Text: Xi Xihuan
Figure: Originating from the network If there is an infringement contact deleted
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Friend Gan Ning once asked a question, in the relationship, what does a woman want most? At that time, he thought that what women wanted most was a good material life, so when he interacted with his first girlfriend, he worked overtime to make money, desperately trying to give each other a better life.
For the marriage of two people, he did not even want to buy clothes for nearly a year, nor did he even want to go out to dinner with friends.
In order to be able to give the girlfriend the romance she wanted at the wedding, Gan Ning looked up a lot of information on the Internet and made a lot of preparations in advance.
But when he proposed to his girlfriend who had been in love for many years, he was rejected, and his girlfriend also took this opportunity to propose a breakup, and Gan Ning couldn't understand how he did so many things and paid so much for the future of the two people, even if he was tired and tired, he didn't think of giving up.
Why was it that he was mentioned by his girlfriend to break up? He asked his girlfriend for a long time and wanted an answer, but her girlfriend only gave him one sentence, "You don't understand me at all."
The girlfriend said that Gan Ning never understood what she really wanted, nor did she understand how much she needed him when she was sad, to put it bluntly, Gan Ning did not understand her mind, did not understand her everything.
When the two people first broke up, Gan Ning had a period of time, even did not believe in love, unwilling to get along with the opposite sex.
But later, Gan Ning also wanted to understand that instead of blindly paying in feelings, it was better to learn to understand the woman's mind first, only by understanding her mind and knowing what she really wanted, would she not make her pay meaningless.
Many men, after experiencing a failed love, tend to understand a truth, that is, what men should give to women in their feelings is actually a word, that is, "understand".
01 Understand her grievances and sadness
Women's emotions are naturally delicate, especially the women in the relationship, will become more sensitive, because the heart cares about you, so they will hope that you can understand all her bad emotions, rather than blindly accusing her of unreasonable teasing.
Many times, men feel that women want too much, they will be very tired in this relationship, tired means that the distance between two people is getting farther and farther, but also means that women no longer have so much attraction to men.
As a result, what women feel is the huge contrast between men, from being obedient and gentle and considerate when they first pursued her, to being impatient and even disgusted later.
But men have never thought about who brought women's grievances and sadness to her, and many times, behind women's unreasonable teasing, what is hidden is her repeated tolerance and patience with men.
It's like Ganning's first love girlfriend, when Ganning is busy at work and can't accompany her, when she is sick and needs him the most, he impatiently says that he is working overtime.
So in the end, even if Gan Ning made enough money, even if he felt that he had the ability to give her the best life, he still did not get her heart, but lost her.
What a woman wants is actually not much, it is very simple, that is, you can understand all her bad emotions, and you can tolerate her and care for her when she needs you most.
Only men who do this can truly understand women and can completely conquer women.
Colleague Sun Ling is a happy little woman in everyone's eyes, already a mother of two children, but she is still spoiled like a girl by her husband.
Compared with other married and fertile women, Sun Ling has a lot less helplessness and forbearance, in marriage, she can unscrupulously express her thoughts, can boldly release her emotions, because she always knows that there is a person behind her who has been supporting herself, he understands all his sadness and grievances, so when she encounters ups and downs and setbacks, she has never been afraid.
Some people may say that although such a woman seems to be happy, she will never have the opportunity to grow, in fact, it is not, just because she has been full of love, so the woman's emotions will be peaceful, and she will become more and more rational when looking at things, which is a kind of growth in itself.
02 Understand what she needs
There is a word in the feeling, called accurate payment, obviously, the feelings need two people to pay in both directions, but how to pay, what to pay, but it is very important.
I once saw a man's complaints and complaints on the Internet, he said that he had paid too much for his girlfriend, gave up the stable job in his hometown, gave up his hobbies and interests, and even gave up the opportunity for further study.
But in the end, what he did not expect was that his girlfriend not only did not appreciate his efforts, but felt that he did not have his own principles and opinions.
The man feels puzzled, he does not understand why he has paid so much, the woman is still not satisfied, he will greet the woman when she is sick, and will send her a supper when she is working overtime.
But the woman said that when she was sick, what she needed was not the care and greetings on WeChat and on the phone, but the care he could take care of by her side; when she worked overtime, she had a stomach upset, but what he sent was spicy and greasy.
Men will give women a lot of gifts, but never once really ask her what she really wants, or even two people together for more than two years, men don't even know what a woman likes to eat the most.
So after the breakup, the man reflected on himself, he didn't feel that he was wronged, because he really didn't understand what she really wanted in the relationship.
If he understood, he wouldn't let her down, nor would he let her feel that he hadn't been careful with her, so when he reappeared in front of the woman, the certainty in his eyes made the woman feel that he seemed to be a little different.
After two people start over, the woman feels the change in the man, the content of the date is no longer that he decides to do it alone, he will start to care about her choices when eating, and most importantly, the man gives her the sense of security and satisfaction she wants.
What a woman wants is not an expensive gift, because no matter how expensive the gift is not as good as a careful preparation, the man must understand that no matter how much you can give, if it is not what she needs, then your payment is ineffective.
Want the love between two people to go further, men should not blindly pay, but to spend some effort to understand what the woman is thinking, what she really wants, so as not to let the woman more and more disappointed in herself.
The man who can really grasp the woman's heart never relies on external materials, nor is it rhetoric, but he can understand women with his heart and feel what women really need, so that he can get the response he really wants in his feelings.
END.