In the past year, we have written a lot about falling in love, but the most discussed backstage is the 30+ single anxiety.
Recently, there is a variety show that seems to have filmed the appearance of "30+ mature love": not taking the initiative before the goal is clear, crazy "playing straight ball" after meeting the person you like, and loving and not being able to exit with dignity...
Even the annoying love shura field can be handled very decently by this group of 30+ men and women.
The observation room star Wang Ziwen even broke out the golden sentence: When I was in my 20s, most of the love I talked about was OK; after 30 years old, I had the ability to live better and then talk about feelings, which would be more pure.
This variety show was stamped by netizens as "the best love complex in history". Coinciding with Valentine's Day, we talked about "mature love" with "Semi-Mature Lovers".
20+ boys and 30+ boys
What's the difference?
Nine of the 10 guests are 30+, the youngest being 27. Both men and women, they have the typical state of most 30+ youth: stable career, independent consciousness, uncompromising, unrefined, long-term empty window, fear of marriage, etc.
What's the difference between 30+ men and 20+ men? Different types, different views of love. Why is "Uncle" so popular? After watching the male guests of "Half-Acquainted Lovers", the city painter seems to have realized some reasons.
At present, Wang Nengneng, the director of the hot CP advertising planning of Variety, × food blogger Lola, known as the "new love variety ceiling". In this "love game" of your comings and goings, Wang Nengneng's performance has made many netizens exclaim: "Bravery and responsibility are the most valuable qualities of a middle-aged man in love."
When facing the return of "love enemies" and the beloved object of dating, you can calmly handle it, but also properly show your nervousness about each other.
But more often, "playing straight ball" is his love secret. Eliminate the possibility of others, in the right atmosphere, seriously confess to girls, and quickly and timely give each other a sense of security.
Over 30 years old, we are no longer a blank piece of paper, but a piece of scratch paper, but it is not a good idea.
In the past, idol dramas seemed to show us a lot of "standard answers to love", but the most heartwarming thing was still the simplest way to get along.
Ryan Wong, founder of the couture suit brand. The goal is clear, and rather than a practical marriage, I only want to find someone who can trigger the same frequency resonance.
The interlocking "digging pits", the love of smart people, is not necessarily about winning or losing, but about enjoying the pleasure of the problem solving process and feeling the fun of chess opponents.
The "push and pull" is handled quite appropriately, so that netizens have sighed that "the push and pull between adults is also too head-on."
△ Chat history of Huang Ryan and female guest Luo Ying.
After determining our inner feelings, we can see the less and true side of this 30+ mature man, and there are many words that can express love but are not greasy.
△ "Get up and find her first" This seemingly bland little detail makes many people sniff this candy fiercely.
30+ men, also appear exceptionally brave on the road to love. Yu Yue, in the face of the other party's sudden confession, and the huge differences in the experiences of the two sides, has concerns but does not give up.
△ In the face of the female guest suddenly admitted that she has a child, he still subconsciously gives better feedback without marriage and childbearing experience.
They are all emotionally stable mature 30+ men. There are also some common points, such as very crisp when refusing, never leaving "fish space", and between the same sex, it is more mutual appreciation, avoid conflict, but listen to other people's affairs more, and maintain moderate social distancing.
30+ "mature girls",
Have a rich and powerful heart
In ordinary love, 30+, divorced and baby, funny women... But anyone who is labeled with one of these labels seems to become unwelcome. But Lola, a food blogger who also has these labels, has unexpectedly become the most popular woman in this variety show.
Savoring, leaving aside the "sweet sister" appearance, many of her "love suggestions" are very correct, and people can quickly appreciate her independent and powerful heart.
"Don't look at the love skills shared on the short video, those things simply can't be practiced."
"I think that the fact that girls give up their careers, I sincerely do not recommend it from the bottom of my heart."
"Don't compromise on what you don't want to compromise because of love, but still love others well", "I do a lot of useless things, because in the process I feel a lot of wonderful moments in life and life." 」 ”
These are not simple slogans, they are a summary of their past lives, and they are also their practice.
Another highly discussed female guest, Luo Ying, is a financing consultant of the International Financial Development Institution, who will make a form for each male guest, truly practice horizontal and vertical comparison, and show the "rationality" of 30+ women quite obviously.
But when encountering an "opponent" with double arrows, you can also make no secret of it and actively give feedback to the other party.
30+ women, letting go of the "quit" is also generous and decent, not to embarrass each other seems to be the skill of the only middle-aged people. For them, they are more concerned about their own improvement than "talking about love". Focus on adjusting yourself and always look forward to love.
Seeing the rejection of Zhou Nan and Tong Yao comforting each other. We can see that they seem to be no different from 20+ girls, with the same troubles and happiness, but they are more aware of their requirements and standards, more decisive and braver.
△ Mutual encouragement between the same sex is really healing.
They are very aware of society's evaluation of 30+ women, but they are not anxious, even if they are wandering, they can muster up the courage to move forward, even if they are rejected, they can release a transparent and relaxed feeling from the body, these mature performances come from the inner confidence in themselves.
△ Yang Mengjing, a female guest in the variety show, is as sassy as she is on the inside, and can interact naturally with male guests, even if she "loses", she will ask clearly.
30+ in love,
Why is it so head-scratching
In 2021, many film and television dramas have focused on "older love", from "You are my city pool camp" at the beginning of the year with "Older First Love", to the end of the year" "Xiao Minjia" Zhou Xun and Huang Bo told 40+ love... Grounded and rational "older love" seems to have become a ratings code.
△ Last year, "Xiao Min's Family" made many netizens feel for the first time that the love between middle-aged men and women can also be very sweet.
Why is older love so addictive? Seeing some of the interactions between the male and female guests of "Semi-Mature Lovers", the cultivation of a sense of emotion, and the way they ended their ambiguity, you may be able to understand something.
Mature men and women are more aware of what they want. Zhou Nan and Wang Yucheng, after chatting about the ex-boyfriend, immediately knew that both sides were looking for someone to take care of themselves that was not so suitable for each other, and ended the ambiguous state without hurting each other as much as possible.
△ 30+ men and women, will not be confused by the "comfort" of the moment. "Heartbeat" and "comfort" must be there.
In a state of ambiguity, do not shy away from discussing the problems that may arise in love. Put the problems of "long-distance" and "divorced with children" in front of them. But it won't be easily promised.
In the face of sweet two-way heartbeat, Luo Ying said that she could not fall in love and must get along again, and Ryan did not easily make a promise when she proposed a different place.
△ In the face of the problems that arise, it is not easy to say "forget it".
The "goodbye" of the acquaintances is also handled very frankly, Yang Mengjing "will ask clearly if she loses", and Jin Shun does not forget to send gifts at the end of the ambiguity.
In this 30+ male and female romance, they determined that the rhythm of the heartbeat was obviously not as fast as the 20+ male and female love complex, but their persistence and hesitation more verified their previous "resistance to the world" and did not make up for marriage.
Perhaps, as Wang Ju said, the love formula is about 40% bitter, 40% sweet, 10% spicy, and 10% sour. It also elaborates on the meaning of "sour, sweet and bitter": spicy = passionate, sweet = comfortable, bitter = quarrelsome, sour = jealousy and sense of crisis.
However, 30+ men and women, after having a certain life experience, these emotions are properly placed in proportion. It seems realistic, but when it comes to falling in love, it must be "high-quality love".
●
20-year-old love, fast on the top, faster on the bottom.
30+ love, may be able to meet the peak, evenly matched, less impulsive, but more comfortable and decent.
What makes people feel most comfortable is that in this environment created by "Semi-Acquaintance Lover", there is no female competition, and there is no hormone explosion, and the attraction is not a good body and appearance, but the collision of spirits.
We can also learn some emotional secrets from other people's feelings, such as the observation room star Wang Ziwen can't help but start to learn to summarize: in the relationship, boys will not reflect on themselves, but girls often deny themselves, at this point, girls can learn from boys.
Sweet love is not the privilege of 20+ youth, "mature love" is not only the exclusive of 30+ youth, each stage of the feelings have a different experience, we have to learn is to adhere to the belief in confrontation with incorrect marriage, maintain the courage to dare to rationally pursue love at any age.
Editor Today Mai Cuiying
Cover image source variety show "Semi-acquainted lover"
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