When children cry, many parents do not know what to do?
Some parents allow their children to cry and ignore their children, some parents beat their children until the children are quiet, and some parents hug and coax to meet the requirements of their children.
Some say that letting children cry and vent their emotions can release the pressure of children. Some people say that you can't rely on the child to cry and vent your emotions at will, and it will be difficult for the child to discipline in the future. Some people think that it is very pitiful for children to cry, and agree to their children's requests, as long as they do not cry.
Have parents ever encountered the problem of their children crying, who is right, who is right, who is justified?
In fact, when children cry and vent their emotions, how parents deal with it lies in correct judgment, can not be generalized, can not be arbitrarily determined which method is right and wrong, according to the facts, correctly judge the root and needs of children's crying, according to different things at that time to correctly guide children to cry and vent emotions.
We need to know that anger and crying are one of the most common expressions of emotions, and we often had this situation when we were young, and people's emotions affect our work life and physical and mental health.
Crying is the channeling and catharsis of anger, and has become one of the most common emotional expressions in children.
However, we need to guide our children to properly vent their anger, rather than crying and venting their anger as they please.
Parents can take different approaches to their children's cries for different children, different things, and the following:
First, the child itself is introverted, and the child can appropriately let the child vent his emotions.
Introverted children bury pressure and bad emotions in their hearts, do not know how to release, coupled with their own personality is more introverted, not good at expressing to others, accumulating too much negative energy will lead to physical health impact.
If the introverted child is suppressed too tightly, it will only make the child more and more introverted, and the child should be allowed to vent his emotions appropriately, and find out in time why the child will vent his emotions, do a good job of ideological work for the child, dig out the child's inner world, and let the child open his heart... Since then, the child's introverted mind has naturally slowly changed outward.
Second, when the child cries and vents his emotions, try to guide the child to learn to take the way of talking.
When the child is in trouble, tell the child not to pass on his bad emotions to others, not to reprimand and insult the other party for no reason, and try not to use irrelevant people as "punching bags".
Children should be told that they can take the way of talking, so that it is easier to win the sympathy of others, and the child's bad emotions can be cathartic in time.
On the other hand, you can also ask your children to talk to friends who play well, and parents should also have more patience with people around them to guide.
In this way, it can avoid the child's dissatisfaction with things, pass it on to playmates and interpersonal interactions, and reduce the child's conflict with others.
Third, when the child cries, we can also use the method of diverting the child's attention to vent the child's dissatisfaction.
Children cry, sometimes may be unhappy, sometimes may be unreasonable demands can not be met, sometimes want to achieve their own requirements through crying.
At this time, some positive activities can divert the child's attention.
Let children participate in more sports and recreational activities, such as dancing, listening to songs, writing, drawing, etc., which can well divert children's attention and focus on sports and health.
Fourth, when the child cries, parents cannot raise the child to simply suppress the child's emotions.
Everyone has the right to emotional catharsis, especially negative emotions. Some parents love face, just blindly suppress their children, indiscriminately, want their children to behave excessively in front of others, not allow a little crying, and the final result will affect the healthy growth of children's psychology.
As far as children are concerned, many parents always let their children's emotional control of themselves tend to be silent or choose to suppress in order to highlight their children's upbringing, which is not advisable.
I don't know that behind the child's choice of obedience and silence, it may be that the child will have communication barriers in the relationship between parents and children, teachers and students, and friends in the future.
For children, excessive suppression of negative emotions, all self-digestion, it is easy to fall into the right and wrong are borne by themselves, do not dare to say their correct views out loud, and even will not belong to their own responsibilities are also taken over, so that the child grows up to go to society, resulting in a lot of adverse consequences.
Fifth, when the child cries, you cannot simply judge the crying as the child's temper is good or bad.
In real life, parents can not blindly think that children cry, that is, bad temper.
For children, emotional catharsis is normal, especially the venting of negative emotions is particularly important, as long as they know how to digest.
Must not be overly suppressed, otherwise it will lead to different diseases, which is not conducive to health.
Throughout a person's life, seven passions and six desires are normal physiological phenomena of people. And rationally looking at the emotional venting in life is positive and desirable, and we must not blindly think that others' normal emotions are vented, and arbitrarily give children a bad temper evaluation.
Sixth, after the child cries, appropriately remind the child to learn to control emotions.
The advantage of controlling emotions is that in public, people can feel more decent, more stable and mature. The disadvantage is that the child needs to suppress his emotions.
The advantage of venting emotions is that you can release the child's heart, and the disadvantage is that in the eyes of outsiders, I am afraid that I do not understand your behavior, which is easy to cause misunderstanding by others, thinking that it is a "bear child".
Therefore, parents should do a good job of ideological work for children after crying quietly, analyze the reasons for each crying, and analyze the children's right and wrong.
Children who are understood by their parents will become relatively stable in their emotions. It is conducive to the child's next crying time is no longer too long, the degree is no longer too exaggerated, and it is conducive to the child's emotional control better the next time he cries.
When the child cries, teach the child to communicate emotions in an understandable language.
The way humans respond to anger, communication and expression is the most appropriate. Repression, retaliation, avoidance, self-aggression, these methods will only make the anger not really resolved.
Therefore, children should be told positive coping styles, and children should communicate and express clearly in appropriate language, and express the causes of anger in easy-to-understand language, rather than verbal imperatives and threats.
The language of orders and threats, even crying and playing tricks, will only cause the two sides to have a bias in understanding, and will not play a role in alleviating anger and solving problems.
In short, when the child is crying, parents should not be too nervous, they should be keen to find the reason for the child's crying, for the cause and purpose of the child's crying, to help the child vent his emotions in the right way.
Children learn to control their emotions, need a growth process, need parents' rational analysis and patient companionship, do you think it makes sense? You are welcome to leave a comment in the comment area below the article to discuss, and everyone can discuss with each other.
I believe that as the child grows up day by day, the child will vent his emotions less and less through crying, the child will only be able to control his emotions more and more, and the children will become more and more great, congratulations to the children!
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