This is the 528th original of Dumb Dad
Dumb Daddy Parenting Special Author: Lin Zishu
Hello everyone, this is Dumb Daddy Parenting.
When I came home from work and saw my son playing games in his bedroom, I was furious after a tiring day and asked him how long he had been playing, and my son said that it had been almost two hours.
Because I was very tired, I did not reason with him at that time, but let him stand at the root of the wall and reflect.
My wife came back from work and saw the scene and asked me what was wrong.
I didn't say angrily: "It's not because your son, after school and doesn't do homework, actually played games for more than two hours, it's really angry at me." ”
As soon as I finished speaking, my wife said: "No, isn't the anti-addiction system upgraded, and now that the supervision is so strict, how can he play for two hours? ”
At this moment, I realized the problem and asked my son what was wrong, and he bowed his head and said, "I rented a game account outside, and I can play as I please." ”
After my son finished speaking, I was eager to go up to a shoe sole, but fortunately I was stopped by my wife.
Originally, I thought that the state adjusted and strengthened the anti-addiction system, and the children could not play unscrupulously, but they did not expect that there were really policies on the top and countermeasures on the bottom.
Some time ago, the People's Daily published an article entitled "Online Games Are Hot, How to Solve the "Hidden" Worry", which clearly pointed out that the situation of young people's addiction to online games is still serious, and the anti-addiction effect needs to be improved.
In fact, if this is the case, the anti-addiction system cannot become a decoration, otherwise there will be no harm and no benefit.
If you want to keep your child from indulging in games, it is not a matter of one person at all, and I personally feel that we must consider it from three aspects.
01.
Increase the intensity of anti-addiction and correct loopholes in a timely manner
Recently, a "60-year-old flower armor old lady, three o'clock in the morning ranked with the role of Zhao Yun to take five kills, friends who are familiar with "Glory of the King" know that this level is very high, a photo came out, instantly triggered a hot discussion among netizens.
What the hell is going on? Is the big mom addicted to the game, can't get up in the middle of the night to show off? Or the underage child is playing, she just brought a human face, for a while everyone did not know what was going on.
Soon, Tencent responded officially, saying:
From March this year to the present, this game account has triggered face recognition verification a total of 17 times, but it has passed smoothly. Even after the recent new anti-addiction regulations officially came into effect, it was able to pass the customs smoothly.
To put it simply, from a technical point of view, it is my own game, of course, it does not rule out that "others have represented faces", but it is really impossible to judge now.
If it is really the old man himself, then it is really admirable, because he does not have this strength at all, but if it is to brush the face of others, then what is the use of the anti-addiction system?
Admittedly, the strengthening of the anti-addiction system is to restrain children so that they do not indulge in games and waste their studies. When the policy came out, countless parents clapped their hands and cheered, but they did not expect to be happy too soon.
Bear children are not easy for us parents to deal with, although they are not interested in learning at all, but as long as they talk about games, then their IQ even exceeds Einstein.
In the strategy of dealing with parents, the most common practice is to register with the parents' mobile phone documents, and then pestering the grandparents to brush their faces instead.
In addition, on the Internet, there are also some e-commerce platforms that provide rental number services, as long as you spend a small amount of money, you can play freely, and you absolutely cannot touch the anti-addiction system.
It is precisely because of this service that children play games more conveniently, and the anti-addiction system has become a decoration.
Therefore, in order to make the anti-addiction system play a role, it is necessary to severely punish unscrupulous platforms, cut off the business of renting and selling game accounts to minors, and let them fulfill their due social responsibilities.
Only in this way will the anti-addiction system play a role, and the problem of children's games can be relatively solved.
02.
Kids are obsessed with games, exactly
On June 18, 2018, the World Health Organization officially listed gaming disorder as a kind of mental illness, which is simply a disease in which children are obsessed with games.
If the harm is so great, why are online games so attractive to children? Can they sleep and forget to eat, or even abandon their studies?
As parents, we must find out this reason, otherwise it will be a palliative or a delay in the child's life.
Recently, I read an article on the Internet and felt that the author's analysis was very correct, and we could understand these problems.
First of all, the game has a strong response and can well satisfy the child's heart.
The world of children is actually very simple, they are not as complex as us adults, there is no thought to stress, when the game is responded to, then their hearts are satisfied, naturally will be in love.
Secondly, children have a sense of accomplishment in the game, which can make up for the gap in reality
At this point, I think the author is very right, most parents only care about their children's academic performance, as long as the child's grades are not good, then they will completely deny him (her), and after a long time, the child will not find the value of his own existence.
But in the game is different, here he is the protagonist, can completely follow his own ideas, can find a sense of belonging, get psychological satisfaction.
Again, the lack of emotion makes them feel warm
Many parents think that as long as they are around their children, they are giving him companionship, in fact, this is wrong, although parents are around their children, they do not give their children care and love psychologically, and do not know what the children really want.
Objectively speaking, compared with material satisfaction, children may need more real companionship from their parents.
Sometimes, the child will express his inner feelings, hoping to attract the attention of his parents, but if you ignore it, then his inner pain will increase, choose to escape, and eventually replace everything with games.
In fact, many times, children do not have to play games, but only an outlet to satisfy their inner feelings.
If parents can understand and give them good love, then they will naturally not indulge in the illusory online world.
If you play games against children, if parents just blindly block, then it will only make the parent-child relationship worse, the most effective anti-addiction method is not to block, but to lead by example to help children develop good habits.
03.
Good habits are the wealth of a child's life
There was such a sentence in the CCTV documentary "Mirror":
"Every child is born with a blank piece of paper, the parents are the painters, and the key to what the white paper becomes is the parents."
Many times we are like this, when the painting is not well drawn, we first consider not our own technology, but complain that the white paper is not good enough, it is the white paper that affects our level, which is really ridiculous.
We never want to help children develop good habits, but when children are obsessed with games, do not listen to discipline, and have a bunch of bad habits, we always think that the child is wrong, but in fact, we are wrong.
The famous educator Ushinsky once said:
"If the child can develop good habits, then the habit will not be able to enjoy the interest brought to himself for a lifetime, and if you develop a bad habit, he will pay off endless debts all his life." 」
Let the child develop good habits, parents can lead by example, do not think that they are parents, just double standards for children, if you insist on doing this, then it is to lift a stone and drop it on your own feet.
So what are good habits? There are three main aspects of the habits that you feel good about:
First, the habit of active learning
When the child is small, the parents should not be pampered, but to give them rules, and strictly implement, once the child develops the habit of active learning, then as a parent will not be so tired.
For example, the diving queen Guo Jingjing attaches great importance to this, in order to develop the habit of active learning for children, even if Grandpa Huo Zhenting comes to see the child, she is not allowed, unless the child must first write homework before playing.
Second, the habit of managing time
I believe that many children have procrastination, if Monday needs to turn in homework, then the child almost does not write on Saturday, always have to delay until Sunday night to rush to make up, time is long, more procrastination.
Many children are like this, parents do not rush to get up, they feel that it is okay to be late for a few minutes, there is no concept of time at all, and when playing games, they do not consider time, only consider whether they can play cool.
Generally speaking, children do not have a concept of time, which requires us to give them a clear concept of time, responsible for supervising him to complete each plan, if you can do it, then the child will develop the habit of managing time by himself.
Again, get into the habit of reading
Being able to play games for a long time is largely due to the abundance of time, as parents we can change the child's interest, when the child falls in love with reading, then the game will not have time to play.
Here, it is important for parents to lead by example, just imagine, after work, you lie on the sofa and play with your mobile phone comfortably, but let your child read, is this possible?
Therefore, to let children develop the habit of reading, parents must first like to read.
In this way, CCTV host Bai Yansong did a good job, he liked to read very much when he was a child, and slowly developed the habit of reading, so that he has today's achievements, under his influence, his son also likes to read, how can he have time to play games?
The former Soviet writer Sergei Mikhalkov said:
"No matter how interesting a child's home and school may be, if you do not read some beautiful, interesting and precious books, it is like being robbed of the most precious wealth of childhood, and the loss will be irreparable."
Raising children is really not easy, I hope that in the days to come, you can really give love and care to children, let children feel their own value, help them get rid of the impact of the game, and take the road to the future, which is the best wealth for children.
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About the author: Lin Zishu, a newspaper reporter, a media journal writer, a daily expert, I have a pen to take you to the red dust.
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