Girl, you have to love independently, but also to love soberly

2022.4.25

Tell what love is

What is your need

Wen Xue was heartbroken

Figure/Source network

Wen/Wen Xue fell in love

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I have a passion that is wasted on things that are vague and abstract. Take your own imagination to intercept real examples, guess, and further verify. Defeated by the impact of real-world examples, exhausted but persistent.

For example, I often doubt human nature and doubt love. The state of beauty and comfort today, which is like this, will it change in the future? If that changes, then how will I deal with it then? Change is the norm, there is no doubt about it, and all the entanglements and sorrows stem from my desire to cherish the present moment too much, and even to seek eternity.

The paranoid genes of perfectionism came out again when I was at my most secure. It keeps telling me: If there is change in the future, if you can't have it forever, don't want it now.

So another voice came out of my heart, and it was encouraging me to give up, so I might as well stop the loss in time now to avoid the damage that had not happened. Even if this imaginary harm has not yet appeared any signs.

Including love.

For the love thing, I feel that I have also fallen into a state of paranoia lately. There are two reasons for this, and I don't know which one I belong to—

First, because there is more love, after years of getting used to it, it feels taken for granted; but people's desires are infinite, always eager to take more, if there is no further demand, the heart will not be satisfied. Or life is stagnant, subjective and objective have no sense of freshness to create, feel tasteless.

Second, there is a change in the psychology of the process of love, from the beginning of the desire to get a little love, to later want more love, until finally want the other party to give me all the love. With the change, the demand for spirit was relatively low in the past, and then it slowly became higher, and dissatisfaction will also be reflected in all aspects.

What exactly is love?

My boyfriend asked me this question before and I thought it was incredible. Elementary school students know what love is good or not, and you actually take it as a problem.

But now, I'm slowly wondering. What exactly is love?

Open the Little Red Book, the overwhelming standard is that loving you is to spend money for you, unconditionally transfer money to you, and meet all your needs. As a recipient of benefits, this is undoubtedly very comfortable, enjoying unlimited pampering and even doting, and it is also worth enviing. But is this really love?

If love really has to be reflected in specific things, today he cooks for me is to love me, tomorrow he does not help me clean the dishes is not to love me, the day after tomorrow he is impatient with me and does not love me. I think that if that's the case, then our standards for our lovers are too harsh.

I still remember a communication after an argument, and my boyfriend calmly told me that if you deliberately look for evidence of not loving from the trivial details of life, and do not let go of any suspected clues, then you can definitely find it.

After all, everyone has their own life, and it is impossible to love you as a lifelong mission. People always have tired and upset times, maybe this tiredness and upset do not come from the lover, but will be reflected together, but also need to be borne together.

In addition, if love can really be measured by materialized standards, then what does love have to do with non-love? As long as we live comfortably and happily, as long as we do not have bad money, then we have already met our needs. As long as I am rich enough, my nanny will love me; as long as I am rich enough, most people will serve me and will love me.

The question is, can money really replace love?

In love, girls will be sensitive and suspicious, and their sense of security will be reduced, because they cherish it, so they are eager to prove through what they want to prove that the other party loves themselves deeply. At present, many men are scheming and will act and deceive people, and slowly everyone learns to be smart, and money will evolve into the best measure.

Indeed, whether you love or not, if you get money, you will not suffer too much.

I began to reflect on my daily behavior, is it really under the influence of peripheral speech, and I am more and more inclined to this direction? Even if most people think and do this, can they say that this kind of thinking and behavior is correct? Not necessarily.

But I still feel that the more this time comes, the more girls have to establish their own spiritual system. It can be like a spring eye, constantly bursting out of energy on its own, and it can support its own set of rules for dealing with the world, and it can be independent. Even if you lose him, it doesn't matter.

I thought about what love is, and then I thought about it for a long time.

True love is probably spiritual trust and support, no matter when, as long as you think of it, you will give the other party unlimited warmth and strength. This kind of love is more difficult to achieve when you are alone. Good love is 1+1 greater than 2, and it is also 0.5+0.5 equal to 1.

The first love is to see the color of the intention, is to give the soul and, is to see the joy, the heart is very full; later love, will continue to grow with you. Love is growing, and you have to grow too. Until you become mature, the grasp of love is also relaxed, it is the full sustenance of the spirit, but also the icing on the cake of life, can make you better. Instead of inexplicable whimsy and gratuitous consumption.

The embodiment of this kind of love is not a direct giving of material and benefits, but it can provide spiritual motivation, self-confidence, security and a sense of belonging for the other party on the road of creation and struggle.

So what exactly is needed in love, don't be confused, figure it out for yourself. Being a sober and rational adult is more worthy of love by others.

Some people say that love is a luxury, and if someone loves and someone is loved, it must be lucky.