Author: Zhao Xiaoming Editor's Layout: Cui Guanli
Quotes from Bob
Children must not only accept the castration of social language and parental language, but also the castration of school language and peer language.
01
Relationships are important identifiers
Some parents told me that his children are not willing to socialize, have no friends, will not take the initiative to find friends to play from a young age, go to junior high school, ask friends to play, and have to let their parents help him make an appointment. His parents let him go out and he didn't want to move.
He saw a psychological influencer expert on the Internet say: It doesn't matter if children don't want to socialize. Some people just want to stay away from others and stay alone. Don't use secular standards to demand such children.
My parents asked me again:
Internet celebrity psychological experts say so, is it really not to use secular standards to demand their children? But he always felt that his heart was not solid, was this really okay? He didn't know what to do.
But any real practitioner who is a front-line counselor will not support this view. It can be seen how low the level of these psychological influencers is!
02
Social adaptability
Now Bob gives you a glimpse of really reliable psychology.
All the questionnaires in the world that measure mental illness must have a question, a factor, which is used to test interpersonal sensitivity. It may be that the expression of this sentence is different, but it is judged by interpersonal relationships as an important indicator and sign of mental illness.
It's like saying: as long as there is a fever, it means that there is inflammation, so in clinical medicine, fever is one of the most important indicators, which is why the new crown virus epidemic prevention, everywhere will measure the body temperature.
In psychology, as long as you have poor interpersonal relationships, it means that you have some kind of psychological disorders and problems.
This is the same as the fever is an iron law, do not believe those two knives, you do not look at those psychological Internet celebrities, there is a famous university degree, many famous universities psychology teaching level is very poor.
Whether it is an ordinary mental illness, including severe schizophrenia, the indicator of whether he is cured or not is to look at the adaptability of his social function and the degree of recovery of social function.
The social function is to see whether a person's interpersonal indicators reach a normal level.
Mental illness is not the same as physical disease, physical disease is judged by the lesion, and mental illness, its standard is social adaptability. That's why the interpersonal factor is so important!
03
Hypotonia syndrome
Man is a social animal, man is an ant, man is a lion, man is a wolf, man is not a tiger, all community animals in the world are the same, leaving the community basically means being eliminated or dying.
What is schizophrenia? Its sociological implication is social withdrawal, social avoidance, and lack of normal interpersonal function and social adaptability.
This is why we also call hypotonia syndrome a type of psychosis, because the biggest feature of hypolivity syndrome is also social withdrawal and social avoidance.
If a person can't adapt to the nature of human life as a group creature, you live in an isolated group, it does not prove that you are excellent, nor can it prove that you are healthy, understand!
04
Psychological Internet celebrities are not good at learning
So why are these new influencers always bragging, one person wants to be lonely, one person wants to live out of the group, one person does not mix with everyone?
Because of these psychological influencers, this is how he spent his childhood.
Those psychological internet celebrities you are most familiar with, they are a very restrained state in the process of offline social networking, similar to the sketches of Zhao Benshan that you see. And a man exhibits a lot of feminine traits. You eat with him, and you can clearly observe interpersonal maladaptation.
It is precisely because of their social incompetence and lack of interpersonal adaptability in real interpersonal interactions that they are forced to spread their illness to everyone online with extreme theories.
If everyone is as sick as he is, he doesn't feel sick anymore, and he can pretend to be healthy.
The biggest problem of psychological Internet celebrities is that they are not skilled in learning, looking at problems are too shallow, and society always rewards people who are at the center of social nodes, which is the essence of human community life.
If you try to violate the nature of human life as a community, you will inevitably be punished.
You can say that you are willing to accept punishment, but in fact you do not have the ability to enter the center of the human social node, and the center of the social node is the center of power, the center of all resources.
05
The result of marginalization is depression and suicide
All group animals in this world will do their best to become social nodes, because once they become people at the end of social networks, they are actually marginalized. The end result of marginalization is actually depression and suicide.
This is why there is a special class in the psychology university curriculum that is commonly used around the world to teach social network analysis.
The lesson taught in the university psychology textbook is to teach students to learn to use social network analysis maps to analyze those who have risk factors in any group, so as to intervene and provide them with crisis psychological assistance in a timely manner.
Social network analysis can quickly calculate a class, a team, a village of marginalized people, and these people will eventually be pushed by society to the failure of life, and the final result is actually marginalization.
06
Effects on children
The impact on children is even greater.
You can go to any class at any school and do a calculation using the social network analysis graph I taught you. All the children at the end of the social network analysis, they are in the class, there are very few friends, they are marginalized children.
The biggest characteristics of marginalized children are: poor learning, no motivation, and one can only stay at home to play games; or deal with other classmates in a way that disobeys mischief and trouble.
The first type will eventually become a child with depression and suicide marginalization or hypotonia syndrome.
The second type has the potential to develop into an antisocial personality tendency to become a psychopathic killer.
Finally, have you ever wondered what your children do if you, as a parent, are socially awkward, isolated, and marginalized?
On the one hand, it is difficult for such a person to have the opportunity to enter the marriage, and on the other hand, after entering the marriage, it will affect the child's social ability.
We've seen children like this at summer camps, and it turns out that his parents are just as socially awkward and never friends.
The Silent Lamb and hannibal, the psychoanalyst in the American drama Hannibal, manipulate the patient's mind and guide the patient to kill for him, while he is mainly responsible for cannibalism.
Some of his patients are antisocial personalities, but what about himself? What kind of mental disorder is it, and is he normal? In Bob's analysis, he is closer to the control personality disorder under the antisocial personality disorder spectrum.
Original public account: Heart Partner (ID: xhbeap)
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