In "Chongqing Forest", there is such a classic sentence:
"There's going to be a date on everything where saury expires, the meat sauce expires, even the plastic wrap expires. I began to wonder, what else wouldn't expire? ”
In this world, everything has a shelf life, even if you put them in the refrigerator, you can only delay for a period of time, so there is no enduring love in this world, there is no unswerving heart.
And those so-called long-terms are nothing more than falling in love with the same person again and again, and being loyal to the same person over and over again.
In the face of things that have expired, we should have discarded them in time, but there are still some idiots in this world, even if the two have been disconnected for a long time, they are still unwilling to let go of each other, and even think that one day the other party will be moved by their own infatuation.
As everyone knows, such an act, in the end, is just a self-touching.
In fact, time is the best proof of feelings, if a person can leave you in the past years, it has long shown that he has no feeling for you, he will not fall in love with you again.
For example, in the TV series "Why Sheng Zhen Mo", Zhao Mosheng and He Yichen reunited after seven years, and the two people can get a good ending, but because they love each other and have not forgotten each other.
But in real life, most people after separation have long been diluted by the years, and the initial beauty has long been eroded by interests.
You have to understand that it is impossible for one person to break the connection, and when two people go their separate ways, at least one of them is unwilling to contact the other.
Some people will feel unwilling because they have paid too much, but in fact, there is really no need to worry about whether he has loved you, let's say that you were once in love, otherwise you would not come together, but now the separation, can not negate the past feelings, can only show that you are not suitable now, the feelings are no longer.
After the disconnection, don't do these two things, you can slowly put it down.
01: After the disconnection, don't cling to it, you can slowly let go
There is a Zen saying in Buddhism: "Clinging to one thought will be trapped in one thought; when one thought is dropped, it will be in the mind." ”
Many of the troubles in the world are unnecessary troubles, just because you can't let go, cling to a thought, and force yourself to suffer.
When it is time to persevere, it is chosen to give up, and when it is time to give up, it is to choose attachment, and the attachment after the disconnection is obviously the latter.
Knowing that this relationship has come to an end, but still firmly believe that as long as you persist, there will be a peak and a turn; you know that the other party does not love yourself, but still choose to deceive yourself, to create an illusion for yourself, a happiness that does not belong to you.
Zhang Xiaoxian once said: "A person's biggest shortcoming is not selfishness, sentimentality, barbarism, and willfulness, but paranoia about loving a person who does not love himself." ”
Indeed, the biggest disadvantage of a person is that he does not love himself, but clings to the wrong person.
After the disconnection, don't cling to the past feelings, you must understand that if you have a relationship, the fate between you will not be broken at all, and if you have no fate, clinging to the past will only make your life worse and worse.
If you want to let go, don't always cling to the past, love or hate, the encounter is a fate.
02: After the disconnection, don't be harsh, you can slowly put it down
After a failed relationship, some people will fall into a strange way of thinking, that is, harsh blame.
Maybe it's blaming yourself for not knowing people and making mistakes in the matter of love; maybe you blame the other party for being ungrateful and taking your own efforts and love for granted.
In fact, there is really no need to harshly blame the past people and things, otherwise, you will never be able to let go of this relationship.
Take the matter of Huo Zun and his ex-girlfriend Chen Lu several months ago, in that eight or nine years of love, each other's efforts should be willing, but after the breakup, the previous payment has become an item that can be clearly marked with a price, which makes people sigh.
The payment in the feelings is priceless, on the contrary, when the payment in the feelings becomes an item that can be clearly marked with a price, such sincerity makes people feel terrible.
There is no need to harshly blame your past self, even if you love the wrong person, it is just a life experience that can grow, not to mention, you have seriously loved a person, even if the result is not satisfactory, it is not a failure to live up to yourself and the years.
There is no need to harshly accuse others of not loving you, feelings are free, when others do not love you, it can only mean that you are not suitable, when others trample on your sincerity, it can only mean that this person is not worthy of your love.
Disconnection is not the best ending, but it is not the worst ending, you are just living your own life, so there is no need to cling to it, there is no need to be harsh.
One day, you will learn to let go and cherish in the long years.
I am Aya, a warm-hearted emotional writer, and I am so fortunate to meet you in this life! Click a note, let's grow knowledge together!
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