents, "I adopt my brother, who will raise my son?" The couple was speechless and bowed their heads in shame.
Parents should deal with the relationship with the eldest before having a second child at an advanced age
Prepare in all aspects to reduce the pressure on the boss
Having children, especially a second child, is a very important thing, affecting the structure of the family and the harmony and stability of the future. Therefore, parents, especially elderly parents, cannot simply have a hot head, want to want, and do not consider the consequences.
The first consideration is that the physical condition of elderly parents, if the physical health is still good, if there is heart disease, high blood pressure, diabetes and other diseases that are not suitable for children, then it is necessary to carefully consider. Also take into account economic factors, the cost of raising a child now is absolutely different from the cost of raising a child in the past, whether the family can afford to support another child from birth to marriage.
Communicate fully with the boss and try to get recognition
According to the traditional Chinese concept, the eldest brother is like a father, and the eldest daughter is like a mother. There is a responsibility to take on the responsibility of raising younger siblings. But today's young people are mostly only children, self-centered, and value individual freedom and rights.
Therefore, after careful consideration, after the elderly parents decide to have a second child, they must fully communicate with the boss to express that the parents are carefully considered, and why they want to have another child, the significance of having a new family member, and the preparations. I believe that after parents communicate openly and honestly with the boss, they will be recognized, and they are afraid of being born directly without sound.
Let the boss realize the importance of siblings
One-child families are faced, parents and elderly people are sick, children are still young and need to be taken care of, and work can not take too long leave. Many people admit that if there are siblings, they may share some of them together.
I am sick or have an accident, and I envy having brothers and sisters to take care of or support. Parents should let the boss realize that having a second child is not to increase the burden on him, but to have someone to rely on when necessary.
What methods should children take to protect their rights when their parents want to have a second child at an advanced age?
Express yourself authentically
Children must be honest about their worries or worries, and perhaps the parents you are worried about have solved. If you don't say it, your parents will never know what you really think, and you will mislead your parents into thinking that you are welcoming and looking forward to new family members, and once there is a conflict in the future, it may become your problem.
It can also be said that the families around the second child have problems that have emerged, and put forward their opinions from different angles.
Define your bottom line
After accepting that there will be a younger brother or sister in the family, first of all, you must clarify where your bottom line is and what is unacceptable, and then tell your parents. For example, most people can accept to take care of their brother or sister to the extent that they can.
But if you give up other things and raise them as your own children, it is difficult to accept. You can sacrifice some leisure time and spend some money for your younger siblings, but you can't sacrifice your family and career.
Parenting grace is greater than heaven and earth, as a parent can not take the credit as a weight, in order to force children to take care of younger siblings, having a second child requires great energy and material resources, advising those elderly couples to think twice before conceiving, be cautious.