Text/An Dongyue
-
Good men in women's minds all have one thing in common: infatuation and single-mindedness.
Just like He Yichen in "Why Sheng Zhen Mo", he only loves Zhao Mo Sheng wholeheartedly, and after she went abroad without a message, he waited for her for seven years. He has a classic line: "If you have such a person in your life, then everyone else will become a general, and I don't want to be a general." ”
Such an obsessive and single-minded man is probably only in novels and TV series, and there is no such thing in real life. Because for men, love is never the first. What they want most in their hearts is money, power, status, fame and fortune. In their view, having these will naturally lead to love.
Of course, men will also have sincerity and will pay for love, but there is a very important premise, that is, this person and this relationship are profitable and worth looking forward to for him. When you can't give him anything, his love for you will quickly disappear, or shift.
Why is it that after many lovers break up, women are still immersed in the past and can't get out, but men have already started a new relationship? The reason is simple, men always know what they need most.
Most women have a common disease - the confidence of fans, always thinking that they are the person that men love the most and cannot forget, that is, the so-called cinnabar mole and white moonlight. At any time, as long as you hook your fingers, the other party will immediately come over and offer your hospitality. But in fact, what men care about most is always themselves.
In fact, whether a man has you in his heart or not, he doesn't care about you, look at these three aspects, you will know.
01. Will you be contacted voluntarily
People who initiate contact with you don't necessarily really care about you; people who never initiate contact you don't really care about you.
Some relationships are delicate, you can't get too close, and you don't want to break the connection completely. Occasionally send a message, a few simple chats, and feel comforted in your heart. However, if you have always been taking the initiative to contact the other party, the other party never takes the initiative to contact you, and only seems to talk to you enthusiastically when you send a message, then it is worth playing.
Life is like a drama, all rely on acting skills. Many people in the face of some delicate relationships, do not want to do too much, appear to be too cold and ruthless, so pretend to be enthusiastic, even if it is to give each other face, but also to leave some room for themselves, in case of need one day, you can also close the distance between each other at any time.
For this reason, every time you send a message, the other person will reply and act enthusiastically, but he just won't contact you.
There can be many reasons for not taking the initiative to contact you, the most common of which are two: one is that you are too busy, and the other is afraid of disturbing you.
However, at the end of the day, there is only one reason: you are not important enough in his heart, and he does not really care about you.
People who really care about you, even if they are busy, will take time to contact you and talk to you, and their hearts will be very warm.
People who really care about you, even if they know that they shouldn't contact you, and contacting you may disturb you, will still contact you carefully because they can't help but miss it.
If a man, when you look for him, he shows enthusiasm and always cares between words, but he never takes the initiative to contact you, then he does not really care about you, no longer have to have illusions, self-comfort, self-paralysis.
02. Would you like to meet you?
Have you ever had such an experience?
I would love to meet someone and go where he might go in order to meet him. Or, you are far away, but because you love him and care about him, you are not afraid of boats and cars, and you travel thousands of miles alone, just to meet him.
If a person is in constant contact with you, chatting with you, saying all sorts of nice things, but when you offer to see him, he finds reasons to shirk, or politely refuses, it is enough to prove that he doesn't care about you, at least not as much as you think.
You must know that it is better to say ten thousand words "I miss you" than to say "I come to see you", and to say "I will see you when I have time" a hundred times, it is better to really appear in front of you once.
Li Shangyin said: "It is difficult to say goodbye when we meet each other, and the East Wind is powerless. ”
Yes, for a true lover, how happy and rare it is to meet, how painful it is to give up. Only those who have no sincerity at all, who have never really cared, will have no idea whether they meet or not.
In fact, the saddest thing is not that the person you care about does not want to come to see you, but even if you take the initiative to see him, he is not willing to come out and meet you. Usually chat feels good, but at the critical moment to drop the chain. This situation fully proves that it used to be hypocritical and that he never really cared about you.
We often say, "It's better to see each other than to miss each other." ”
But in fact, this is a self-deceptive lie. If you really care about a person, you will definitely meet when you have the opportunity, and you will find an opportunity to meet if you don't have the opportunity. Saying that seeing each other is better than nostalgia, either because you want to see yourself and can't comfort yourself, or you don't care about seeing or not seeing at all.
If a man only talks to you in the air and does not want to meet you at all, it means that he does not really care about you, and you do not have to go into the drama too deeply.
03. Have the heart to know you
People who like you will be interested in everything about you; people who love you deeply will take the trouble to understand everything about you.
Like most of them are more superficial, interests are often very short, only deep love will be understood with the heart, no regrets to pay, long-term companionship.
Most men, no matter what they do, are very purposeful, including male and female interactions. He likes you, is interested in you, and approaches you just to see if you're really as he thinks you are. If it is not the same, immediately the interest is greatly reduced, no longer like, and slowly estranged.
Only when liking becomes deep love will he take the trouble to understand you well and understand you as much as possible.
Your preferences, your experiences, your thoughts, your goals, your pursuits, he will listen carefully to you and give you advice sincerely.
Your troubles, your sorrows, your concerns, your confusion, your confusion, he will listen to you patiently and give you comfort tenderly.
If a man only wants to talk to you about a love affair, he will not pay attention to your inner world, he likes most of your beautiful appearance, as to whether your soul is interesting, he does not care at all.
Women are full of fantasies about love, and the biggest fantasy is to get the full sincerity of a man, who not only loves himself deeply, but also knows himself very well.
However, the ideal is very full, and the reality is very bone. Men's sincerity is the hardest to come by, and men don't have much patience to understand a woman unless he really loves you to the bone.
Men who are willing to take the trouble to understand you may not really care about you. Men who don't bother to understand you must not really care about you, so they don't have to expect too much from this man.
epilogue:
Love and no love, in do not care, may be able to act, can pretend, but the real can not be fake, the fake real can not, women as long as a little more wisdom, strengthen analysis, pay attention to discernment, will not be led by the nose in the feelings.
May every woman be able to see the essence through the phenomenon, penetrate the man's heart at a glance, and then decide whether to continue to invest in feelings.
The rest of your life is expensive, and you have to find someone who really cares about you to live up to yourself.
-END-
Author: An Dongyue, a freelance writer, with warm brushstrokes, writes heartfelt words, and is willing to meet you in the deepest red dust. Welcome to follow.