How to correctly grasp the expectations of children

Every child is self-confident and enterprising, but in the process of learning, some children lose the motivation to learn, some children lose self-confidence, and some children have poor academic performance because of greed or laziness. But whatever the reason, if children can see the expectations of parents and teachers for themselves, and affirm themselves, then they will strive to do better and repay the expectations of parents and teachers with better grades.

So, as parents, how do we properly grasp the expectations of our children?

1. Always have good expectations for your child

No matter how the child behaves, no matter what the people around them think of the child, parents must have expectations for the child, tell the child that "you are smart, and you will be able to achieve something by making efforts", "You have great potential, and you will definitely make a difference in the future", and do not reprimand the child at any time, "You are so stupid!" "You can only count down to the first", otherwise the child will lose the effort and motivation to move forward because of the disappointment of the parents in themselves.

Because compared with other people's opinions, parents' expectations have a greater impact on their children. If a child thinks that even his parents are not optimistic about him, he will completely lose confidence and hope.

2． Reasonable expectations, do not generate excessive expectations

Parents want their children to get better and better, so it is easy to have too high expectations for their children and design a grand blueprint for their children that is beyond their capabilities. For example, I hope that my child will get the first place every time, be admitted to a key university, and get the opportunity to study abroad...

But once the child can not meet the expectations of the parents, the child will feel useless, and thus lose the confidence to continue to work hard, or even completely lose confidence in themselves.

A primary school student, who had a very good academic performance at the beginning, was at the top of every exam. However, when the mother saw that her friend's children were the top three in the class every time, she hoped that her children could also get the first place every time. But every time you take the first place, what is so easy to do? Besides, this child is not born with extraordinary intelligence. In the case of not always meeting the mother's expectations, the child became more and more annoyed with learning, more and more inferior, and his grades plummeted.

Therefore, we must be full of expectations for children, but we must not only establish expectations for children according to our own wishes, otherwise we can only harm the children.

3. Don't just focus on academic performance

It is good to have expectations for children, but now many parents only freeze their expectations on academic performance, hoping that their children will get high scores and improve their rankings. But the child's learning is not limited to the score and ranking, parents' expectations of the child should also include learning ability, learning attitude, otherwise not only can not let the child improve the performance, but also may reduce the child's enthusiasm for learning, hit the child's self-confidence.