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Tormented by cancer for 20 months, her last words left for her husband were heartbreaking!

Established in 2008, Hunan Cancer Hospital Hospice mainly provides end-of-life care, psychological care and social support for terminal cancer patients with dying cancers who are expected to survive only 3 to 6 months.

Since its establishment, it has accompanied more than 4,000 people until they reach the end of their lives.

Ms. Xu, who is suffering from cervical cancer, and Ms. Zhu, who is suffering from lung cancer, will use this place as the last stop of their lives, waiting for the last bell of life in the care of nurses and families.

Xu Shengnan, 63, a native of Xiangyin, Hunan Province, was diagnosed with mid-stage cervical cancer in 2004. At the time of the first chemotherapy, his son Huang Huai was still studying, and he remembered that his mother had been in good health since then.

After chemotherapy, a stable life lasted for 15 years, and after 15 years, the haze once again hung over the family, which was not rich.

Tormented by cancer for 20 months, her last words left for her husband were heartbreaking!

(Xu Shengnan's husband, Huang Renjie, is feeding her)

In August 2019, Xu Shengnan suffered from left lower abdominal distension pain, the hospital misdiagnosed as a urinary stone, there was no sign of improvement in surgical treatment, and a month later, he had multiple acid swelling pains in the iliac bone and lower limbs. Half a year later, the family went through several rounds to finally confirm that Xu Shengnan's cervical cancer had recurred and the cancer cells had metastasized.

In April 2020, Xu Shengnan, accompanied by his family, was admitted to Hunan Provincial Cancer Hospital for chemotherapy. Huang Huai remembers that her mother did 6 times of chemotherapy, which was helpful to the condition at first, and then slowly became ineffective. The re-examination found that Ms. Xu had multiple soft tissue density lesions on the left pelvic wall, parailiac vessels and retroperitoneum, and the medical record wrote, "considering metastases".

Luck no longer came as expected 15 years ago, the medical record reads: "Continue chemotherapy, but the patient's body pain has not been relieved", Huang Huai realized that his mother may not have much time, and finally, he applied for hospice services for his mother.

Tormented by cancer for 20 months, her last words left for her husband were heartbreaking!

(The nurse at the hospice took Xu Shengnan's hand and comforted her)

"Every time she suffers from pain, the cancer cells are metastasizing, and the metastasis can't be cured." Huang Huai said. When she was diagnosed, she knew that her mother would not recover and just wanted to prolong her life as long as possible. He didn't want to be a man without a mother.

After her mother's cancer recurred, Huang Huai returned to her hometown from Changsha to accompany her. Huang Renjie said that because his son always had to take leave, the unit dismissed him. In order to facilitate chemotherapy, Xu Shengnan once lived in her daughter's home in Changsha, and last November, after entering the hospice care stage, she returned to her hometown.

Tormented by cancer for 20 months, her last words left for her husband were heartbreaking!

(Huang Renjie brushing his wife's hair)

Huang Renjie sat on the edge of his wife's bed almost all day. After his wife became seriously ill, she spoke quietly, and his hearing gradually weakened, and sometimes he could only do it in a hurry. The wife lay on the bed, humming at times, her limbs pale and slender, and he could only squeeze her hands over and over again.

In recent days, Huang Renjie has often shed tears, and he knows that his wife's life is running out. For more than 40 years, the two of them had not been separated, and when they were young, they made some money spinning hemp together, built the house they have now, and later had children, and they have been rooted in this place all their lives and have never left.

Now the house is old, and the people are old.

Tormented by cancer for 20 months, her last words left for her husband were heartbreaking!

(Watching his wife deteriorate, Huang Renjie often shed tears)

Children have their own homes, and their lives are far away. Huang Renjie looked at his wife, always felt that she had some regrets, repeatedly asked, no result. She just looked at him dumbfounded, for a long, sickly chant, "You just take care of your body." ”

When she was young, she loved to nag like this.

"I won't have any discussion about anything since." Huang Renjie lowered his head. His wife is gone, and the most important subject of his life is to learn to live alone.

The rain in the south is always non-stop in March and April, and Xu Shengnan's illness is getting worse and worse. Every day before going to bed, Huang Renjie wiped her feet, brushed her hair, and gently stroked her hair. The wife needed to take painkillers regularly every day, and he did not remember well, so he wrote the time of each medicine and the name of the drug on a small note.

Tormented by cancer for 20 months, her last words left for her husband were heartbreaking!

(Huang Renjie wiped Xu Shengnan's feet)

Near the end, Xu Shengnan was occasionally delirious. When she was sober, she always said that if she was not cured, she should not be cured, and she should not waste money. Huang Huai knew that her mother was uncomfortable, and he was even a little glad that her mother was occasionally confused, so that she would not have to care about anything, at least her family would continue to accompany her.

Watching her mother's body become thinner and weaker, but it also happened to Mao Xiaoya's body.

Mao Xiaoya's mother, Zhu Yuan, was diagnosed with lung cancer in May 2019. In the winter before that, she had said that she had back pain, and when she was diagnosed, she was already a "multiple metastases in both lungs.". After chemotherapy did not work, at the end of 2020, Mao Xiaoya also applied for hospice services.

Tormented by cancer for 20 months, her last words left for her husband were heartbreaking!

(Peng Wanglian, a doctor at the hospice, instructed Zhu Yuan in medication)

Zhu Yuan was very calm at first, "it is sick", she said without pain, as if those moments of being tormented by illness can be easily passed. According to the doctor's request, she took targeted drugs and did chemotherapy, because it was uncomfortable, chemotherapy did not continue twice, and then she went to radiation therapy, but the effect was not good.

"Can't get up, no energy, don't want to eat" Her condition deteriorated two months ago, and she "didn't expect it to turn out like this all of a sudden."

Mao Xiaoya remembers that her mother called to say that she was on her way to run an errand the day she was sick. After comforting her mother and hanging up the phone, she cried in spite of the others.

Tormented by cancer for 20 months, her last words left for her husband were heartbreaking!

(Speaking of her mother's condition, Mao Xiaoya couldn't help but cry)

Since childhood, Mao Xiaoya and her mother have been like friends, and she has shared with her mother all kinds of things that happened in school when she was studying. In the first year of follow-up consultation, the mother was able to go to the hospital for examination and take medicine by herself, but then slowly, often felt pain, and needed to be accompanied. Xiao Mao also found that for what she said, her mother changed from responding enthusiastically to only nodding her head, and even fell asleep without making a sound.

"She may be in better condition today, you will be happier with her situation, the situation is not good, even when you do not have the strength to speak, you can only accompany her." 」 Mao Xiaoya said that before her mother fell ill, she weighed more than 130 kilograms, and now she only weighs 94 kilograms.

Every Tuesday and Friday is the day of medication, and family members can come every ten days to receive free painkillers. Because of receiving painkillers, Mao Xiaoya had contact with the staff of the hospice, who often asked about her mother's condition and adjusted the dosage of the drug according to the situation.

Tormented by cancer for 20 months, her last words left for her husband were heartbreaking!

(The dose of painkillers taken by Zhu Yuan is larger)

Mothers used painkillers in large doses, from the initial 10 mg to 120 mg. Sometimes she went to get her medicine and the other patients' families were surprised. But without taking medicine, her mother's painful appearance made her heart ache, "If she doesn't eat, she will fidget, walk around, cry, cry, I believe this kind of pain is not something that we ordinary people can understand." ”

Yu couldn't bear it, and in order to get more people's care for her mother, Mao Xiaoya finally applied for a nursing service, "because cancer is really difficult to cure, rather than this, it is better to make her last life less painful." ”

Tormented by cancer for 20 months, her last words left for her husband were heartbreaking!

(Group photo of Zhu Yuan's family)

My father was far away in Beijing, and in order to take care of his mother, his aunt and grandmother moved into their home. The mother had a poor appetite and her teeth were lost due to treatment. Every day at 6 p.m. When Mao Xiaoya came home from work, grandma would turn on the sound of the TV and the family would eat and chat, which was a rare and ordinary good time.

Peng Wanglian, a doctor at the Hospice of Hunan Provincial Cancer Hospital, said Xu Shengnan, who was on the hospital bed, had told them that she felt very guilty because of the disease, which dragged down the family.

Peng Wanglian told the social worker Zou Ran about the incident, who was responsible for the psychological comfort of the patients. During a visit, Zou Ran told Xu Shengnan in her ear that the family came to the world as fate, before the child was small, she took care of the child, and now she is sick and the child comes to take care of her, it is mutual.

Tormented by cancer for 20 months, her last words left for her husband were heartbreaking!

(Zou Ran, a nursing home nurse, called to inquire about the patient's condition)

Repeating these words, they hoped to alleviate Xu Shengnan's guilt a little.

Peng Wanglian came to the hospice after graduating from college, and she thought that for patients with terminal cancer, the psychological problems caused by the emotional effects may be more serious than the physical condition, and the mental health profession she studied would come in handy.

In order to alleviate the patient's fear, the family may not directly tell the patient about their condition, so when going out to visit the patient, Peng Wang does not even wear a white coat. When she sees patients, she usually chooses to accompany them quietly, so that they know that they are not alone on this road, Peng Wang said: "What we do is a crutch of the patient's family." ”

Tormented by cancer for 20 months, her last words left for her husband were heartbreaking!

(The doctors and nurses of the hospice are preparing to enter a patient's home)

Peng Wanglian also found that people have misunderstood about taking painkillers, afraid that they will rely on drugs, and think that "once you take painkillers, it may be a countdown to life." Some patients can endure and endure the pain until the disease has been tortured to the point that he can't stand it anymore, and then he will accept it.

On the road of hospice care, Peng Wanglian has accompanied the patients for 5 years, she knows that as a healthy person, everything she has now is an impossible luxury for patients, so she wants to play the value of this job, and she has learned a lot from these patients, such as: adversity may also be a landscape in the eyes of others.

Zou Ran has also been on the road of social work for 13 years. Over the years, she had seen different patients who were in a hurry, leaving only their families who were reluctant to give up. In order to alleviate the grief of their families, they regularly counsel their families.

"We have a lot of patients, even if it's the end of life, the family is still reluctant to talk to him about death, just to reassure him that everything will be fine." In fact, patients and families know that this is a very pale comfort, but everyone can't help but do it involuntarily. Many times we take an attitude of avoidance, denial, and procrastination towards death, and the family does not talk to the patient until the end of his life, in fact, if he talks earlier, the patient will have more time and energy to do some things that he wants to do but has not completed. Zou Ran said.

Tormented by cancer for 20 months, her last words left for her husband were heartbreaking!

(List of patients in Hunan Provincial Cancer Hospital Hospice)

Zou Ran feels that the significance of this job is to make people no longer afraid of death, "because on that day, everyone can know that in the last journey, there is someone who can help you and can accompany you to go on, and you are no longer lonely, scared, and nervous."

Tormented by cancer for 20 months, her last words left for her husband were heartbreaking!

*The content of this article is a popularization of health knowledge and cannot be used as a specific diagnosis and treatment recommendation, nor is it a substitute for face-to-face consultation by a practicing physician, for reference only.

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