My grandmother is 89 years old this year, and my aunt jumps up and down like a monkey every day, which makes me see the darkness of human nature.
My grandmother lived a long life, her life was relatively hard, and when she was young, she had several disasters, and she carried them all over, and her body bones were called a strong one.
What made me feel even more exaggerated was my grandmother, one tooth, only four broken, the other teeth are still there.
Thinking about me again, now there are some signs of loose teeth, in addition to the fact that my grandmother has been working and bending over for many years, resulting in frequent pain in the back, not being able to sleep at night, and snoring and dreaming when sleeping.
There was basically nothing wrong with that, and according to the other old people in the village, my grandmother's physique was called a hard one.
On weekdays, my grandmother actively helped my uncle and aunt to cook on the fire at home, and sometimes did some housework incidentally.
There is a cemetery next to grandma's house, buried all kinds of large and small graves all year round, there is a gap between the graves, grandma will take a hoe to plant some peanuts in it, plant some wild vegetables, and when the harvest comes, mix a cold dish to eat in her own home.
To outsiders, such days and harmony are beautiful, but my aunt slowly shows an impatient look.
Sometimes he even pointed at his grandmother's nose and said, how come you old guy is still so alive? You've lived such a long time, why don't you still use a wheelchair? Don't really say that your body is really hard.
Every time we encounter this situation, as a junior, we all hug unevenly, pointing to the nose of the aunt and saying, people are watching in the day, you treat your grandmother like this, you are careful that your children will treat you like this again in the future, this sentence is not okay, after saying it, the face of the aunt suddenly changes.
You must have seen the kind of look of middle-aged and elderly women arguing in the village, this kind of look is now rare, but my aunt will be such an exclusive school.
My aunt clenched her hands into fists, the index fingers of both hands sticking out, and then at an eerie angle downwards to the ground.
Along with his right foot, he rose and fell rhythmically, and said all kinds of curse words in his mouth, as if he could bring bad luck to others.
In addition to the laughter we couldn't help but laugh after we saw it, it was still a little embarrassing, after all, this was my aunt.
There are always people who say that their parents are still alive in their eighties, which is not necessarily a good thing, is this true? Let's analyze this matter according to my aunt's thinking concept.
Then we have to set a model for today's young people, middle-aged people, what kind of dependence is between children and parents?
This article is strongly recommended for everyone to help forward, recommended to those who are not filial to their parents or have a slight complaint about their parents, thank you.
Point 1: The conflict of values leads to an intensification of the conflict between children and their parents.
We rarely realize this, why in some other countries, the generation gap between parents and children is not as large as imagined.
The main reason for this is that the country is developing better and better, getting richer and stronger, and the development of society is getting faster and faster.
How fast is it? Some elderly people are about to catch up with the pace of the times, you tell him to scan the code to pay, the old man has 2 yuan and 5 cents in his pocket, but he does not know where to go to find change.
So much so that cash flow is rarely seen in major shopping malls and supermarkets, and I will just give a simple case, taking my grandmother as an example.
In the previous time, the days were tight, and I was also used to saving, and the biggest luxury in the weekdays may be to go to the commissary to spend two dollars to buy 4 steamed buns, spend 5 cents to buy a bag of squeezed vegetables, so I feel that the days are beautiful, happy and don't want it.
But my aunt is not like this, my aunt usually thinks about eating roast chicken and stewing big elbows, which is a problem.
First, the concept of consumption is different.
My aunt ate meat almost every once, and even once bought a big goose from someone else's house, and the price of that big goose exceeded 300 yuan.
Then I personally stewed a big goose in an iron pot, and there was a cake on it, which was particularly beautiful and nourishing, and the grandmother next to her saw it and poked it straight
Tooth flower seeds
, covering your heart, liver, spleen, stomach and lungs, said how come you are so luxurious, how much money can our family save?
This sentence is not good, after saying it, my aunt got angry, and threw all the pots and pans at home on the ground, and the color TV I just bought also kicked out a big hole with my heel.
Then after the aunt sent a message of anger, she pointed to her grandmother and said why eat the iron pot stew goose, didn't we go to water the ground yesterday?
After pouring the ground for 8 hours, tired and hungry, I made an iron pot stewed goose today, what's wrong? Just spent 300 bucks?
Oh, it turns out that spending 300 yuan on your old man's heart is very painful, so you see, I just smashed this TV can cost more than 5,000 yuan?
If you don't say that the poor couple has declined, this TV uncle and aunt saved up for three months to buy it, and the result was that the aunt was angry and directly kicked the heel to destroy.
Second, the concept of education is different.
My aunt is an acute child, although she has children in her old age, but my aunt still thinks that there is filial piety under the stick, so she will take a small wooden stick and beat her child when she is idle.
For example, when the child was in elementary school, he learned mathematics 1 + 1 = 2, this matter the aunt said 5 times, the child still did not understand, the aunt roared hoarsely 1 + 1 = 2, so simple how do you not understand?
A foot kicked the child to the side, and then every time the child was educated, the family was full of ghosts crying wolf howl.
Sometimes there are even some prestigious old people in the village, when they go fishing at night with searchlights and fishing nets.
At that time, there was no fishing hook or fishing rod, and those who liked to fish were holding large nets to fish, and they heard it
aunt
The ghosts in the house cried wolf, frightening these old people not lightly, knocking on the door for half an hour, the door was finally opened, and the aunt was still scolding her children loudly with an angry face.
I remembered my aunt the most when she was young, almost 20 years ago, because at that time I just remembered, the village did not know who invented, when it rained with a large plastic bag on the peanuts, the peanuts will not be moldy and bad.
Inventing this thing is indeed a good thing,
What the
What about good things? Because we have a lot of rain there, there are many people who grow peanuts, peanuts can be pressed into peanut oil to sell money, peanut cake can be used for family pets and chickens to eat.
But I don't know when to start the village into the thief, the plastic bags in our village have been stolen, we don't think the plastic bags 10 yuan 200 is very cheap, not like this, the price of plastic bags at that time is ridiculously expensive.
And it is a very thick layer, at every turn is more than ten square meters and twenty square meters of that kind of large plastic stool, the aunt is very angry, and despite the uncle's persuasion, a person lifted the ladder to climb to the roof, scolded for three days and three nights.
Except for a small amount of water, there was basically no rest, and sometimes I could hear my aunt's roar at two or three o'clock in the morning.
Maybe the aunt was too tough, scolded for three days, the throat was vomiting blood, and the whole person was haggard, still wanted to say dirty words, after all, the person who stole the plastic bag took advantage of the night and did not pay attention, and secretly returned the aunt's plastic bag.
Of course, I still don't know who stole the plastic bag, but the fierce image of my aunt left a great shock on me.
And the aunt always believes that if the child can't learn well, it is good to take a small stick to hit the palm of the hand, if the child misbehaves and take the small stick to hit the palm of the hand, if the child does not respect the elders, it is good to take the small stick to beat the palm of the hand.
According to the aunt, there is nothing, it is a small stick to beat the palm of the hand, can educate the child, but relatively speaking, the grandmother's attitude of educating the child is several grades better than that of the aunt.
Grandma always thinks that the child is still young, does not know right or wrong, appropriate punishment as long as the child knows that it is wrong, you do not really criticize the child, so that the child does not dare to eat at home at noon, take the meal to the toilet to eat.
It took a long time for my aunt to change this problem. And these contradictions in daily life also laid the groundwork for the contradictions between aunt and grandmother.
Point 2: When people get old, their problems will increase.
We must always understand that once a person is old and old, no matter how strong your physique is, there will be a day when there will be a problem, and this problem is often a problem that can be shown to the outside world.
First, the snoring of grandma's sleep was getting louder and louder.
In fact, because of perennial labor, most of the rural elderly will have some problems in their old age, even if you are not an elderly person in the countryside, they often enjoy happiness on weekdays, but when they are old, there should be many problems.
The biggest problem with Grandma is that when lying in bed, she always feels phlegm in her throat, and that sound is very ugly and very loud, in fact, it is the same as snoring, but it is different from snoring.
According to my aunt, as long as my grandmother fell asleep at night, the whole family did not have to sleep, and the sound was like a roller coaster, the sound was harsh and unpleasant.
Even a few times after Grandma fell asleep at night, My Aunt deliberately made some movements to wake Her Grandma up, and then she seized the time to sleep.
But sometimes Grandma sleeps to death, no matter what the aunt spends, the strength of the nine bulls and tigers, Grandma should fall asleep or fall asleep, there is no need to run.
So often after grandma gets up in the morning, she will find that all the pots and pans bought at home have been dropped on the ground, which is why my aunt fell to the ground at night in order to wake up.
Aunt, on the 2nd day, her arms were red and swollen, pointing to grandma's nose and saying, don't say that you can still really sleep, grandma naturally smiled shyly after listening to it, a smile but laughed, and her heart must be worried.
Isn't this the end of the calf? These pots and pans were replaced with steel for the family sooner or later.
Second, there are more and more problems with grandma.
When you are old, your appetite is not good, and you are easy to vomit after eating, these are not important, what is important is that grandma likes to go to the toilet on weekdays, and it is possible to stay in the toilet for half an hour or an hour.
And the aunt and uncle also like to go to the toilet, or not to say that the family does not enter the door, so on weekdays, as long as the two people are at home, the main task is to grab the toilet.
So much so that earlier, almost pushed forward for 10 years, 20 years and 20 years, it was my aunt who had been teaching my cousin.
And when my cousin ran to the toilet every time he ate at noon, my aunt and grandmother stared at each other, and when the toilet was finished, the children grabbed it, and neither of us wanted to grab the toilet.
Although it is a bit humorous to say this, it is a fact that my aunt sometimes takes advantage of her grandmother's efforts to go to the toilet, and puts a firecracker in the courtyard, and this firecracker scares my grandmother not lightly.
Sometimes I told my grandmother that if you don't come out of this toilet door again, I'll tear it down for you.
Originally, the two people had a contradiction in this regard, but as time went on, Grandma grew older, her body bones became weaker and weaker, and her intestines became more and more uncomfortable, and there were more and more problems, and all kinds of problems deepened my aunt's dissatisfaction with my grandmother.
And according to my aunt, everyone is an animal that does not lose its hair until the spring, and grandma can pour well, and when she is old, she has also begun to lose hair, and many of her old hair has fallen off, and it is falling off piece by piece.
Originally, Grandma's heart was not smooth, but she found such a daughter-in-law, which was even more worried, and only made teeth and flowers all day, so that several teeth were poked out.
Third, Grandma's memory is getting worse and worse.
To say that my aunt is also a strange, there are a total of 5 people in the family, he can pour well, prepared 30 towels, according to the aunt, one person 5 towels, the rest of the towels are for guests.
So these 5 towels are one person wiping their heads, one person washing their faces, one person wiping their feet, and what does one person do? There is also a person who wipes his body, which means that one person needs to use 5 towels.
But my uncle has only used a towel, anyway, he does not feel dirty, my grandmother this can be difficult, because my aunt is ingenious, each towel is written on the name, with the number and take the color, these things young people can not understand, my grandmother can not understand.
So what my aunt often does with the towel, it is often taken by my grandmother, either wipe the face, or wipe the feet, and then my aunt took out a towel, obviously ready to wipe the face, but my grandmother suddenly took it over to wipe her head, this time my aunt is unwilling, often pointing at my grandmother and scolding.
This really can't blame my grandmother, my junior went to my aunt's house, all a little confused, a washroom that was not big, densely packed with towels.
There are at least 4 layers of top and bottom stacks, and each layer has at least seven or eight towels, all kinds of towels, and all kinds of numbers, just like the rainbow, and my aunt needs to spend an hour every day to sort out the towels, and by the way, peek at who is doing bad things with their towels.
Point 3, how should we treat our parents?
Some people may think that I am talking humorously, but I can only tell you that I am trying to make everyone as humorous as possible, and the actual situation is even worse than what I said, because when it comes to those situations, I feel that some old people may be very sad.
So let's talk about an old man over 80 years old today, what kind of attitude should he establish with his children? At the same time, how should children treat the elderly?
This is a topic that we cannot escape, as the strength of the country becomes stronger and stronger, the people have money in their hands, live a long life, and no longer become a luxury.
Especially the advances in science, the advances in medicine, we live longer and higher, unless you don't focus on personal health and smoke 80 cigarettes a day, that's when I didn't say.
To put it more bluntly, as ordinary people we all have the day of old age, if we really get older, what should we do? And how to deal with the problem of parents and elderly people?
First, children must understand a truth.
We always have to understand a truth, our parents raised us, we have to give our parents a pension, you don't have to tell me how other countries how or what kind of pension concept.
I tell you, here you must send your parents to the end of the pension, otherwise you have no conscience.
Except for some special cases, we need to discuss them separately, such as the elderly often do wrong things, for the vast majority of the elderly, they deserve our serious treatment, because they are the greatest generation.
Because they raised us and raised us to adulthood, this grace is worth treating for a lifetime.
What so-called parents have become a burden on the family when they are old, these are all, worthless, and we should not be brainwashed by such words.
Second, there must be a cause and an effect, and what you do is for your children to watch.
Just like my aunt, obsessive-compulsive disorder usually prepared 30 towels at home, and one day my cousin actually said that he would prepare at least 80 towels after marriage, and at least 15 for a person.
Whoever used it badly, I took a small stick and knocked his palm, and when I heard this statement, I was very shocked and asked my cousin why did you knock the palm of his hand with a small stick?
Before I asked this question, I had already vaguely sensed that something was wrong, and my cousin innocently said why there was no reason for this, my mother did it.
When my aunt was angry, she began to throw dishes haphazardly, and when my cousin was angry, he also began to drop plates and could not drop plates, and the laptops at home, desktop computers, all-in-one computers, and all kinds of mobile phones were dropped by my cousin.
It can be said that blue is better than blue, and now my cousin's house can't say that there are four walls in the house, it is basically winter, and there is no bedding for winter, because my cousin burned two futons.
Whether there is a father who must have a son, or a mother who must have a son, it is a truth.
Third, special cases are treated specially.
We must pay attention to our filial piety to our parents, filial piety to the elderly in the family, but also under a constraint, but also within a reasonable and controllable range, not blind filial piety for the sake of blind filial piety.
As an ordinary person, filial piety to our parents is our duty and our important system.
But if the parents are obviously unreasonable and have obviously done the wrong thing, then the parents should still be criticized.
But what words have to be put on the table, can not give too much pressure to parents, can not implement cold violence, this matter is resolved or honest filial piety to parents.
But as the saying goes, no one thing can be 100% correct, and no parent can be 100% reasonable.
There will always be some parents who will start doing bad things when they are older.
When encountering these parents, the first serious warning, the second time on business, the matter is open, fair and transparent handling and settlement, but also can get the understanding of the neighbors.
But it is still the previous sentence, it is not easy for parents to raise us, and those who should be filial piety must be filial piety, and they cannot be unreasonable because their parents are old, which is a very confusing thing.