1, the husband uses the U disk on the computer at home, after the completion of the right button in the "pop-up", suddenly saw the wife running to the back of the chassis and so on. The husband wondered, "Why?" The wife said

1, the husband uses the U disk on the computer at home, after the completion of the right button in the "pop-up", suddenly saw the wife running to the back of the chassis and so on. The husband wondered, "Why?" The wife said, "I'll wait for it to pop up and then click, don't bounce to the ground and break it!" "The husband has a black line on his face.

2, went to the mother-in-law's house to help plan peanuts, at noon the mother-in-law made braised ribs, ate almost, I saw a piece of ribs on the plate, I clipped the ribs and was about to eat, the daughter-in-law suddenly said: "You will wait!" I don't think the color of this rib is quite right! "I hurriedly put the ribs on the plate. The daughter-in-law picked up the ribs and ate them directly. I......

3, "Old Iron, why are you in a hurry to sell the house, this house has not lived for three years?" "Because I don't want to listen to the sound of peeing next door every night, and then I can't help but get up and pee." "When you're done peeing, do you have to get up next door to pee again?" Hahaha. "No, the neighbor sleeps with earplugs at night."

4, 2 was about to speak, just listened to her viciously said: "U disk, the company's core technology is on the top, you took away for 3 years, the company has gone out of business." I have to come out and get married..." Wait, she seems to have no money? Then she's pretty, 3 years older than me, can this be the case?

5, this National Day someone asked me, why don't I go out to play. Is it because there is no money? Me: Shake your head. Is it because there is no object? Me: Is shaking your head because you're ugly? Me: Shake your head because... Before he finished saying that I patted a brick, you temede knew it, do you have to admit it one by one to stop it?

6. Student A: "It's about to be an exam, do you have any plans?" Classmate B: "Practice sprinting and eloquence." Student A: "What does this have to do with the exam?" Classmate B: "Yes! When the results come out, I will run to beat my father and talk to my mother. ”

7, hot summer, the air conditioner in my house is broken, I want to find a master to repair it. Therefore, I sent this matter to My boyfriend on WeChat. My boyfriend said to me: What to do with the master, how much does it cost, wait for me, I will repair it for you! As a result, the boyfriend repaired it for two hours and repaired it, and he also took advantage of it once. In the evening, I asked the master to repair it, and it cost more than 200!

8. During military training, a military song competition was held in the cao field, standing on a trapezoidal stand, and a certain class was lined up in front to sing, and an instructor of the class volunteered to stand in the last row and wave the military flag. Because he was relatively short, when we finished singing and walked down, the students in the class next to us asked us: "How did the military flag planted behind you shake?" ”

9, go to the shoe store to see a pair of shoes, like it, the shopping guide came over very enthusiastically said: like you can try me: no, look at the line, shopping guide: no sir, like to try it. Well, when I take off my shoes, there will be a shopping guide left in the store...

10, yesterday Tanabata said to her husband: You should give me a big gift, after all, there are not many women like me who are so gentle and lovely, kind and caring for the family. My husband patted my head and said: Well, yes, baby waiting ha! Looking at him out the door, I was full of joy. Fantasizing about what kind of surprises will be given to me... After a while he came back and handed me a mirror. Say: Take good care of yourself, without the life of a white swan, don't always think about flying into the sky

11, cousin came to my house at night to eat, my mother clipped a fish head for her, my cousin immediately stuffed it back, my mother asked her why she did not eat, she said: The last time I ate at my uncle's house, my uncle also stuffed me with a fish head to eat, and when I finished eating, I looked up and ate the whole table.

12, a couple walking on the road, the woman sneezed, the boyfriend asked: Cold? F: Hmm. The boyfriend said: Wait for Ang, I have medicine at home! My girlfriend thought to herself, it is really good for me, and she will give me medicine to eat! While waiting for the boyfriend to come back, the boyfriend said: Let's go. Girlfriend asked: What about medicine? The boyfriend said: I ate it! You have a cold, I have to prevent it, I can't let you infect me!

13. This morning when the subway security check was passed. My thermos bottle contained boiling water. As a result, the security guard asked me to try it! I didn't care to ignore him. As a result, the security guard said loudly: That big aunt wait a minute. Nima brain jerked open the bottle cap and poured it over, Big Mama Nyima. See clearly, the old woman is only twenty-eight this year.

14, one day with my mother to watch the news, the host said: "There is a teenager who used the Internet for a few days to make half a million yuan..." The mother turned to me and said: "You look at people!" The moderator then said: "But what awaits him will be the punishment of the law!" My mom: "..."