From an early age, people with autism show characteristics that are different from those of ordinary children, such as difficulty in understanding and expressing language, difficulty in establishing emotions with those around them, abnormal responses to various sensory stimuli, and fixed behaviors. Compared with ordinary children, the care and education of autistic children are more difficult, as the parents of these children, it is inevitable that they will often feel distressed and bored, but we are not helpless, as long as parents actively take their children to treatment, with a strong and loving heart to accompany children, will always let their closed hearts sprinkle into the sun.
Autism is a developmental disorder caused by abnormal brain function that can usually be detected before the age of two and a half years. Early detection and early intervention are important to help these children improve their symptoms.
With the advancement of medicine, people have more and more ways to help these "star children" strengthen their connection to the world around them, although it is still not completely curable for autism, but learning and adapting to social life can help them reduce anxiety and irritability, but also let them live better when they grow up.
A little patience for an inch of progress
Ms. Yu, 35 years old, full-time housewife, son Tong Tong (pseudonym) 8 years old, suffering from autism.
When Tong Tong was 4 years old, she did not say a word, and Ms. Yu did not think so at that time, thinking that the child just started slower than other children. It wasn't until a relative alerted her that she was alert to the possibility that her son might develop autism. Later, Tong Tong was diagnosed with autism by two doctors, and his condition had reached a moderate degree at this time.
There is no medication for autism, only by adjunctive treatment. During that time, Ms. Yu let Tong Tong receive homework therapy, speech therapy, music therapy, brain reaction therapy, etc., and did everything she could to make him recover. Speaking of Tong Tong's treatment, she smiled slightly: "Although there is still no medicine to cure this disease, as long as it is found early, parents pay time and patiently assist him, and the child will slowly learn to adapt to daily life." ”
Before tong tong is treated, he can play with the same doll again and again year after year, and the game is the same every time, he will arrange them in a fixed way, even if you deliberately change the order of the dolls, he will still restore them to their original state. He had hardly spoken since the birth of the child, and the only sound he made was a sudden high-decibel shout, but then he returned to silence.
Tong Tong never dared to step barefoot on the grass and sand, nor did he dare to dip into the water, and when he came into contact with these objects, he would show great fear. His hand posture is also very stiff, often unable to grasp things tightly. He doesn't play with other kids, even if the kids next to him have a lot of fun, he can just play alone all day. He seemed to be living in a big balloon, and he didn't react to anything outside the balloon, as if it had nothing to do with him. Every time he was called, even face to face, he played with himself. Unless you touch him with your hand, he will look up slightly.
The reason why Ms. Yu did not notice his abnormality before Tong Tong was 4 years old was because Tong Tong always played with his own things in the same corner and looked very well-behaved and quiet. "He only occasionally lost his temper and pushed down things on the table, or pushed me down, or hid in a corner on the side. At that time, I thought that he was just a slower development of language, and as for his emotional behavior, I also felt that he was introverted. Because the child does not make a lot of disturbing others, there is no in-depth investigation. ”
Ms. Yu is a full-time housewife and has plenty of time to spend with children, which is very helpful for the treatment of children with autism. Ms. Yu studied with Tong Tong, went home and taught him carefully, and in the past four years, the degree of progress of the child is very gratifying.
Referring to the changes in Tong Tong, Ms. Yu said: "He already knows how to wash his face and brush his teeth, he can walk barefoot on the grass, the beach, and he can swim, but he still needs some help to take a bath." He also knows how to eat on his own and is no longer afraid to sleep alone. What's even happier is that he no longer lives in his own world and can finally play with three or four children. "These are the results of Ms. Yu's step-by-step resistance to the cultivation of sexual children.
Ms. Yu firmly believes that as long as the child is taught step by step by the method taught by the therapist, the child should get a good improvement. "When you are discouraged, you can't let yourself be depressed for too long, you have to cheer up quickly, and you have to help your children." If the person who is a mother does not help him, it will be more difficult for others to help him, which will greatly affect the progress of the child's recovery. Ms. Yu said.
Speaking of the process of teaching, Ms. Yu said that she had risen in anger several times, but Tong Tong still did not respond to her. Ms. Yu thought that the child herself did not want this, and her heart immediately softened. She recalls the situation at that time: "In the first three or four months it would be more difficult and need to give him a lot of attention, and then gradually after getting on track, life became easier." ”
Later, Ms. Yu found that the treatment time was too tight, so for nearly a year, she only let Tong Tong focus on language therapy. At present, he can already say some simple sentences. In order to let Tong Tong get more development, Ms. Yu found him a private primary school to study.
Caring for a child with autism for 8 years is not easy. Ms. Yu will occasionally take tong tong out to eat after his condition is stable. Despite this, some of the child's sensitive symptoms of sound have not been completely cured, and the child may sometimes scream inexplicably, or suddenly go to grab the food of the neighbor, and Ms. Yu and her husband will apologize for his behavior. It's all a consequence of his dysfunction.
"Sometimes we are also sad because of the explanation of the situation, some people still do not accept, can not understand our situation, think that we condone children in public places. The bitterness of raising autistic children, coupled with people's criticism, makes the heart even more uncomfortable. But we can't always stay out because our children have such problems, right? Referring to this, Ms. Yu will feel very wronged, and she also hopes that people can give more tolerance and understanding to autistic children, after all, they have no malice. If the world opens its doors to them, these children will have more opportunities to embrace the world.
Autistic children's emotional loss of control is often due to sensory imbalance. Sensory system disorder is the incongruity of people's visual, auditory, tactile and other senses, for example, children with hearing disorders may show panic and fear when they hear some sounds. Most of the sensory systems in people with autism are abnormal, but the degree varies from person to person, so people with autism may show different responses to the same stimuli.
Some sounds would irritate him, like the sound of an ambulance. He didn't understand what it sounded, he just thought it sounded dangerous and scared him, but he didn't know how to express it, so he would shout. Therefore, as a parent, you must always patiently explain to him. Ms. Yu said.
The company of loved ones trumps everything
Mr. Qian, 65, retired staff member, son Xiaoyang, 25 years old, suffers from autism.
When Xiaoyang was 3 years old, Mr. Qian found that he was not quite right, and Xiaoyang's development process was much slower than that of ordinary children, such as sitting, climbing, walking, eating, especially in terms of speech, which was the most obvious, and he had not said a word in 3 years. At the same time, he also found that the child's hands were very stiff, could not turn, could not hold things, and many basic skills could not be learned. Later, after the diagnosis of the brain doctor, it was found that Xiaoyang had autism, but suffered from no cure. In recent years, the more common adjuvant therapy such as speech therapy, physical therapy, and occupational therapy was still very rare in those years.
Mr. Qian had no choice but to send the child to the disability center, thinking that the child's condition could be improved. But more than 10 years have passed, and Xiaoyang's situation has not changed at all. Mr. Qian admitted: "At that time, I did not know enough about this disease, and not understanding that autism and disability are actually two completely different things. Put the child in an inappropriate place, and his progress will naturally be greatly limited. ”
At that time, in addition to sending the child to the disability center during the day, Mr. Qian also hired a maid at home. "At that time, I thought that inviting someone to take care of him would be able to take care of his life in an all-round way, but I didn't expect this kind of help to help his condition." Now that I think about it, I really regret it, and I should have spent more time with him when he was a child and taught him some simple self-care skills. ”
When it comes to his son, Mr. Qian is always very remorseful that he did not take care of himself: "Seeing that many children with autism now have a close relative to accompany and teach around the clock, the progress is also very optimistic, and my heart is both happy and envious." ”
Finally, when Xiaoyang was 18 years old, Mr. Qian took advantage of his free time after retirement to begin to accompany Xiaoyang the whole time. "I know it's too late, but I have to keep at it, at least let him learn to take care of himself." Mr. Qian said.
After retirement, Mr. Qian actively participated in non-governmental organizations or gatherings of parents of autistic children held by non-governmental organizations or hospitals. These gatherings allow parents to talk to each other and exchange experiences. Through these gatherings, Mr. Qian really understood autism. "After the exchange, I learned that autism, like other diseases, must also receive interventional adjuvant therapy as soon as possible, as well as the teaching of pattern communication system, the ideal age is 3 years old. Many of them can't speak, and if they want to express themselves, we make a list of pictures for him to choose, and they are thirsty and will draw pictures of drinks; if they want to go to the toilet, they will draw pictures depicting the toilet. But there are items in the pictures of the toilets, and we have to have them in the toilets so they don't get confused. ”
Mr. Qian is very pleased that the types of pictures are very complete, involving all aspects of life. Children can choose what they need directly in the picture. Without the help of pictures, they can't express themselves, they will feel frustrated, angry, and may lose their temper because of this, but they are not willful. "As long as we know what he's trying to say and let him get it, he'll be quiet."
Mr. Qian, who has spent more than 20 years with children with autism, found that children face great difficulties in cognitive recognition. For example, he said, when an adult sees a dog (or a pattern in a book) and tells a child that it is a dog, then the child will see any kind of dog and know that it is a dog. Such a perception is easy for ordinary people. But, autistic child, when you teach him, he understands that you are talking about dogs, but when he meets another dog outside, even if it is only different from the previous one, you ask him what it is, and it may take a long time for him to tell you that it is a dog, or he can't answer at all, because he thinks it is another completely strange animal. This is not because autistic children have a bad memory, on the contrary, they have unimaginable amounts of information in their heads, but they just can't recognize, organize and organize them well.
The senses of autistic people are different from those of ordinary people. Everything they see, hear, and smell is recorded in their heads, but their brains don't know how to process this information, which makes them feel confused, even panicked, and don't know how to be good, so they will show a great reaction. It's like when we're suddenly being played by several people at the same time, and we feel panicked and don't know how to deal with it for a while, and they're in that situation all the time.
After Mr. Qian retired, he spent all his time training his children to take care of themselves. Although in the initial stages, the child always makes a mess, but with some patience, the situation will slowly improve. Referring to the changes during this time, he sighed: ". The involvement of relatives is really important for autistic children, for example, if you send him to school, make sure that when you come home, the school teaches exactly the same as the family, otherwise he will feel confused, which is irreplaceable by nannies or others. Therefore, the company and understanding of the family is the most important. ”
Author Wang Zhenhu