Fan consultation: The girlfriend's bride price is too high, the bride price is less than one point, should it be insisted? I graduated from a 211 university, did engineering design, and prepared a not very large wedding room at home

Fan consultation: The girlfriend's bride price is too high, the bride price is less than one point, should it be insisted?

I graduated from a 211 university, do engineering design, the family prepared a set of not too large wedding room, nearly 70 square meters, downtown lot, the house has been renovated, furniture and appliances are also ready, no loans, I have a small broken car to drive to and from work. The girlfriend is from the countryside, the university is in a relatively good three books, and now she is also working here at home.

I've been in love with my girlfriend for more than a year, I plan to get married next year, we got along very well when we fell in love, we had a lot of happy memories together, she was a kind girl who was willing to think about me. When the family was engaged, the contradiction arose, and her family said that the bride price should be at least 10.8w, and she would accompany a car. But she hopes to borrow money from her parents to buy a car and then pay back her parents' money, not to burden her parents.

My family is very attentive here, the decoration is as much as possible to do it yourself, and I booked a hotel wedding banquet a year in advance. The bride price is to do my best to get 5.8w, now there are two suites at home, I have a set of parents, because the excess area is more, so I also paid a lot of money according to the market price, in addition to borrowing 10w with relatives, there is no debt, plus the decoration of what the home does not have much money left.

Her family said that the least wedding bride price for girls in the village is 10.8w, if my family can't meet it, you can give a part first, and the rest is slowly saved before marriage, the amount is impossible to change. The whole family has tried its best to give you the best, not only for her to quit her job and go home to find a new job, most of the expenses are also borne by me, how much money is not a big problem, it is worth it to be happy. Marriage is based on two people like each other and are willing to form a family, just because the bride price thing has become so undesirable, before her family also told me not to worry about the bride price, and my family really can only take out so much, because she is my first love so unwilling to give up, reality makes me tired and sad, I don't know if I should insist?

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Emotional Mentor Answers:

The problem is not first of all in the feelings, not in her, but in the normal customs of differences, the bride price is actually a real problem that most partners can not avoid, many partners eventually miss each other because of the bride price, and ultimately end up here.

Her family proposes a bride price, and you can't meet it at present, you still have to communicate with her when you encounter such a situation, because she understands your actual situation, you need to first unify your voice, find a solution to the problem that both people can recognize, and then go to inform the relatives on both sides, and then solve the contradiction.

If two people are not one heart, but independent, and both focus on the interests and ideas of their own families, in the end you are bound to lose trust and split your feelings, which is inevitable. Know that feelings are the core, as the owner of feelings, you must first consider each other, so that you can correctly overdo such a crisis.

Money seems to be the biggest problem, but it is not the biggest problem, the biggest problem should be whether you can be mature when you face obstacles. She certainly doesn't want to lose this relationship because of the money problem, so as long as the two of you are firmly confident, you only need to notify your family after negotiating a plan, and you don't need to ask for advice, you can go over.

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