In the streets and alleys, there is a little open space, and the old people dance to the music.
In the mahjong parlor, there are also many people, everyone holds a few plastic squares, piles them up, and disassembles them, over and over again, and never gets tired of it.
The party is even better, a group of people eat and drink, and they have to go singing, or go to the nearby park for a walk, and pull everyone's past memories, which is very picturesque.
Even in the countryside, there are many old people dancing square dances, playing mahjong, and parties.
Anyway, everyone lives like this, so why don't I live like this after I retire?
There are exceptions to everything, there is a kind of old man, after retirement, who does not play mahjong, does not square dance, and does not participate in parties. They seem to be very different, but in fact they are very happy and have already understood the difference between "rotation and revolution".
For the rest of a person's life, whether they revolve around others or by themselves, the choices are different, and the mentality and living habits are also very different.
01
After retirement, reduce socializing, learn to have personal relationships, and get along without getting tired.
Those who don't like to be in groups don't give up all their relatives, friends, classmates, old colleagues, etc. Instead, the social circle was narrowed, and some people and groups without temperature were not needed.
When doing subtraction, they still keep three or five confidants, or one or two reliable people.
Writer Jian Yuan wrote about a pair of old girlfriends around her.
They were elementary school classmates and were in their seventies.
After retiring, I haven't had much contact for a long time, and since both girlfriends lost their wives, there has been more contact.
Treat each other as the most important person, and then talk about childhood and growth stories together. It seems that all at once it is back to the younger years.
When one person is sick, another person comes to take care of it.
They all said: "It took a lifetime of suffering to find a sister, don't leave too early......"
Yes, when there are fewer people, it is easier to chat, and the hearts of people are closer. Therefore, the feelings are strong, and they can really drive away loneliness and soothe the soul.
The "Rule of 150" tells us that there are only about 20 people who are really familiar with you. When we are old, it is difficult to maintain a circle of more than 20 people, and it is good to maintain one or two, this is soberness.
02
After retirement, he does not join in the fun, refuses to blindly obey, and has no right or wrong.
There is a reunion organized by classmates, do you want to go to the old man's house?
Go ahead, one is that you have to give a sum of money, and everyone is AA; Second, you have to bear the travel expenses, after all, you can't walk to the meeting place; Third, you have to take responsibility for safety; Fourth, don't be greedy for wine.
If you like to drink and are drunk by everyone, you will make fun of everyone, but sadly, after everyone is happy, they will disperse, but you are still in the cold box, snoring and sleeping.
If you go too far, your children will fear for your safety, so they will scold you and send you to the meeting with great reluctance.
Of course, there are also some people who talk in the name of the party. Talk about how good your children are and how well you have worked, so as to save face.
When people are old, they still have to show off, brag, love face, be smart, etc. There is a lot of trouble when such people get together.
Dancing and playing mahjong are still difficult for people who don't fit in. It's embarrassing to follow someone else to do something you don't like.
From the beginning when you don't like to be lively, you will find that there is less right and wrong, the roots of your ears are pure, and you don't look at your face.
03
After retirement, cherish the family, several generations in the same house, and have endless fun.
My third aunt, since she retired, went to the provincial capital.
Throughout the year, except for going back to my hometown for the New Year and getting together with my brothers and sisters, I don't pay attention to the people in my hometown at other times.
Even if anyone holds a banquet, the third aunt will not come.
She has to take the baby in the provincial capital and pick up the baby to school every day. It's been a busy day.
Because he has been away from the local area for a long time, the social circle of the third aunt has become smaller and smaller. But she is happy, her children are respectful, and her grandchildren are having fun.
Whether it is local or out-of-town, whoever cherishes the family more will have a better family style.
The original intention of retirement is to retreat from the workplace to the family; The original intention of going to work is to rise from the family to the workplace. You don't have to understand, and you're always nostalgic for the one in the workplace.
The unit is a place to make money, and after making money, it is better to support the family.
In the same way, any group is itself a friend of interests. There is no financial interest, at least emotional interest. You can't feel it, so why bother?
Only the family, throughout our lives, all interests are in it, everyone brings benefits, and also enjoys benefits.
04
After retirement, he sought his own hobbies, self-development, and self-appreciation.
The old people who didn't go to the group were all depressed? No, they are alone, but they are happy and kind.
I've seen an old man playing with empty bamboo alone.
In small towns, empty bamboos are rare.
I also saw an old man who, after retirement, went to the countryside to learn how to weave a gnat, a chicken coop, etc. He has loved these things since he was a child, and he still likes them when he is old, like an old naughty boy.
I have seen an old man who makes a small bench, and I am a distant relative.
I wanted to buy a bench, but the old man refused, and said, "Just give it away, not sell it." ”
I like a saying: "Learning must be in line with one's own interests in order to be beneficial." ”
There is no conflict between allowing others to like to dance and play cards, and also allowing oneself to go to the countryside to farm and chop wood.
Because they allow themselves to be themselves, many old people chase "all sorts of things", they are happy, but their happiness is not known.
05
The orchids in the mountains do not bloom and are not fragrant because no one is looking.
Other kinds of old people are not happy because they are not accompanied by anyone, and they do not eat the fireworks of the world.
In "One Hundred Years of Solitude", it is written: "Everyone seems to be very lonely, and they try their best to relieve loneliness in their own way, but in fact they still continue their loneliness." Loneliness is the curse of creation on those who live in groups, and loneliness is the only outlet for loneliness. ”
It turns out that after retirement, people who seem to be lonely are rich in heart; People who are always crowded into the group are lonely inside.
Author: Cloth Clothes Coarse Food.
Follow my words and go into your heart.
The pictures in the article come from the Internet.