I believe that most boys chase girls in order to establish a long-term relationship with her, which actually has a gradual process. But there are many boys who are too anxious, so they often use a good way to pursue girls.
I am obviously shy, and I have to find a way to buy various high-end gifts for girls; I obviously have limited time, but I still reply to all the news of the girls in seconds, and find a way to pick up and drop off girls to and from work uninterruptedly; I don't do anything every day, and I am full of thoughts about how to catch this girl, how to be with this girl...
Pursue girls in this way, even if you catch up, your relationship will not last long.
Because your state when pursuing this person has far exceeded the state of your normal life, you will pursue very tired, after establishing a relationship, this way of getting along will become unsustainable;
And what way you rely on to chase the other party, then you have to rely on what way to continue to maintain your relationship, so in this case, if you are tired and sluggish, the other party will feel that you don't care about yourself, don't cherish...
Therefore, chasing girls is not that you can't be good to girls, it's not that you can't pay, and you can make the other party like you without paying much, which is an emotional white prostitution behavior.
Of course, we have to pay, but this payment must be within the limits of what we can accept:
I originally had a wealthy time every day, this time I can choose to play games, I can also choose to chat with you, so at this time in order to pursue you, I chose to chat with you often;
Originally I had to pass by your house after work, and anyway, I had nothing to do after I got back from work, so at this time I chose to send you home, which did not affect my normal rhythm of life;
Originally, I also had to eat and shop with my friends on the weekend, and I didn't want to stay at home, so at this time, I asked you to come out to play, and we spent the weekend together, which was also a good choice...
This kind of effort, in my opinion, is reasonable and deserved.
I know that writing it this way may be different from the "pursuit" in some people's minds, after all, in some people's eyes, pursuing a person must mean doing a lot of things for this person that they would not do before, which means that they must give and sacrifice themselves... This idea is very wrong: because once any relationship is established, it is necessary to return to a normal life, and the more it does not affect your original state of life at this time, the more comfortable and long-lasting the relationship will be for the two people to get along.
But love is originally the condiment of life, is a spice of our daily life, if the time and energy we put in this matter has interfered with our normal life, then this matter is not too noisy?
If a person needs us to put in so much time and energy, and needs us to attract at the expense of our normal life, then do we need to think hard about whether this person is really the right person for us?