The spouse is your subconscious
Some couples are similar at first, but after being together for a long time, differentiation will also occur, and one person develops some psychological activities and another person develops another part of mental activity.
People's repressive parts, the parts that the spouses have, may or may not accept. If it is accepted, the two people together will be very harmonious; if it is not accepted, there will be constant conflict.
Despite the constant conflict, nothing can be separated. In other words, people are not in conflict with their spouses, but with their own subconscious. Only by "reconciling" with one's own subconscious can the marital conflict be eliminated.
Explained by the personality mask theory, part of the mental activity forms a mask, and the remaining part is another mask, the former is A, the latter is -A. Since A and -A are opposites and prone to conflict, you can only choose one or the other. If the A mask is chosen, the -A mask will be suppressed.
In addition to your spouse, your children are also your subconscious.
Chinese parents all hope that their children will become dragons and their daughters will become phoenixes, that is, they will use their children as their own stand-ins, projecting one of their inadequate (that is, repressed or semi-repressed) masks to their children, so that their children can complete their unfinished mission. Some parents do this consciously, some parents are unconscious, and the latter is called "your children are your subconscious."
There are also some parents who find that their children do not meet their expectations at all, so they are very disappointed in their children, and they try their best to reform their children, and they turn to psychologists if they can't reform themselves. This is also called "your children are your subconscious." Why? There is a parent, she is very good, she hopes that her child is also very good, the child is not yet born when the prenatal education began, after the confinement to take the child to learn early education. When I was in kindergarten, my children were very good, but in the middle class, children had "behavioral problems", did not abide by discipline, often robbed other people's things, quarreled with children, loved to cry, and sometimes peed their pants. Parents take their children to see a psychologist, and psychologists say that it is related to family education, but parents think that there is no problem with family education.
The fact that the parent herself is excellent indicates that she has an excellent molecular mask (A). She is definitely very repulsive to the mask of backward elements (-A), she hates backward elements, afraid of becoming backward elements, so she strives to forge ahead and strive to be excellent elements. The better she was, the more repressed the backward molecular mask became, and finally even she herself was deceived, thinking that she did not have a backward molecular mask. But judging from her performance of striving to be excellent and afraid of being backward, the mask of backward elements exists in her.
Now, the mask of repressed backward elements is projected onto children. Maybe the child is not so backward, similar to other children, but the mother has a strong backward molecular mask, which is very sensitive to backward molecules, and immediately identifies the backward molecular characteristics of the child and wears a backward molecular mask for the child. If she accepts the mask of the laggard, she will allow the child to fall behind and then accompany the child to grow up. The problem is that she does not accept the backward element mask, she wants to "eliminate" the child's backward element mask, so she enters into a state of hostility with the child's backward element mask (and also with the child). In a hostile state, the child is very injured, he will certainly resist, and the result is getting worse and worse.
Your parents are also your subconscious.
Many people hate their parents very much, think that their parents can't do that, they are very unaccustomed, try to reform their parents, and as a result, the relationship with their parents is very tense and often conflict. When a person feels that his parents are not right, it means that he has projected the mask of the wrong molecule (-A) onto the parents. Thinking that he is right and his parents are not right will try to reform his parents, and he himself uses the correct molecular mask (A). In fact, everyone will make mistakes, and people who think they have always been right suppress the mask of wrong molecules, and then project it onto others, and are allergic to other people's mistakes.
Your siblings are also your subconscious.
They are all inherited from their parents, but the personality differences between siblings can be very large, because everyone only "inherits" part of it and suppresses the other part. If you put brothers and sisters together, it will be closer to the "family personality". Since each person inherits only a part, the repressive part is reflected in others, so brothers and sisters are subconscious to each other. If the sibling relationship is harmonious, it means that everyone accepts that they do not have (in fact, repression) and the other person has a part, accepting the difference. If brothers and sisters are incompatible, it means that everyone does not accept their subconscious.
Your co-workers are your subconscious.
Unless you don't have feelings for him, neither like nor hate. If there is, he is most likely your subconscious. If he makes you love and hate, then he must be your subconscious.
Your enemy is also your subconscious.
People project their mask of non-acceptance onto others, and naturally they will not accept that person like a mask that does not accept themselves, and then reject him, hate him, and hit him. If the other person also projects a mask of their own non-acceptance onto you, the two people are on the same page.
To sum up, the people around you are your subconscious. They are your stand-ins, your projections, your mirrors, they externalize your mask so that you can see yourself. Whether you like them or hate them has nothing to do with them, it just means that you like yourself, or you hate yourself, that is, to accept yourself, or not to accept yourself. You are the root of all problems. Your attitude towards the people around you reflects your subconscious, and at the same time your subconscious mind creates your relationship with others, and only when a person grows and improves internally can he have a harmonious relationship with others - how others treat you is taught by you.