From the day of understanding, children are receiving the baptism of education, from ignorance and understanding, not understanding the world, to maturity and erudition, knowing how to receive people and things, and education is indispensable.
Family education, as a vital part of the great education, carries the formation of the child's three views, the cultivation of personality, and even the soundness of personality, which is the stage of education for children to experience a lifetime.
However, parents, as the leaders of family education, often affect the process of their children's family education because of these behaviors.
Today we will take a look at the "killer" behavior in family education, and see if you have inadvertently done it in the process of parenting.
1. Empty praise
In fact, children need more motivation than blind praise.
If you have to emphasize the difference between motivation and praise, then motivation is like motivation to move forward, and praise is more like an inconspicuous trap and obstacle on the road.
Praising the child's achievements is a kind of conceit and self-righteousness psychology, full of loss, humble benefit, this dangerous psychology is the obstacle to the child's progress.
Excellence is never-ending, there is no perfection, rather than letting empty praise make children feel self-contained, it is better to use practical motivation to let children continue to climb the peak.
2. Reward transactions
In the modern society of not worrying about eating and drinking, rewards have become the most favorite transactions parents make with their children.
No matter how poor you are, you can't be poor in education, and you can't be bitter about children, but we all know that adversity produces filial piety, difficulties produce geniuses, and an overly satisfied life often makes children stagnate.
If the child regards the reward as the only driving force for life, learning, and labor, this will make the interaction between parents and children become a transaction that does not fit the relationship, and cultivate the child's deformed growth motivation.
Life, learning, and labor should be an instinct and a necessary skill, not an equivalent bargaining chip, and parents must let their children realize this.
3. Thorough care
Children are the treasure of the whole family, when they were young, they were held in the palm of their hands by the whole family, but when they grew up, it was difficult to gain a foothold in society.
Doting is gradually becoming the norm of family education, and the children's big things and small love parents are eager to do all the work, not to mention letting the children help the family to do some basic labor.
However, the correct concept of parenting requires parents to be "lazy" in their children's affairs, do it themselves, and have enough food and clothing, which is the only way to change from children to adults.
Excessive coddling will only make the child out of place with the world, and teaching the child the instinct to survive is more important than surviving instead of the child, after all, the child is also an independent and complete individual.