What is addiction?
It is not the same as muscle memory, muscle memory is people for a long time to carry out an action, over time, the muscles have consciously formed a habit.
Then after a period of time, when you don't do it, when you pick it up again, it is still the same as when you first performed the action.
Muscle memory comes from physical manipulation, which can allow for time intervals, while addiction is a dependence from the mental level, which cannot tolerate intervals.
Just like the relationship between fish and water, the relationship between plants and air, when you have it, you feel ordinary, but as long as you lose it, you will feel at a loss.
In a relationship between the sexes, if one person can make the other person "addicted" to themselves, then it means that the person's position in the relationship is unshakable.
As a woman, if you can reach such a state, you don't need to suffer from gains and losses, and you don't need to deliberately pursue love.
Psychological research has shown that if you want men to be "addicted" to you continuously, learn to "take three steps" and you can do it.
The first step is to grasp the rhythm of the chat and not to respond to everything
The effect of continuous satisfaction and the effect of accidental satisfaction are different from those of cloud mud.
One is to get used to it and there will be no more surprises; one is to be in a state of semi-fullness, and every now and then satisfaction will ripple.
This shows that when we chat with men, the second return and the return of the message every other time are not the same result.
Zhang Xiaoxian said: "A woman's reticence is much more important than a person's dowry and beauty. ”
In a relationship between the sexes, even if a woman loves a man deeply, she must restrain her feelings.
Even if the inner emotions are already in a turbulent state, the surface is still light and breezy.
Because people are like this, they will no longer have a desire to learn about the things they know one hundred percent, and they will be interested in studying things that they are not sure or do not understand.
And when we chat with men, don't go back in seconds, and don't stare at the mobile phone screen all day long, the other party sends messages cheering, and the other party does not send messages to think wildly.
Everything needs to be grasped at a good rhythm, so that under the maintenance of freshness, men will continue to be addicted.
The second step is to preserve your own mystique and not be too honest
Some people say that love needs to be honest, it should know everything and say everything.
However, if sincerity loses its measure, it will become the fuse that destroys a relationship.
You must know that the reason why a relationship can be maintained depends on attraction, and the source of attraction is freshness.
Freshness is only available because it is not too familiar and not very familiar.
So, once we're too sincere, it means that we're in a state of complete transparency to each other, unattractive, and even less fresh because we don't understand.
There is a law of two-eight in psychology, which refers to the 20% of a thing that plays a decisive role, and the remaining 80% of the part is meaningless.
For feelings, no matter how much we say, it makes sense to keep our own 20% mysterious feeling.
In this way, men will want to further satisfy their intellectual curiosity because they do not understand, so that they will slowly become addicted.
As Cai Kangyong said: "Overzealous is not a way for a person to maintain a good relationship, it is best to get along with people 'coldly' and maintain a certain sense of distance from the outside world." ”
The third step is to follow your own feelings and not put the cart before the horse
We have thought countless times, what did we come to this world to do?
It is to listen to the best songs, wear the best clothes, eat the best food, and let yourself experience the most real happiness.
Instead of seeking perfection, it is not a song to meet, it is not a deliberate flattery, and it is not to make others happy and choose to wronged themselves.
In life, I have seen too many girls:
In order to buy a pair of valuable sneakers for their boyfriends, they work part-time, but they are reluctant to buy even a lipstick of two hundred yuan;
After the quarrel, it is obviously the boyfriend's fault, but in order to maintain this relationship, even if it is cold and violent, it will bow its head and take the initiative to seek peace;
They never ask for gifts because it's not easy for them to empathize with men.
It is said that such a girl is a good girl, and when she meets her, she must cherish it well, but in real life, there are very few such girls who can be treated kindly.
Because people know how to weigh the pros and cons, why should a person who does not need to pay any attention to himself care?
How can a woman who doesn't even know how to love herself get the care of others?
Zhang Ailing once said: "All women, in the end, have a place to live, not others, only themselves." "Love is a mirror, and a man's attitude toward a woman depends on the woman's own attitude toward herself.
Follow your own feelings, learn to please yourself, so that we will love ourselves and men will love you.