The more complex things are, the more simple they have to face. In the normal life, I use the method of self-questioning and self-answering to help parents and friends to clarify the standards of good children: What is the direction of children's growth? Children should grow up in the direction of adults. The direction of adults accompanying children should be "not accompanying", and accompanying is to not accompany children.
What is the content of adult life? Under normal circumstances, the life content of qualified adults should include at least the following aspects: earning money independently, spending money reasonably, falling in love and getting married correctly, having children healthy and happy, honoring parents, treating relatives and friends, neighbors, and colleagues, and feeling happy...
So, to make children adults, do you want to try to let them receive some education and exercise in the process of children's growth? For example, do you want to teach them how to spend money to make money? Should they be allowed to make love? The answer is undoubtedly yes.
I want my child to grow up, but I don't want him to receive the education and exercise of "adult life content", how can a child grow up? College students in western developed countries can fully adapt to their jobs within two or three months after graduation, while university graduates in mainland China usually have to complete their jobs independently after one and a half years. Why? Worth pondering.
In normal life, our children's lives are almost only one thing: reading, and only reading the textbooks distributed by the school. When reading becomes the only important content of a child's life, it is inevitable that all other contents of life will be squeezed out of place and obediently waiting; occasionally, when there will be a room for entering the house, it must also be because the child is well read, and the adult is kind to the temporary reward given to the child. How can a 00-year-old child who has lived a weightless and weightless life for a long time grow up and succeed happily?
The so-called weightlessness is that all the life content other than the child's reading is shut down and turned, all the affairs are handled by the parents, the child loses a lot of opportunities for growth, and there is no foundation for talking and doing things, leaving people with a frivolous and ethereal impression. Although many children have received a considerable degree of education, they lack the minimum ability to judge right from good to wrong. The so-called weight bearing, the children's reading and learning tasks are extremely heavy, overwhelmed, the children's school bags are heavy and the glasses are deepening, which is the best evidence.
There is a particularly strange phenomenon in Chinese education: before a child becomes an adult, the only important task is to read, and nothing else; after the child becomes an adult, the only important task is to earn money, not to read. Here, allow me to refer to the education that children receive in school as a lesson, so that the education that children must receive also include at least the following aspects: sex education, love education, money education, the cultivation of resistance to frustration, and the establishment of a sense of responsibility.
If the school education scores 95 points, and the other homework is 0 to 10 points, then the average score of the child's homework is around 20 points; if the child's school education scores 80 points, and all other homework also scores 80 points, then the average score of the child's homework is 80 points.
Do we want a child with an 80 point, or a child with a score of 20? The answer is obvious. I am proud to tell you that my daughter is such a good child with 80 points. A lot of knowledge from school education, as long as it is properly understood, is enough to develop children and children in an all-round way
The acquisition of knowledge by the son is the most important thing. As Carnegie said: Only 15 percent of a person's success comes down to his expertise, and 85 percent comes down to his ability to express ideas, lead others, and arouse the enthusiasm of others.
The timeliness of knowledge is rapidly shortening, the knowledge of college students in the 50s can be used for 30 years, the knowledge of college students in the 90s can be used for 10 years, and the knowledge learned by college students today may only be used for 1 year. Knowledge is not power, only transformed knowledge is power.
Alas! Times are moving fast, and parents and educators on the front lines of education face extremely serious challenges: what do we teach our current students, put themselves into work that does not currently exist after graduation, and use technologies that have not yet been invented to solve problems that we never imagined? We can only summon up enough courage to encourage our children: learn to identify knowledge, dare to abandon knowledge, be good at transforming knowledge, command knowledge with wisdom, and win victory with ability.
Here's a look at "love." The so-called love is to try to get married. Love is a skill that children must cultivate before they grow into adults. Falling in love is a headache for the majority of parents: early love is afraid, late love is worried, no love is sad, and extramarital love is fearful. Objectively speaking, whether a child is in love or not should not be transferred by the will of adults, and can only be determined by the physical and psychological characteristics of children. Children want to fall in love, and children are hungry to eat, is the need of human nature, adults do not easily fight with human nature. Children are not in love, just like children are unwell and do not want to eat. Love and love education are a must!
What is a good child? At this point, we have learned very well that a child who is constantly educated to "become an adult content" can be called a good child.
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