Ins, the painting style of the family with two babies is always brother hurt sister, brother sticks to sister, brothers love each other, sisters are sweet and lovely... In short, it is a quiet and good look.
Look at their two babies, every day is either quarrel or fight, and they sue each other at every turn... The younger brother refused to concede defeat, the older brother refused to give in, and the brothers quarreled all day long, and they were bombarded by quarrels every day. It is not right to make a judgment, and it will always be exchanged for the other side to become more and more intense!
The big treasure and the second treasure in the family are still in love with each other one second, and the next second is an endless quarrel, a lonely wolf howling, how to deal with it? Don't worry! Children quarrel, parents should learn to "lazy" Oh.
1, the two babies quarrel, adults do not rush to intervene
"My brother grabbed my toy, but I obviously played with it first."
"This is my toy, now I want to play, my brother won't give it to me!"
In fact, in the face of war between children, it is difficult for parents to be absolutely impartial. And you can't completely let the small one not provoke the big one, nor can you completely let the big one blindly let the small one. How do you get it?
Some people say: Children are born diplomats. They know the best way for them, and without adult intervention, they will solve the problem in their own way.
Image source: @Visual China
So, a very important principle for resolving a child's dispute is: observe, but not rush to intervene.
If you can, try to let go of your anxiety, and it's best to let them resolve the controversy on their own. Because of the commotion, the children are also solving the problem in their own way. If parents intervene at this time, judging who is good and who is bad will stifle the child's opportunity to resolve the conflict. So, try to let your child use his own method to communicate and solve the problem.
But one thing to be aware of is that if they're about to get into a fight or are already firing, or start destroying things, or throwing things at each other, then you have to step in. Seriously warn children not to use violence, and understand what happened, help solve problems and educate.
Of course, it is also possible to encounter a situation, that is, no matter how you judge, the child will not accept it, or argue more severely. At this time, you can stop the adjustment, punish them to go to the corner to calm down for a while, and then solve the problem after the mood calms down.
2. Respect every child and understand their psychology
Each child is an independent individual and is not a "replica". Moreover, due to different ages, the performance of the two children is different, the growth environment is different, and the development is different.
Therefore, when criticizing and educating children, remember to use the language of comparison. For example: your sister is very well-behaved, not at all as noisy as you; your brother did not often get his clothes dirty when he was a child; your brother is not as naughty as you, how can he beat you...
Brothers and sisters often compare criticism to make them have a negative impact, but also produce jealousy, which increases the incidence of quarrels and fights, and is not conducive to the intimate relationship between brothers and sisters.
Image source: @Visual China
3, there are no children who do not quarrel, only parents who will not deal with
Siblings are not born with how to love each other. As the saying goes, there are still bumps in the teeth and tongue, not to mention children with different personalities. There are two or more children in the family, and in the process of getting along, there will inevitably be quarrels and fights. They are familiar in quarrels, understand in collisions, and intimate relationships gradually take shape in the process.
When problems arise, the parents' way of educating will affect the way the children get along later. Different personalities have different ways of getting along, so as long as the child is happy, the less the parents do, the better.
Conflicts between children are all too common. With contradictions and disputes are not terrible, parents should learn to skillfully guide and resolve.