01
There is a saying that "people who are poor should not go to their relatives, and horses should not go to the soldiers." ”
When people are poor, don't go to your relatives, because your relatives absolutely look down on you and even satirize you. When the horse is not strong enough, don't go out to fight, so as not to drag your feet.
The most realistic thing in this world is the eyes of "relatives" on you.
In Chinese society, the vast majority of people attach great importance to their feelings for relatives. But what they don't know is that relatives are often the most affectionate kind of people.
You think that outsiders are thin-hearted, but you don't know that your relatives are even more affectionate. You think passers-by are realistic, who knows your relatives are more realistic.
To tell the truth, the relationship between relatives and us is not much better than the relationship between outsiders and us. It's just that relatives are related to us by blood. This is where the trouble lies.
You neither dare to disobey others nor dare to offend others, and in the end, the so-called "kinship" will become the shackles that will bind you for the rest of your life. If you don't recognize this reality, then you are prone to losses.
The so-called "kiss is not a kiss, non-pro but pro." ”
The more people who look like relatives, the more they will do things that are not like relatives. The less like a loved one, the more they will help you for the sake of humanity or interests. Everything is not as simple as we think.
The following types of people are not worthy to be your "relatives", may you understand.
02
People who are used to "kinship kidnapping" don't deserve to be your relatives.
We've all heard of the word moral kidnapping. Among the moral kidnappings, there is such a phenomenon called "kinship kidnapping".
Some of your relatives, once they encounter any problems, they will definitely kidnap you with "affection". At this time, what should you do? You don't have any way.
Take the "help" thing, your relatives beg you for help, don't you help? You definitely need help, and you won't refuse. Why? Because you are afraid of a rift in the relationship between the two parties.
Chinese has a characteristic, that is, it is afraid of a crisis of "family affection". In this way, others will pinch your weaknesses. In the end, what can you do? I can only obey.
I have met some people who use "family affection" to trick their relatives in order to borrow money, and even later do not pay back the money. In the eyes of these people, as long as they occupy the moral high ground, the other party does not dare to act rashly.
This is the most despicable place of human nature.
03
People who do things "cross the river and tear down bridges" are not worthy to be your relatives.
The so-called "ungrateful people of the world are heartless people." ”
In this world, all ungrateful people who do things across rivers and bridges are emotionless people. Interacting with these people is like "sending sheep into the mouth of the tiger", and you will eventually gain more than you lose.
When it comes to "ungratefulness", why are relatives more desperate than outsiders?
There is a saying that "the nest is horizontal, and the outside is instigated." "Outsiders will be afraid of you, at least others will not easily confront you." However, relatives will not fear you, because others have found out your details, so they will only treat you with absolute affection.
If you interact with outsiders, you can either talk about feelings or interests, and you can also wave your hand away if you really can't talk about it. However, when you interact with relatives, you can't simply talk about feelings, and you can't just talk about interests. So, what can you do?
People with ill intentions will use the intersection of "interests" and "feelings" to create sugar-coated shells that trap you deeply in them and end up doing you great harm.
Therefore, in the face of ungrateful people, it is better to stay away and not to get too close.
04
People who are "too snobbish" are not worthy to be your relatives.
There is a saying in the "Augmented Sages": "The poor are in the downtown area and no one asks, and the rich have distant relatives in the mountains." Don't believe but look at the wine in the feast, the cup first respects the rich. ”
You're so poor that even if you live by his house, no one else will look at you. You mix well, even if you live at the end of the world, others will find you.
This is where the "rich or not" gap lies. And many of your relatives will only look at your financial interests to be human. So, how exactly should you be good?
It is better to be human or realistic. Don't believe in "blood is thicker than water", don't believe in "eternal affection". We can only believe that it is the norm to worship the high and step low.
However, it is better for relatives to pay more attention to feelings, help each other when there is difficulty, and icing on the cake when there is no difficulty. It's just that this is all our wishful thinking.
The "snobbish eyes" of this world will always exist, and no one can stay out of it.
05
People who "can't see you're doing well" don't deserve to be your relatives.
In terms of knowledge, someone has said that the more people who have a certain relationship, the more they don't want you to live well.
Someone else has a certain relationship with you, but he wants you to get worse and worse, and doesn't want you to get better and better. This shows that human feelings are as thin as paper.
Relatives, because you have a certain blood relationship, so others will compare you for the first time. If you beat you in comparison, others will be particularly happy. On the contrary, others will hate you.
It's like if your child gets good grades, but your relatives are particularly disgusted with your child, and even go around belittling your child, what do you think?
In one thought, he was nothing more than "envying, jealousy, and hatred" for my children.
The feelings are weak, not terrible, at most do not communicate with each other. But if the human heart is ugly, it is particularly terrible. Perhaps, it will distort the affection of this world. That's all.
Wen/Shushan has deer