Gently I went, just as I came softly; I beckoned softly, making the clouds of the western sky. --Xu Zhimo
When I was in school, I read Xu Zhimo's "Farewell to Kangqiao" and was amazed by his literary style, and when I got to know this person, I was indignant about his emotional experience. As a poet, he is competent, but as a husband is unqualified, he left his wife, traveled far and wide to pursue Lin Huiyin, and chose to divorce his wife after she became pregnant, which made people see a man's irresponsibility.
In 1897, Xu Zhimo was born in a wealthy family in Zhejiang, the Xu family is a wealthy businessman of the times, and It is rare that Xu Zhimo, who drinks from snacks, does not have bad hobbies, coupled with literary talent and talent, making him a famous local brother. And his family is not only rich, but also full of cultural atmosphere, the famous writers Qiong Yao and Jin Yong are his cousins and nieces, respectively.
Such an excellent boy was naturally favored by countless sons-in-law families, and in 1915, the Zhang family married the Xu family, and Zhang Youyi married Xu Zhimo. Xu Zhimo was also a little curious about this unmasked wife, but after seeing the ordinary appearance on the wedding night, he began to dislike the arranged wife.
Soon after marriage, Xu Zhimo used the excuse of studying abroad to come to England away from Zhang Youyi, and the days of studying in Cambridge were Xu Zhimo's happiest time, he met Lin Huiyin, the love of his life, and launched a fierce offensive regardless of his family lineage. From writing love letters to poems, from walking to rafting, he tried his best to please Boleyn Huiyin. Even for this reason, he did not hesitate to divorce Zhang Youyi, who had just become pregnant.
In 1921, the pregnant Zhang Youyi took a ferry to England to look for Xu Zhimo, but she did have a look of impatience and coldness, and it was obvious that Xu Zhimo thought that Zhang Youyi's arrival disturbed him. A year later, Zhang Youyi, who had just conceived her last son, was forced to divorce Xu Zhimo, and Xu Zhimo could no longer bear this relationship. He left Zhang Youyi alone abroad and returned to China on his own.
However, after the divorce, Zhang Youyi began her own new life, she first studied early childhood education with the help of her eldest brother, and still took care of her children and Xu Zhimo's parents after returning to China, until 1953, the happiness that belonged to her finally arrived. She met a local Chinese medicine practitioner named Su Jizhi and started a family with him. After marriage, he lived happily for 19 years, and died without illness at the age of 88.
On Zhang Youyi's tombstone, there are four large characters carved: Su Zhang Youyi. People have always thought that Zhang Youyi is a vassal of Xu Zhimo, but she uses her own story to tell everyone that she is herself, and she has her own happy life. Posthumously bearing the surname of her husband Su Jizhi on the tombstone is undoubtedly the best irony of Xu Zhimo, who abandoned her.
And Xu Zhimo, as early as 1931 because of the plane accident was killed, his second wife Lu Xiaoman is even more miserable, not recognized by the Xu Zhimo family, after death is not allowed to enter the Xu Family Ancestral Hall, the ashes are not collected and lost, until 23 years after his death was buried in the Hangzhou Dongshan Cemetery of the Crown Tomb, so far no one cares.
Although Zhang Youyi's life was implicated by Xu Zhimo, she eventually had her own family and career, which was not worth it. And her inspiration to us is very critical, women will never be vassals, only to improve themselves, will be favored by others. And her evaluation of being abandoned by Xu Zhimo at the beginning is also very graphic:
"I am a fan in autumn, only used to drive away blood-sucking mosquitoes. When mosquitoes bit the moon, the owner tore the fan to pieces. ”