When the country opened up the three-child policy, there were many female colleagues of the right age around Xiaobian who chose to get pregnant again. Some of them simply like children, and some of them are in order to realize the dream of their children and daughters, and finally opened up their third child, and they can have one more chance to "fight" again.
But in any case, when we make this greatest and most difficult decision, it must be carefully and repeatedly considered. It is absolutely impossible to have a hot head, say that you are pregnant, say that you are born, and do not seriously plan for the future of the child, nor do you want to be responsible for him.
Some people may say that it is just a matter of having a child, how much do you plan? Who has not had children, although it is difficult to have children, but that is the case, and because there is no money, can not have children?
Before deciding to usher in your little life, we must first ask ourselves a few questions: First, are you fully prepared for his birth and do not mind the sex of your child at all.
Second, do you understand the energy and money it takes to raise a child? As parents, we ourselves lose a large part of our freedom, and in terms of the economy, after ushering in a new life, we will face greater pressure.
We are ushering in not only a small life, but also his life. As a parent, as the leader of his life path, you must do your duty, not to mention that he will be your most loved relative in this world except for your partner.
It is not that the birth of a child must have as much money and property as possible, but at least the right to freely dispose of money. In this way, even when buying a pack of diapers, you have to look at it again and again, and finally choose the cheapest pack.
"I. "I have two babies at home and I am in debt, but I am pregnant again"
Ms. Sun and her husband both came from poor families and did not have a high degree of education, and dropped out of school after finishing middle school. They came to the same big city to work, met under the introduction of friends, and finally entered the palace of marriage.
The two people also had the dream of revitalizing the family, becoming a big boss, and becoming rich, but in the face of reality, they had no knowledge and no ability, they were obviously so ordinary, and they were so far away from the success they longed for.
A few years ago, the husband and wife drove a restaurant, set up a stall, ran a taxi, and finally did not make any money. Later, they raised funds to open a milk tea shop, but in the end they failed.
After experiencing repeated blows, the husband and wife finally decided not to start a business and go to work with peace of mind. But within two months of going to work, Ms. Sun became pregnant.
At that time, her husband's salary was only more than 5,000 a month, and in addition to rent and car loans, she left only 1,000 yuan a month for two people to live.
Throughout the pregnancy, Ms. Sun still ate the same coarse tea and light rice as usual, but fortunately, her daughter was born safely in the end.
The old people on both sides are not in good health, so the child can only be raised by themselves, so Ms. Sun lost the opportunity to work and became a housewife.
Who thought, when the daughter was more than one year old, Ms. Sun was pregnant again, and at that time, for this child, a friend advised them, or give up, don't want it.
He said, you haven't been able to buy a house yet, you have a car, but what's the use? The elderly can't come to help, and there's no need to continue to put pressure on themselves in this case.
The friend was originally a kind suggestion, but Ms. Sun and his wife thought that they were jealous of them, directly scolded back, and have not been in contact since then.
Later, Ms. Sun and her husband gave birth to a daughter, but the eldest daughter got a more difficult disease shortly after, went to many large hospitals for treatment, and finally recovered, but spent a lot of money.
At this time, their eldest daughter was 4 years old, the younger daughter was two years old, but the debt was nearly 200,000, and the family of 4 was still crowded in the rental house, and at this time, Ms. Sun found herself pregnant again.
2. "After giving birth to three children, I finally regretted it"
This time, even Ms. Sun's parents came to persuade her, saying that we can't help you as old people, and your husband and wife's life is not too good, so don't want this child.
Ms. Sun's husband is very insistent, he said that the first two children are daughters, this time how to be a son, I am relieved to give birth to a son.
Ms. Sun felt that what her husband said was quite reasonable, otherwise there would be no son, how could she raise her head in front of relatives and friends in the future, so this time they still did not listen to anyone and gave birth to the child.
If it was really a boy, who knew that when she gave birth this time, she suffered a difficult delivery, and Ms. Sun stepped into the ghost door with half of her feet, but fortunately she pulled back in the end.
Despite this, after giving birth to the child, she was still seriously injured, and lay at home for more than half a year before slowly recovering.
But in fact, this is the case, the husband does not dare to take too many leave, so as not to lose his job. If he loses his job, the family will have no financial resources, and the two adults and three children will have to drink the northwest wind.
So Ms. Sun had to still drag her tired body with her baby every day, and many times she had to help take care of her younger siblings with her boss who had already gone to school.
Sometimes lying in bed, listening to the laughter of other people's children running and playing freely downstairs, and her eldest daughter can only look out the window enviously, and then quickly change the diapers and feed milk powder to her little brother.
Ms. Sun's heart hurt like a knife cut, and at this time she finally realized that she didn't have any plans, and the decision to have three children in a row was really irrational.
In the past, she did not think about this, only thinking that there were two big living people in herself and her husband, there was always a way to earn money to support three children, it was not a difficult thing, the older generation of people in the past could have more than one child in one breath, wasn't it also all raised?
But now I found that it was getting harder and harder for a family of 5 to live. Yesterday when I came home from school, my eldest daughter said to her, Mom, my good friend has gone to learn dance, I want to learn too, I want to go to class with her, dance together.
Looking at her daughter's innocent smiling face, Ms. Sun really couldn't say no. But when she thought of the few deposits in the bank card, she could only turn her face to the side uncomfortably and say, OKAY, when your mother is well, I will send you to learn dance, okay?
The daughter said yes happily, and then jumped to the bedroom to hug her little brother. Looking at the child's back, Ms. Sun burst into tears, she knew that it was too late to say anything now, but if she really wanted to do it again, she would definitely think clearly before choosing the child, otherwise watching the child suffer with herself, that feeling is not to mention more pain.
Third, the birth of a baby cannot change anyone's fate
In the old days, there was a saying among many people that having more babies would definitely change their destiny.
Even if our original family conditions are not very good, then after having a few more children, there will always be a child who will be able to become a talent in the future, so that one person can drive a whole family, and it can also be regarded as a person who has attained the Tao, and the chicken and dog have ascended to heaven.
However, today, such a statement is difficult to confirm, because in today's environment, educating children requires costs, not as in the past, free-range with babies, but also allows children to grow freely.
Like Ms. Sun, her family was originally in debt, and she even had three children in a row, partly because the couple had the idea of emphasizing men over women, and the first two children were girls, so the third child said that she had to fight again.
In the end, although the fight was successful, the result was not as Ms. Sun imagined, and she could live a happy life from then on. In fact, even her own children are dragged down by the couple's unwise decisions, and it is really painful to carry the burden of doing housework and taking care of her brother at a young age.
And all this is actually avoidable, we have to learn to be responsible for the people we love. This is true of partners, and it is true of children. Instead of letting your child come into this world in such a dark environment and accompany you to endure pain, it is better to meet a new little life after you have worked hard enough and made some achievements.