After the death of Zhao Yiman at the age of 31, his only son was very well taken care of, why did he choose to hang himself at the age of 55
The younger generation's understanding of Zhao Yiman began with an article in a primary school Chinese textbook --- "Rough Porcelain Bowl".
Dong Biwu once wrote a poem for Zhao Yiman: "The resistance to the Wo did not win and became a prisoner, and he did not yield to severe torture and curse Kou Vengeance." Since he is a good son and daughter of China, the blood of the Pearl River has a history of thousands of years. ”
She sacrificed heroically for the country, and her name has been passed down through the ages, and she can sing and cry.
In her short thirty-one years of life, she has devoted one percent of her loyalty and strength to her cause and country. Compared with her own family, she gave up her small self to become a big country, and left too little and too little. Especially in the life of her only son, she hurried by, too late to give him the love and care of an ordinary mother, but it affected him in the dark.
Growing up in the rush of life
Zhao Yiman's only son, named Chen Yexian and nicknamed Ning Er, was born in 1929. It was the second year after Zhao Yiman returned from his studies at the "Sun Yat-sen University in Moscow, SOVIET Union." Zhao Yiman and her husband both graduated from the Whampoa Military Academy and met from studying in the Soviet Union. But the fate of these three people was only a few years under the national disaster.
The "918" incident in 1931 led to the outbreak of the War of Resistance Against Japan. Her husband was sent abroad on a mission, and Zhao Yiman, who had recently given birth to a son, was immediately sent to the northeast by the organization and joined the ranks of the War of Resistance Against Japan without hesitation. In the brief time between chen Yexian and his mother, who was only two years old, he never left any memory, let alone had the opportunity to experience the care of a mother. And this short two years is the only memory of the mother and son. And this is the difference between this and the son, which is a lifetime.
In Chen Yexian's childhood memories, there has never been a figure of a mother. Entrusted with the care of the uncle's family, he and his mother were all over the north and south.
Fostered in his uncle's house, he has a lonely personality and a heavy heart. In the special period of national turmoil, the age when he should have been pampered by his parents in the arms of his mother could only be spent in loneliness and helplessness. Even if his uncle's family regarded him as their own, whenever the cousins gathered around their aunt to share interesting things in the school, how could Xiao Ning'er, who was sitting next to him, not miss her biological mother who did not know where she was? The secrecy of the organization's work left him with little knowledge of his mother. Maybe his uncle showed him the picture of his mother deliberately taking three mouths to manage, but on the photo paper without any temperature, a child who had almost never seen his mother, facing the photo, how to piece together a three-dimensional appearance of a mother.
This is how I spent my teenage years. After liberation, Chen Yexian was sent by his aunt to study at Chinese Min University.
Spiritual influence of motherhood
In 1955, Chen Yexian successfully graduated from the Department of Foreign Affairs of Renmin University. In the same year, confirmed by relatives and organizations, Chen Yexian learned at this time that the big hero Zhao Yiman in the movie screen was his own mother.
A child who knows his dearest relatives must be obtained from cruel film and television works, in which only he can understand the grain and miscellaneous.
After graduation, Chen Yexian had become the age of a male eldest husband, born in the peaceful years when his mother's generation had just exchanged blood for blood, he may be more able to empathize with the pain of his mother's resolute acceptance of the separation of flesh and bones; endure the harsh life of the anti-war environment; bear the pain of the evacuation of the cover troops and be wounded; even survive the coma and be captured, a series of inhuman torture to force confessions; and finally the appearance of being brutally killed... All this is in the imagination of the mother and child connection in the movie, which makes the mother's experience gradually clear but also cruel.
In the face of the great cause of liberation, the absence of more than twenty years is insignificant.
As the son of such a heroic figure, his heart must be full of emotions, and his heartache is greater than pride. Among the relics left to him by his mother, he received only a brief last word, a small note, just an ordinary and ordinary word informing him that he was leaving:
"Ning Er, mother is really sorry that you did not fulfill your educational responsibilities. ......”
This is the last paragraph spoken to her son by a mother who cannot give her own son much real love for the sake of the cause of the country. But what she can give is far from what an ordinary mother can give. And this may be the reason why he resolutely refused to receive his mother's pension.
"How can I spend that money, my mother's sacrifice for the country, can not be measured by money." Chen Yexian said.
After experiencing such shocking news, he was about to graduate and he must have wanted to make a difference. Otherwise, he would not have stabbed his mother's name on his hand and would have been awake at all times.
Chaotic periods of unambitiousness
After graduation, Chen Yexian was assigned to the Beijing Industrial School as a political teacher, teaching students the Principles of Marxist Philosophy. He's the kind of guy who won't take care of himself. Unkempt and informal. After employment, he married and had a daughter and started a family. Perhaps he did not learn self-love and arrange his life, which became more and more evident in his hasty marriage with his students. Personality incompatibility, decentralization of rural labor gathering less and more... All exacerbate the unhappiness of the marriage.
Perhaps it is the lack of a cared for character from childhood, not enough to have the strength to love, in a marriage that does not know too much, all kinds of problems appear one by one. The wife has suffered from mental illness due to many reasons such as children and family, and although she has remarried before and after, the entire married life, coupled with economic problems such as the inability to reasonably arrange wages, has not improved the married life.
Later, China experienced many major events and special periods.
Between 1959 and 1961, the Great Leap Forward and a number of related policies led to a national food crisis. Many areas became famine-stricken areas.
In an interview, Mr. Yuan Longping said of that period:
"I gave you an example, you are young and don't know, three years of difficult times, starved to death tens of millions of people. The Great Leap Forward cut down all the trees to smelt steel, destroyed the ecology, and in 1959 there was a great drought, which basically did not harvest for a year, and starved 40 or 50 million people to death. I saw 5 hungry people on the road, falling next to the field, under the bridge and on the side of the road, I saw it with my own eyes, it was very miserable. ”
Although Chen Yexian is in Beijing, he is also well aware of the miserable situation of the people in his hometown. In 1960, he wrote a letter directly to Chairman Mao, describing the situation at that time and bluntly pointing out some of the party's erroneous decisions in decision-making. The chairman was very angry when he saw it, but when he saw that he was Zhao Yiman's son, he did not continue to pursue, and later Chen Yexian was assigned to work in the six machine tool factory of the Mechanical and Electrical Research Institute.
During the Cultural Revolution in 1966, because of the reasons why his father was framed, he wrote several letters denouncing and wanting to clear his father's wrongs, but it caused dissatisfaction among the Cultural Revolution leading group, and he went through "downfall", escape, cattle shed isolation, censorship and criticism... persecution.
The end of life
The decade-long Cultural Revolution ended in 1976, during which time it is unknown what kind of persecution Chen Yexian experienced. Entering middle age, he may be sad and ashamed of his half life, perhaps he is resentful of his own ambitions in the era of resentment, and even compared to his mother's life of singing and crying, his own insignificance... However, none of this mattered one day, 8 years later, Chen Yexian hanged himself at the age of 55.
People don't know if he was thinking about his mother before he died, and what kind of mood and courage he had to end his 53-year-old life.
Perhaps the world will always remember his great martyr mother--- Zhao Yiman, but he was also a hot-blooded young man who had never received a mother's pension even if he was a little sloppy.