If a child suddenly said that he would go to "roast sweet potatoes" when he grew up, how would you answer?
Soon to the end of the year, this is also the time when children love to imagine the future of life.
Not long ago, a child and mother in Suzhou, Jiangsu Province, about "planning after growing up", which made netizens "fiercely" moved!
Son: What if I am admitted to Tsinghua?
Mom: Then Mom is very proud of you.
Son: What if I am admitted to Peking University?
Mom: I'll be very proud too.
Son: What about me getting into sweet potatoes?
Mom: If you roast sweet potatoes that are sweet, sweet, soft and delicious, I think it's okay and I'll be proud of you.
Son: I'll be a roasted sweet potato owner from now on.
Mom: Hahahahaha that congratulations to Xu Guoguo for having a new wish.
Mom's answer is really too warm, and this video has also attracted many netizens to like it, and praise for mom's approach.
Kao Qinghua Peking University is a beautiful dream, and "roasted sweet potatoes" are also proud of children. Because no matter what the child does, as long as he is serious and hardworking, he is shining and is worth encouraging.
It is also the mother's loving response that the child's eyes flash with a promising future.
However, this encouragement is actually a scarce commodity in some families.
Some parents are dissatisfied when they hear their children say such a wish, and may even want to try to get their child's dream back on track.
The kid who wanted to be a courier
A few days ago, a teacher gave the children a dream theme class. When asked," "What is your dream," the children began to speak cheerfully.
Some said, "I'm going to be an astronaut and go to space to find a black hole." ”
Some said, "I'm going to be a cop and arrest all the bad guys." ”
Some said, "I'm going to be a doctor and give injections to patients every day." ”
Others say I want to be Iron Man, I want to be a princess, I want to be a knight...
Children's dreams are varied, and having a little boy is a little different.
He stood up at first and excitedly said, "I want to be a courier..."
Before the words were finished, the children laughed loudly, "What's so good about the courier", "Not at all"...
The little boy's face turned red at once, his little hands clutching the hem of his coat, trying to refute it, but he didn't know what to say.
The teacher quieted the class, shook the boy's hand, and asked him, "Why do you want to be a courier?" ”
After waiting for half a day, the boy said slowly and seriously: "Sending a courier can make others happy, and Radius is like this." He delivers the package to the children and helps them solve all kinds of troubles, and I want to be like Radius, helping others and making them happy. ”
When children talk about their dreams, children yearn to become "big people", and parents will give them a thumbs up and praise their ambitions.
However, when some children aspire to occupations that we consider "ordinary", some parents will habitually label their children as "unambitious" and then do their best to correct them.
However, we forget one very important thing, that is, to ask why children have such dreams, to crouch down and see what a sincere heart is behind these "ordinary" dreams.
In fact, for a small child, what matters is not who to become, but how to become better because of dreams.
Therefore, instead of desperately "denying" and "suppressing" the child's naïve ideas, it is better to give him a little more encouragement and confidence, so that he can walk wider and more calmly on the road of life.
Children need encouragement,
Just like plants need water
Last year, when a mother was surfing the live stream shopping, her son suddenly came to her side and said: "Mom, I want to be Li Jiaqi in the future, can I?" ”
The mother was stunned at first, and did not rush to refute it, but asked her son: "Why do you want to be Li Jiaqi?" ”
The son replied that because Li Jiaqi is very hot now, he wants to be as famous as Li Jiaqi.
The mother still did not deny her son's idea, but took out two photos, one is a photo of Li Jiaqi's recent live broadcast, and the other is a photo of Li Jiaqi squatting in the cubicle to do live broadcast before becoming famous.
She told her son: "Child, what you envy is actually the glamorous Li Jiaqi, not the obscure Li Jiaqi." Li Jiaqi's success is not achieved overnight, 365 days a year, he has done 389 live broadcasts, from 7 pm to 1 am, 4 am to sleep, has tried 380 lipsticks in a row, and finally the lips are almost cracked. And these are just the tip of the iceberg of Li Jiaqi's fame experience.
The reason why I tell you this is not to disagree with your ideas, but to let you know that no one can succeed casually.
If you can identify the goal and suffer this pain, no matter what you choose to do in the future, you will not disappoint your mother. ”
Children need encouragement, just as plants need water.
Parents appreciate and encourage their children, which is the driving force for children's growth.
So, when the child tells you that he has some unrealistic ideas, please be a little more patient and look at the matter with a developmental eye;
When your child encounters a problem, please communicate more sincerely and give him appropriate advice when needed;
When your child has improved, please do not skimp on your encouragement, affirm his efforts, his attitude, he will be more motivated.
"Encourage" to be precise,
Don't overdo it
When it comes to "encouragement", some parents have such a misunderstanding, believing that "encouragement" is to desperately "cheer" for their children all the time.
In fact, emptyly cheering the child up, this encouragement has become a kind of expectant "pressure", which makes him breathless and leads to emotional loss of control.
The real "encouragement of education" is like this:
Encourage your child's behavior, not just focus on results
Encourage children to avoid being empty and focused on results, and let children feel a sense of control over things.
Such as: the process of hard work, perseverance, self-discipline and so on.
Only by affirming and encouraging from specific behaviors can we cultivate children with courageous and courageous growth-oriented thinking who are not afraid of things.
Discover your child's hidden sparkles
Some time ago, the video of Ding Yanqing, a professor at Peking University, complaining about his daughter exploded on the Internet.
Because his daughter was a "school scum", he was particularly anxious, but in the end he found the most unique advantage of his daughter.
Once when his daughter came to his office, she saw four big characters hanging on the wall and asked her father, "What is the word?" Professor Ding replied, "Gentlemen and leopards change." The daughter listened to the laughter: "Haha, gentleman instant noodles." ”
Professor Ding listened to it and not only did not accuse her daughter of not knowing words but also blindly changed her idioms, but praised her daughter's humor and fun.
Later, the daughter changed the phrase "what can make a difference" to "cooked steamed dumplings".
In his opinion, the imagination and fun of her daughter are her most unique abilities:
"Every child has a unique place, even a superiority, parents can not use a single scale to look at the child, should be good at finding the child's advantages in other aspects, find a path that is most suitable for him to assist him, encourage him."
Those shining points that are tapped by parents can make children useful talents in various fields in the future.
"You have to raise the children you have, not the children you expect."
Parents should maintain a normal heart, accept the child's vulnerability with unconditional love, discover the child's strengths, and affirm the child's efforts.
No matter where such a child is, he can find his own path and pursue it with all his strength in the life he chooses for himself.