He Suohuan, a writer of sexual affective psychology, writes love stories, interesting strangers, and material knowledge.
The frequency of chatting is positively correlated with the degree of affection between each other.
The better your relationship, the more frequent the conversation; The weaker the feelings, the less interested you are in chatting with each other.
And the speed of replying to messages is also proportional to each other's feelings.
The more you like it, the faster you can reply to messages; The more you don't like it, the more you face each other's news.
Taking the initiative to chat with each other is a way for us to express our good feelings.
In the process of getting along with the opposite sex, if you like each other, do you want to chat with each other every day?
This requires you to judge the measurement from different angles.
-01
How can I tell if someone likes you through chat?
There are several obvious bases for judgment on this point.
First: Watch how quickly he replies to your messages
Generally speaking, people who like you and care about you, reply to your messages is often fast.
Even if you can't reply to the message in seconds, he will reply to you as soon as he receives your message.
A positive attitude of giving back is a sign that he cares about you.
Second: see if he is willing to take the initiative to chat with you
In a relationship, if you are the only one who is persevering and trying, it won't be long before you feel tired.
Without a response for a long time, people can easily give up.
However, if the chat status between you is not your initiative, the other party will also take the initiative to chat with you.
Like what:
Find you to share your life, find some topics to actively talk to you.
Taking the initiative is a hint of his heart.
Third: People who like you have a strong desire to share when chatting
You can clearly feel his enthusiasm, inner joy and emotional expression when chatting with you.
He will share all kinds of things with you.
Fun facts in life, troubles at work, your own family.
Every day, he wants to involve you in his life.
In fact, this strong desire to share is to like your performance.
-02
If the other person likes you, what kind of chat frequency is appropriate?
If you perceive that the other person likes you, what kind of chat frequency should you maintain with the other person?
Under normal circumstances, two people who have a good feeling for each other will chat every day.
In the early days of getting along:
The frequency of chatting is relatively high, and I will spend a lot of time chatting with each other every day.
Mid-Relationship:
The relationship has basically passed the period of hot love and gradually returned to flattening; At this time, the chatting enthusiasm of the two people subsided.
But they will also maintain a fixed time slot every day to chat with each other.
Late stage of getting along:
The chat frequency remains flat.
Techniques for liking each other and chatting between the opposite sex.
1. Listening + providing emotional value
In any relationship, a good listener is very likable.
Because everyone craves attention, approval, and listening from others.
When the other person shares it with you, you just need to listen carefully and show that you care and attitude.
Then, when his mood is low and there are more negative emotions, you can provide him with positive emotional value in time.
2. Praise + timely response
Don't skimp on your compliments.
For example:
He made a meal and took pictures to share with you.
What is his purpose?
On the one hand, he wants to show you that he is superb in cooking, and on the other hand, he wants to get your compliment.
At this point, you should say: "It looks delicious, but you don't see it, your cooking skills are really good; I don't know, when will I have the opportunity to eat your cooking? ”
The first half of the sentence is to express your praise and appreciation; The second half of the sentence is an expectation of your relationship, guiding the other party to reveal how they feel about you.
3. Create a feeling of "unfulfilled"
No matter how delicious things are, you can't eat too much at once, otherwise you will be tired and crooked.
When you talk about the climax, when you talk about the most anticipation, when you are most enthusiastic, it stops abruptly.
Just like the end of an O'Henry-style novel, it is necessary to leave suspense, leave blank, and create a feeling of "unfinished" for the other party.
Only by mobilizing the other person's emotions can he be interested in you and full of curiosity.
You can say: "Sorry, I have something to do, I'll talk to you in detail about the next chat~"
Do you understand?
When the opposite sex gets along, you can chat with each other according to these formulas, and you can't go wrong.
-03
How do you chat if the other person doesn't like you?
Remember one principle:
Pursue someone you like, and if he doesn't like you, don't bother too much.
In other words: don't chat with him every day, don't send him messages frequently, which will cause his dissatisfaction and disgust.
Empathy:
A certain person of the opposite sex talks to you every day, and every time asks:
"Have you eaten? What are you doing? Slept? Busy? Are you off work? Got to work? ”
You can detect his liking for you, but you're pretty sure you don't like the other person.
At this time, no matter what message the other person sends you, you are not willing to reply.
You feel particularly irritated by his "bombardment" messages.
You once wanted to delete and block him, but in the end you held back, just kept your distance and didn't reply to messages.
How do you chat with people who don't like you?
There are several key points to grasp:
Appropriate chat frequency, effective conversations, attractive topics, end chats without dragging.
Don't talk nonsense, only talk about topics that interest the other person;
Do not disturb excessively and maintain a sense of proportion;
Don't drag the mud and water, it's time to end the chat and end it on your own initiative.
Today's Topic:
What do you do if someone you don't like sends you a message?
(Article with picture source network)