Yesterday I listened to an education lecture where education experts said that for children aged 14-18, it is very important to have a righteous, positive idol. Because this period is the key period for the formation of the child's three views.
Deeply believed!
In fact, I still think that not only adolescence, but also infancy and adolescence are equally important. A person's growth process is created by the people and things he has experienced, the books he has read, and the places he has been! At different times, the heart-touching events and characters encountered will deeply affect a person's personality, and the impact on a lifetime is very important.
I remember when I was a child, when I was twelve or thirteen years old, I watched a TV series "The Legend of Yi Wei Haoke", and my friends after 7080 should have an impression. I was particularly impressed with one of the villains inside. She is a secret agent of a Japanese secret intelligence organization, ruthless and ruthless, killing people without blinking, but at the same time she is a small woman who is extremely obsessed with her lover Tai Yi Katsuo to the point of forgetting herself. Until now, I can't say why I have a crush on her. On the one hand, I may think that her appearance is very cool, I also learn from her, every day in a circle above the head of a ponytail, often carry a short dagger in the hand (of course, not a real dagger, just a ruler), from time to time to pose a classic shape, immersed in it, not happy. On the other hand, her dedication to love (at that time should not have known what love was) and the kind of dedication that attracted me. So much so that later I advocated a free, free, uninhibited style, largely from the influence of more sand on me.
Later, when I was in middle school, the most influential people for me were Sanmao and Hao Sijia, the heroine of "Gone with the Wind". At first, I liked to read Sanmao's books, but I was attracted by her experience, and later I looked at it more, and I was subtly influenced by her personality and worldview. So much so that for a while even the style of writing was imitating her.
Scarlett Hao was the person who had the greatest influence on my life. Although she is not an idol, she is bold, does not accept defeat, and perseverance and optimism in the face of adversity are all things I learned from her.
A child is a blank piece of paper on which to scribble something becomes. Therefore, in the adolescent period, what kind of person to meet is very important, the so-called power of example is powerful! You see the little boy, from a very young age, even if the road is not good, but he prefers to chase children older than him, which seems to be an instinct.
My family's big treasure is an introverted child, from childhood to adulthood has not clearly expressed what kind of person he likes. When he was twelve or thirteen years old, the husband of a colleague was a teacher at a vocational high school who had led Dabao for a while. The teacher was humorous and funny, very gentle and elegant, and was a very idle and wild crane, a person who had no quarrel with the world. Dabao, like a loyal little fan, adores him and always likes to follow him. I am very grateful to the teacher for guiding and teaching Dabao during that time.
Now that Dabao is seventeen years old, he seems to have no idols. There is no imagination about what kind of person you want to be in the future. We parents, very ordinary, do not have the power to let our children as role models. Of course, I definitely hope that he is better than blue out of blue! But I really hope that there is a person who convinces him, who makes him worship, who becomes the guide of his soul, so that he can find the direction of life as soon as possible and can work hard for it.
There are also some "overheated" star chasers in life. I think this is also understandable, after all, this is caused by the psychological characteristics of adolescence. As a parent, to be moderately guided, I think this is only a short way to find spiritual sustenance. Let your child know that at any time, the ego is the most important! Idols are just a benchmark, a kind of guidance, and most importantly, they still have to go their own way in the end. Don't lose yourself and pin yourself on others. Learning the strengths of idols and using them for yourself should be the right posture!