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Do you know how long the shortest marriage in the world lasts?
Three minutes. It took only three minutes, from just registering the marriage, to turning around and getting divorced.
What exactly is it that beats this marriage? In fact, it is a smallest and smallest thing from an objective point of view.
In Kuwait, a couple registered their marriage in a local court. Sweet and sweet, love each other go.
When all the formalities were done and the bride was ready to leave, the bride accidentally fell.
Supposedly, the bridegroom immediately went up to him and comforted him, and the marriage could continue.
But the groom did not do this, he stood in front of the bride and laughed, and scolded disdainfully: "Stupid! ”
This annoyed the bride, and she herself got up and shouted, "Divorce! ”
Before the bridegroom could react, the bride went to the judge and demanded that the marriage be dissolved.
Some people may say that the bride is a bit pretentious, and this little thing is worth divorcing.
But in fact, when a woman decides to spend her life with a man, she cares about how much weight she has in the man's heart and whether he cares about his feelings.
In his most embarrassing time, the man did not dissolve himself, did not care about his embarrassment, and also made a mockery, indicating that he did not care about himself at all.
So to defeat this marriage is, it is a life detail.
The devil is in the details. The same is true in marriage.
We often hear that two people have no reason to look at each other on a blind date, and many of them are very trivial.
For example, there is dust on the boys' shoes; eating bar to spit out; not helping girls move chairs;
For example, the micro-expression of the girl's face; the untidy dress; the speech is loud; and so on
These are small things, but if you have to scrutinize them carefully, one small detail reflects many problems: a person's upbringing, life habits, education level, temperament, and so on, which are related to all aspects of marital happiness.
Not paying attention to details when getting married can easily lead to the failure of marriage; not paying attention to details in life is easy to make people around them chill.
Our emotional world is made up of small details. Love or no love, pain and no pain, will be reflected in the details. It's always the most heart-warming details that touch people's hearts.
The details are in place and warm, and the feelings can last. If you don't do a good job of a small link, you can also ruin a good relationship and destroy a happy marriage.
According to the judicial big data of divorce disputes in Zhejiang Provincial Courts in 2018, among the main reasons for nearly 50,000 couples to apply for divorce, the first is not the infidelity and betrayal that everyone thinks, but the trivial matters in life, which account for 34.21% of the total number of divorces.
Therefore, marriage, success is also detailed, and failure is also detailed.
Two days ago, a girl chatted with me in private. She said that she was so depressed, although it had been almost half a year since that incident, but now that she thought about it, she was still very sad and embarrassed.
She said that she did not have to embarrass the groom, because it was a custom. She thought that her boyfriend knew, so when talking about marriage, she did not deliberately bring up this matter separately to talk about it, and the result was terrible consequences.
The girl' name is Zou Yi (pseudonym), and she is 27 years old. Originally going to get married on National Day last year, now it is alone, and there are still many criticisms and rumors behind him.
Her marriage was also defeated in a small detail, not that she and the other party had any bad words and deeds, but ignored a link in the wedding process, resulting in her own total loss.
Zou Yi and boyfriend Yang Longbo (pseudonym) are online lovers. Maybe you don't believe it, but they really know and love each other because of the Internet.
Zou Yi is a music lover, and her favorite is a popular male singer in the last century.
When her peers are crazy for the current traffic singers, Zou Yi laughs at herself for being old, having a generation gap with her peers, and having no friends around her who can resonate with her, so when she saw Yang Longbo's message about her idol on a music platform, she was immediately moved.
They chatted through the Internet for a long time, as if they had met Zhiyin. The online chat has been unable to stop the inner miss of each other, they rushed to appear.
After meeting, they found that the other party actually met their imagination of love, and they were moved. At that moment, Zou Yi felt that she could go crazy for love, and she decided to marry for love.
Zou Yi is an action faction with strong execution. After meeting Yang Longbo several times, she took the initiative to resign and went to Yang Longbo's city to find a job and rent an apartment. When everything was done, she appeared in front of Yang Longbo and told Yang Longbo that she was here for him.
Yang Longbo was of course very moved, so he gave her a grand marriage proposal ceremony.
He asked a friend to arrange an arch made of flowers outside the gate of Zou Yi's company, which was covered with stars and the moon. When Zou Yi finished his shift and walked out of the company gate, the stars and moon on the arch flashed one by one, Yang Longbo walked to the arch, stopped Zou Yi, knelt down on one knee, and gave a ring and his promise.
Zou Yi was very moved, and after putting on the ring tremblingly, he agreed to Yang Longbo's marriage proposal.
Young people, love, reckless. Yang Longbo proposed to Zou Yi to complete the marriage, and only then did he tell his parents about it, but his mother opposed it.
The reason why the mother objected was that she did not want her daughter-in-law to be an outsider.
According to Zou Yizhun's mother-in-law's words: Foreign daughters-in-law, there are many troubles. The mother's family is not here, and many things depend on the in-laws, so they must not exhaust her to death.
The mother-in-law is taking into account the reality of the problem. He is not young, after the son and daughter-in-law have children, they will not feel too tired to bring their own belts and help their mother's family, and besides, if they can find a rich and status family, Yang Longbo's future development will also be promoted by the Yue family.
What's so good about finding a daughter-in-law from a foreign country? Except tired is tired.
The mother-in-law did not agree, and every day at home to find things to toss Yang Longbo, taking up Yang Longbo's time full, just did not want him to go out to see Zou Yi.
And Zou Yi's side, because Yang Longbo was often driven by his mother to run around, there was not much time together, and there were some complaints in his heart.
Yang Longbo was torn between his mother and his lover. In the end, under the hard bubble of Yang Longbo's death, his parents still agreed to their marriage, including promising to give the Zou Yi family a dowry of 60,000.
The mother asked Long Bo in a nonchalant manner, "What else does her family want?" ”
Yang Longbo said: "There is also a change fee. ”
"Got it."
Zou Yi and Yang Longbo's wedding was held twice. Zou Yi first returned to his hometown and held a wedding banquet.
This banquet is very simple, that is, invite the bride's relatives and friends to come to a meal and tell everyone that their daughter is married.
Then Yang Longbo went to the woman's house to pick up the relatives and bring the bride price with him. After the wedding banquet of the mother's family, he went to his city with Zou Yi, Zou Yi's parents, and several close relatives to hold a formal wedding.
The wedding of Yang Longbo's family should be more solemn, and each process has been designed with the help of a wedding company in advance. Yang Longbo felt that it was almost the same thing, Zou Yi would always think of getting better, the plan had been overturned by Zou Yi many times, both of them were overwhelmed, and several times both of them were angry and did not speak for several days.
Now that we have finally entered the marriage process, everyone is relieved. Who would have thought that this wedding would go wrong because of the change fee.
Everything went well on the wedding day. Zou Yi stayed at the hotel, and Yang Longbo took Zou Yi from the hotel to his home.
Yang Longbo's home is a two-story superimposed villa, his home is the first and second floors of the lower stack, and the ceremony of toasting tea to his parents is arranged in the courtyard.
Under the guidance of the emcee, Zou Yi shyly replied to the in-laws to pay tribute to the tea. The mother-in-law took the tea and handed Zou Yi a red envelope.
Zou Yi took the red packet, felt that it was not right, and said directly to Yang Longbo: "The change fee is not right." How can this have 20,000 yuan. ”
As soon as this sentence came out, the in-laws and Yang Longbo looked at each other, and none of the relatives and friends who were present to watch the ceremony dared to speak. Only the neighbors, with a lively look on their faces.
The mother-in-law's face sank. Yang Longbo said, "You mentioned that there is a change fee. This is the change fee, our rule is 1001 (one in a thousand). ”
"But our rule there, the change fee is 20,000." There is no 20,000, how do I change my name to Mom. ”
Yang Longbo stood up "Teng" and said, "You said you wanted to change the mouth fee, I gave it!" You didn't tell me that the change fee was 20,000. You don't say it beforehand, you are telling me it is 20,000, do you want me to ride a tiger and take advantage of me? ”
Listening to Yang Longbo's words, Zou Yi secretly cried bitterly in his heart: How come he forgot to say the amount of the change fee? In her hometown, she did give 20,000 yuan for the change of mouth, and she did not want much.
"However, without 20,000, how can I change my mouth?" I was negligent beforehand. But there is no 20,000 change fee, I will be laughed at. ”
"You are married to us, and you must follow our rules here." The change fee is 20,000, and you really dare to ask for it. Call your parents, you want 20,000 yuan, my family really can't afford to marry you! You might as well go back to your hometown and find someone to marry. ”
After Yang Longbo finished speaking, he turned around and entered the house with his parents and left Zou Yi in the courtyard. The people who watched the liveliness all ate and laughed and dispersed, leaving only Zou Yi and the two sisters of the mother-in-law, as well as the people of the wedding company.
This wedding died like this, Zou Yi was very sad, she had asked Yang Longbo to explain that she really did not mean to embarrass him at the wedding, and blamed herself for not ignoring this small detail.
Now Zou Yi still lives in the city where Yang Longbo is located, and it turned out that she was ready to leave, but because of her good career development, she was reluctant to give up. But here, people often point fingers and poke at her. Moreover, she also heard that Yang Longbo, at the request of his mother, began to associate with local girls, cutting off the hope of the two reuniting.
I had carefully asked Zou Yi if she really wanted more money and deliberately chose to be at the wedding, so that Yang Longbo was forced to agree.
Zou Yi was very excited: "I knew that everyone would look at me like this." I deserve it, I never do things over the brain, I do things very impulsively, I don't turn. I had to turn a few more turns in my head, and it wouldn't be like that. ”
In the whole wedding, the change fee is a small part, everyone can not neglect the bride price and dowry, but will ignore some seemingly very small things, like the author I can ignore the bride price, after all, there are still a few, so I can understand Zou Yi in the wedding after the big project, neglect the embarrassment of the small project.
Of course, on the surface, it does give people the impression of threatening Yang Longbo, but when it comes to the reasons, it also makes people feel pity. As mentioned above, Zou Yi is the kind of person who acts quickly, and her first reaction is to distinguish each other, but she forgets that she is at the wedding, and her words and deeds are indeed inappropriate, so it has led to the disgust of Yang Longbo and his family.
Marriage Pope John Gottman said that the key to the success of a relationship is not in a candlelit dinner or on a romantic beach, but in the care of the partner, the care of the small moments of life.
Nothing in a relationship is a trivial matter. When everything goes well, those small things are not worth mentioning; and when there is a problem in the details, people are not machines, and they are often affected by emotions, and those small things become big things, affecting the direction of feelings.
There are no small things in marriage and love, and I hope to deal with these small things well and add points to your feelings.
Good times are always short, thank you for reading this, I hope the story between us will continue, the bar is ready to listen here, is your story ready?