After my son was depressed, I learned to be a father

"Juvenile Depression" is in progress.

Wu Jia, bipolar disorder, also known as bipolar disorder, sometimes depressed, sometimes emotionally high, insomnia sleepy, irritable, body stiff and numb, many attempts to commit suicide.

There are mentally ill people in the blood of the family, the mother died early, the father remarried, and the younger brothers and sisters were sent away. Fathers are obstinate and neglect to pay attention to and care for their families and children.

Wu Jia studied in Japan, and on the eve of graduation, because her emotions swayed sharply like a swing, sometimes painful, sometimes hyperactive, and finally diagnosed with bipolar disorder.

30 years ago, his second brother was studying in a foreign country, and he also contracted mental illness on the eve of graduation and committed suicide. The father was afraid that the tragedy would repeat itself on Xiao Wu and began to care for Xiao Wu.

After the death of his mother, his parents formed a new family and left their younger siblings to raise with relatives. In the new family, Wu Jia's life has been difficult. His father was busy at work and had no time to take care of Wu Jia, and his father and son had no opportunity to cultivate feelings. Because her parents and stepmother often quarreled, Wu Jia became the stepmother's punching bag. In winter, there is no warm clothing, the hands and feet are full of frostbite, and the meal is also a full meal. At school, classmates and teachers saw that Xiao Wu was not loved by his family and did not want to see him.

After Xiao Wu fell ill, his father clumsily led him around for medical treatment.

His father had planned to leave Xiao Wu by his side and take care of him as best as he could, but at the instigation of his relatives, his father's mind slowly wavered and he began to knock on the side to persuade him to return to Japan to find a job.

At that time, the doctor in Japan once told Xiao Wu that his condition was extremely easy to repeat, and it was recommended to find an easy job and make himself stress-free. Don't expect too much from yourself, just hope for peace for the rest of your life. However, under the gentle persuasion of his father, Xiao Wu still agreed to go to Japan against his will.

In Japan, Xiao Wu's condition recurred, and on a business trip, he tried to jump off a bridge to commit suicide, and had no choice but to return to China.

After recuperating at home for two years, Xiao Wu began to return to society. In order to make a living, Xiao Wu worked as a husband, decorator, cleaner, tasted the cook, and kept the night market, and once he felt bored or unable to do so, he put down his livelihood to recuperate for a while.

Yes, poor children with diseases, poor families with mentally ill children, and families with genetic history are even more a disaster.

When I took my daughter to the hospital, both mothers and daughters I saw were patients. The last time was when my twenty-five-year-old daughter was hospitalized as a patient and graduated from a key university, but because of bipolar disorder, she couldn't help but laugh and nag, and lay in bed in a crowded ward with disheveled clothes.

The second time she was hospitalized, she saw her old mother come to the hospital, and she became a caretaker. Because of the electroconvulsive icon treatment, short-term memory loss, I greeted her warmly, but she was dazed and said that she did not know me.

Several netizens who know each other also said that there are immediate family members in their families who have diseases in this regard. A netizen said that his family has been inherited for three generations.

I think that genetics are very powerful, but if the family parenting style is appropriate, encouraging, recognizing, accepting, loving, warm, then the genes should not be stimulated, and the child can grow up healthily.

When I was hospitalized, very few of the children I met were sick due to family genetics, and most of them were unfortunate to suffer from mental illness because of improper family parenting methods, pain accumulated from childhood, and serious lack of spiritual nutrition.

However, genetics, coupled with the unfortunate original family, the child is likely to have no way to escape. Wu Jia in the text is like this, and so is my daughter.

Once upon a time, I stood in the position of a victim and held a grudge against my daughter.

One day, a parent in the group weakly asked, saying that he often couldn't help but curse his children to die, was he mentally ill? The psychological counselor in the group comforted her, this is nothing, most of the parents in the group have done this, which is normal.

Yes, I've done that too. I feel that I have worked hard for half my life, and I have been looking forward to my daughter's life after graduating from college and working, and her life will be easier and better. But now because of her sick daughter, the prison sentence has suddenly become life imprisonment, and there is no hope for the rest of her life, so painful, so bitter, so desperate, how can we not be chaotic, can we not forget that we are still a mother?

I was very impressed by the comments of two mothers after my article, and one mother said that she cursed her daughter every day to die in a car accident. Another mother said she hoped her daughter would marry into her in-laws' house in the future and was beaten and tortured. In order to repay the hatred of being hurt by her daughter at the moment.

When I was in the hospital with my daughter, once several parents got together to talk about their children, mentioning their children's various works and willfulness, and they all hated it and itched their teeth. A 14-year-old mother said with tears in her eyes: "To be honest, sometimes it is a relief for everyone to think that the child is dead." She herself was so uncomfortable to live, so that the family also suffered. The other moms nodded in agreement.

But in fact, mothers can't even bear to send their children to a closed ward, and they are not willing to accompany them, how can they really curse their own flesh and bones? What about giving up such a young life? However, under great pressure, parents return to the state of inner children, they will also panic and fear, they will also be dazed, they also want to escape, they also want to become willful, they can vent their emotions at will, and go home to find their parents to comfort their little children.

After learning and growing and changing, especially Ms. Zhang Defen's "Meet the Unknown Self", it gave me a lot of inspiration, yes, "Honey, there is no one else out there, only yourself." "All inward seeking is the right direction for self-redemption and redemption." I am the root of everything. "

Therefore, the child is the most innocent victim.

As a parent, you can't decide your own destiny, but you must be able to determine the fate of your children. Therefore, parents must learn to grow and change, adjust cognition, improve themselves, enhance their inner strength, become the needle of the sea god at home, and become a powerful leader who turns the tide.