Children make mistakes "seven no blame" Chinese medicine tells you why

Children inevitably make mistakes in the process of growing up, and parents should indeed blame when they should blame, but when and under what circumstances should they not be blamed? If you don't blame your child when you shouldn't blame it, what impact will it have on your child's health? Lü Kun, a famous scholar in the late Ming Dynasty, proposed the "Seven No Responsibilities" in the "Groaning Language". The original text says: "The humble have been, and those who are cautious about it are blamed." No responsibility to the crowd, no responsibility for remorse, no responsibility for the night, no responsibility for eating, no responsibility for celebrating, no responsibility for sorrow, no responsibility for illness. The general meaning of this sentence is: young children have faults, and they should be cautious when they blame, do not blame in front of everyone, do not blame in shame and regret, do not blame at night, do not blame when eating, do not blame when they are celebrating, do not blame when they are sad, and do not blame when they are sick. From the perspective of healthy parenting, this "seven no responsibilities" is still thought-provoking!

Pediatric experts from Nanjing Hospital of Integrated Traditional Chinese and Western Medicine analyze for you from the perspective of traditional Chinese medicine, why "seven no responsibilities"?

Do not blame the public for liver depression

Many parents feel that publicly blaming their children not only makes it easier for children to "remember for a long time", but also helps to establish their own majesty, and can make others feel that they are strict with the attitude of godson. But in fact, this will not only damage the child's self-esteem, but also make the child appear liver depression over time. Sun Gang, attending physician of the Liver Disease Clinic of Nanjing Hospital of Integrated Traditional Chinese and Western Medicine, said that Chinese medicine believes that "liver" corresponds to "wood", and "liver xi tiao da". And why don't our children like to grow up without being suppressed like growing trees? When the child is punished in public, the child's emotional consciousness will feel depressed, and the qi opportunity will be blocked, which is also an important reason for the evidence of liver qi depression in Chinese medicine.

So, what kind of consequences will the liver qi knot cause to the health of the child? Cui Ni, chief physician of the Department of Pediatrics of Nanjing Hospital of Integrated Traditional Chinese and Western Medicine, said that Chinese medicine believes that the liver has the function of "hiding blood", and one of the aspects reflected in it is to regulate blood volume. If the liver is depressed, how can the qi and blood in the child's body be smooth? How to nourish the internal organs? Can children still grow up as healthy as thriving trees? Obviously not!

A survey by the Yale Child Health Research Center in the United States also found that if parents and teachers often reprimand, abuse or even discriminate, intimidate and corporal punishment of children, it may affect the height development of children to varying degrees. At the bottom of the brain is a tissue called the hypothalamus, which acts to stimulate and produce growth-promoting hormones based on various weak signals from neural networks. Long-term in a state of high mental tension and depression, resulting in excessive psychological pressure in children, growth hormone reduction, affecting height development, and even suffering from short stature, which is called "mental deprivation short stature" in Western medicine. Therefore, if you want your child to grow up healthily, not to be "inferior" in height, parents should especially avoid scolding their children in public!

Remorse does not blame for injuring the spleen

It should be said that most children who have done wrong things as long as they realize their mistakes will generally have a sense of remorse, but some parents are angry, difficult to control their emotions, unable to calm down, and then criticize the children who have felt remorse again and again, and as a result, the child's "acquired nature" - spleen, is injured!

Chinese medicine believes that the spleen in the body "fits the muscles, the main limbs." "The human body relies on the subtle nutrients of the water valley transported by the spleen to make the muscles full and developed, and the limbs are powerful.

Cui Ni, chief physician of the Department of Pediatrics of Nanjing Hospital of Integrated Traditional Chinese and Western Medicine, reminded that the healthy function of the child's spleen is often directly related to the strength and thinness of the children's muscles and the normal function of the limbs. If the spleen is weak, the muscles lose their nutrients and gradually lose weight or become weak and loose. If you often wonder why your child is not as strong as a child, first introspect whether you often scold your child when you are remorseful?

Twilight does not blame night terrors

Many parents have also done not scold their children in public, but they have held their stomachs and returned home to punish their children, right? During the day, children have no time to go to work on their own, and it seems to be a good time at night! Especially before going to bed, the child may be able to repent better in a quiet environment when he sleeps. But if you think so, you're wrong again!

Bian Xun, chief physician of the Department of Pediatrics of Nanjing Hospital of Integrated Traditional Chinese and Western Medicine, introduced that Chinese medicine believes that children's internal organs are delicate, their spirit is easy to be frightened and weak, and the scolding at night will indeed impress the children, but because of this, it is easier to make the child's mind scattered, and then there is a phenomenon of not being able to sleep at night, and even crying at night. Poor sleep can cause irreversible damage to children's learning and memory, and chronic sleep loss may be occult to the damage of children's learning and memory function. Long-term lack of sleep can also lead to a decline in immune function, a decline in physical fitness, and a decline in attention and memory, resulting in inefficient learning.

Diet is not responsible for preventing stomach damage

Some children are prone to appear at the dinner table when they make mistakes, and some parents are accustomed to chanting some children's deficiencies when their children eat, and if the children say a few words, they will escalate from chanting to severe scolding. But can a child eat well amid the chatter of scolding? How will their health be affected?

Wu Yongdong, chief physician of the Department of Pediatrics of Nanjing Hospital of Integrated Traditional Chinese and Western Medicine, said that Chinese medicine attaches great importance to "gastric qi" and believes that "people take gas as the basis". If the stomach qi is strong, the five organs are prosperous, the stomach qi is weak, the five organs are weak, the stomach qi is born, and if there is no stomach qi, it dies. Criticize the child when he eats, then his stomach will gradually weaken. From the perspective of Western medicine, it can even cause children to have stomach ulcers.

Stomach ulcer disease is often considered a common disease in adults, and it was previously thought to be rare in children, but this is not the case. The human nervous system has an important regulatory effect on gastric juice secretion and gastric movement, the child's nervous system is not perfect, plant function is unstable, and the child's scolding by parents when eating can cause its autonomic nerve dysfunction, resulting in gastrointestinal smooth muscles and vascular spasm, inducing ulcers.

Celebrate without taking responsibility for being sad

Maybe some parents will say that it is always okay to say that when a child is happy, it will not have any impact on the health of the child, right? From the perspective of TCM, this is also inappropriate. Chinese medicine believes that the heart in the five viscera corresponds to the joy of the seven emotions, and when the child is happy, you scold the child, the child will not only be sad, but also really hurt his "heart".

Chinese medicine believes that the heart is the lord of the gods and the sect of the pulse. It plays a role in dominating the activities of life, so the Suqin Linglan Secret Codex calls it "the official of the monarch". The physiological function of the heart mainly has two aspects: one is the main bloodline, and the other is the main consciousness, so when the child is in a good mood, he can enlighten and educate in a timely manner, but he must not scold, otherwise it will damage the child's body and mind.

Sorrow does not blame the lungs

Chinese medicine believes that the lungs in the five internal organs correspond to the sorrow in the seven emotions, the so-called "great sad lungs"! When people are sad and sad, they can make the lungs depressed, dissipate the qi and yin, and have symptoms such as colds and coughs. Chinese medicine believes that the lungs are the main fur, so sadness and sadness of the lungs can also be manifested in skin diseases caused by certain mental factors. Emotional depression, sadness and sadness can lead to urticaria, alopecia areata, psoriasis, etc. Parents and friends think about it, when the child is unhappy, he is already very sad, is it even more sad for you to scold him like this?

Diseases are not reprehensible

Some parents will also reprimand when the child is sick. For example, some parents will say, "How many times have you told me?" Sick from the mouth, you just don't listen! You see how sick you are now. It's well deserved! Don't listen to the old man, suffer losses in front of you! Words like this may seem like a way for parents to just deepen their child's impression, but in fact, such an occasion is not appropriate.

Earlier we talked about six reasons for not being responsible, just imagine, when the child is not sick, scolding there are still so many health risks, how can the child withstand the torment of the soul when he is sick and weak, and his resistance is reduced? At this time, scolding the child does not make the child sick? Therefore, I hope that parents will give more warmth when their children are sick, rather than reprimanding, so that we can create a healthy growth atmosphere for our children, less scolding, more encouragement, so that they can grow better!

What should I do if my child makes a mistake?

1. Point out the deficiencies, when analyzing and pointing out the shortcomings of the student or child together, it is necessary to tell him very accurately where the deficiencies are, rather than using words such as "stupid" and "poor" in general, and tell him where the problem is and how to solve it. For example, if your child is not very good at math, he should ask him, "What is the biggest problem you have when you study math?" Instead of saying, "You're so stupid, someone else's kid did so well in math, why can't you?" ”

2. Praise the strengths and encourage parents to carefully observe their children's strengths, rather than focusing on their children's shortcomings. By praising his strengths, you can encourage him to actively improve his shortcomings. Finally, it should be noted that parents are the best teachers for children! Parents should lead by example and set a good example for their children. (Reporter Cai Yunqi Correspondent Yang Pu)

Source: Yangtze Evening News